Help! What should I do?

Hmmm...

Well I think you've paid for enough but I know what you're saying. Could you afford £20?

If not, personally I would just get a small thoughtful gift.

If you cant afford to give cash, could you not buy a nice photo frame from boots as they were 1/2 price at the weekend and then they have something to put a nice photo in after the wedding

I suppose I could afford that, what Is the etiquette with gifting Money? I've not been to ANY weddings as a 'legal' drinker LOL so I haven't a clue!

If you can afford it, give them a gift, not dosh. I think you've contributed a fair bit already in terms of the dress they've asked you to wear so don't feel bad about it.

Surely they can't be expecting anything from you? Take what they've said at face value. Get them a lovely card and fill it with heartfelt words instead.

I'd buy them a gift rather than giving money. From the sounds of it you have spent enough with regards to this wedding. I hope it all works out.

Linda xx

It sounds like you've spent a fair whack already, so I think it's perfectly acceptable to get a token gift, if you can afford to.

ETA - I attended an expensive hen do last year, and Mr RB and expensive stag do. So we gave less than we usually would in terms of the wedding gift.

I'd always get something, even if it's just a token. Are you good at making anything? Do you know a friend who is?

You also don't need to get them something right away. I think your'e allowed to give gifts 6-12 months after the wedding.

You also don't need to get them something right away. I think your'e allowed to give gifts 6-12 months after the wedding.

Hey,

Bit tight that you paid for all that stuff and are still expected to give a load of cash too. I'd say the above suggestion of £20 or so is reasonable.

I'm going to a very expensive wedding in a few weeks - need new outfit and had to take a (big) loan out to go on the hen do (seriously) and a day off work to attend the wedding. Cash extra tight atm coz getting married myself in 2 months. I'll be giving a very nominal gift. Very nominal.

Bluddy Nora! How much was the hen do?!

I agree with everyone else about buying a token gift or maybe £20, you've forked out a hell of a lot already.

I echo what every one else has said, it sounds like you've spent enough and saved then in the process. I would buy a small gift, and give them no money.

I'd get a token, maybe a bottle of champers? We bought for OHs brother embroidered dressing gowns with Mrs and Mrs **** and we bought a gift box and out in a bottle of champers, two flutes and some truffles and madae it look pretty inside with tissue paper and whatnot. and they loved it!

More than a month's rent. Manchester rent too, none of your cheap out in the countryside rent lol ?

Hi;

My sister is my bridesmaid and she has paid for nothing but I am definitely not expecting a gift from her. She is a student and I know she doesn't have that much money. I would expect a card though.

My other bridesmaid has got quite a lot of money as she's a doctor but she does not live close. We are in London and she is in Glasgow. She is paying to have her hair done on the day but once again I have paid for everything else. I do though not expect a gift from her. She travelled down to my hen do from Glasgow and is paying for a two night hotel stay plus travel in the hotel when we get married. I estimate the combined amounts of what she is paying would total nearly £400. I definitely do not expect a gift from her and would be embarassed to get one.

If you want to get a gift then do but I defintely don't think you should be expected to.

?

We had a similar thing with MIL wedding - we just bought her a personal gift as we couldn't afford a large amount of cash and didn't want to stick £20 in an envelope - especially when she is contributing towards our wedding. I think a thoughtful gift will go down well and I'm sure that your brother would understand your circumstances.

I'd get a token thoughtful gift instead of giving the money. Something that will be appreciated and personal but doesn't have to cost you the earth.

I agree, get them a small token gift. Something that doesnt cost a fortune. The photo frame idea is a great one. We stock some lovely frames that can be engraved as well. What about something like https://www.engraving-excellence.co.uk/Brushed_Steel_Effect_Photo_Frame_-_6_x4_/p806218_4109785.aspx as a simple idea.

Definatly agree you shouldnt be expected to give anything, I didnt expect anything from my bridesmaids at all. Certainly you wouldnt be expected to give cash. It sounds like they are standard invitations that everyone is getting. I wouldn't worry

Really sorry to hijack this thread (I completely agree with the other posters by the way, a very small token gift and card) but Sarah, I was looking at your website yesterday and we are thinking of getting all our thank you gifts from you. Our wedding isn't until March next year and I was wondering if you know if you'll be expecting any other products in between now and then? The yoyo is great for the pageboy and the mirrors for the bridesmaid's and photo frames for mums but nothing stands out to me for our flower girls or dads... just wondering if you get new items very often?

Thanks!

We have been to a few weddings in the last few years and a group of us have put our money together and given them a combined amount, could this be something you could do, that way you could give a smaller amount but with out the worry of (unrightly) looking bad. x

I have to agree with the others, i wouldn't have thought the cash gift request applies to you. I have given my family all invites as they wanted them to keep and i too have asked for money towards our honeymoon but they all know that they only got that insert as it is just a part of the invitation. They will have all contributed to my wedding in their own ways. I also had the same with my sisters wedding- she asked for money and i wasn't expected nor did i give her money. I had bought all of my own outfit and what i done as a present was put a hamper together and snook it into their hotel room for them to enjoy when they went up. She loved it and said it was a beautiful thought and surprise to go back to! Maybe you could do something like that?

I agree with what others have said about just a small gift. Like a photo frame, or an album, or something wedding-ey.

But I'm sure if you spoke to them and said that you couldn't afford a gift after paying for everything, but obviously state that you're happy to have done this, then I'm sure they'd understand and not feel weird about it at all.