Hen do - issue with FMIL & FSIL

I do think their behaviour is a bit off but I wouldn't get too upset over it. Presumably they knew about Centre Parks' no car policy before they went? Some people just love a good moan, I'd just leave them to it and be sure to send them a menu with the prices in bold before inviting them anywhere else again.

Yes it does sounds like they were rather rude but as Kriek said, I wouldn't dwell on it too much.

I agree their behaviour was out of order. They will prob have no idea of how upset you are and won't even think they have done anything wrong. I would just think about the wonderful time you had with your friends and put it down to the fact they obviously enjoy their own company are lazy and tight ?

Yes, this does seem like unreasonable behaviour to me; have they shown signs of acting like this before or did it come as a shock? I suppose what's done is done - just try and look forward to your wedding now!

As others have said, I also think their behaviour was bad but as they sound like selfish people (MIL mainly) I would just leave them to it because you will never change them and just remember for the future.

The fact they were happy to spend money on themselves (spa treatments) but not on anything as a group just tells you that they were there for their own benefit.

As you have lovely friends who I'm sure made the rest of the weekend nice for you try not to dwell on it. I'd be angry too but you don't want it to outshine the good parts of the weekend.

All of this! Don't let them ruin things for you! x

I do find their behaviour unacceptable but look on the bright side - if they weren't such self centred people you would have had to put up with them for more than 5 hours.

As others have said just put it behind you and look forward to the wedding.?

Hi, sorry this is off the subject and I hope you get things sorted but...

How did you get to go to centre parcs for your hen? I emailed and got told they don't accept groups of the same sex, even though they understand not all hen partys are the same blah blah blah. I've also been told if they notice a booking for a group of same sex they question it. so how did you manage it?

Thanks!

I think MIL behaviour is pretty shocking but I wouldn't dwell on it I hope you had a good time anyway it must be hard for a MIL to go to a brides hen (I assume somewhat older then you/your friends and without the bond you and your mum have so may feel on a different wave length) not that it is any excuse for bad manners!!! I cant believe she said that about the bill how rude!!!

At least you got them there to start with my FMIL and FSIL who is also a bridesmaid have refused to come due to not knowing anyone!

Have never even told me themselves - just my sister who is organising it.

I find it really rude but nowt I can do and at least I can enjoy myself without worrying about them.

I just booked centre parcs as normal and it wasnt a problem. i even wore a bride to be sash and a tiara round the park and in a restaurant in the evening and it wasnt a problem xx

Thank you for all the advice - feeling a bit better but still annoyed!! xx

Maybe if you have older people in the party they don't question it? Ive been with my mum, stepmum, sister and one female friend each and it was never questioned, but they had a problem with mixed sex under 22s so think it's just a guess as to whether you'll be rowdy!

Well after the whole hen do saga (as above!) with the FMIL and FSIL I went out for dinner with my friends who shared an apartment with them.

Apparently the FMIL questioned my friends on my past, how they feel not be bridesmaids (FSIL is not a bridesmaid and apparently the whole family were upset by this!) and basically interrogated them.

I confronted my MIL and said that I was sorry that she was so far away (location wise) on the day and that wasnt my intention. She said she 'accepted my apology' and I said that if in future she wants to ask questions she should come to me directly and not to my friends.

Well she got upset, FSIL accused me of being horrible but we have drawn a line. FMIL said she would back off from the wedding but a couple of days later we found out she has been telling all the family where they are sitting during the wedding breakfast - well I havent even done the table plan yet!

Oh well keep smiling!

AND ... some advice please

I am right that the bride picks her bridesmaids and I havent missed a tradition that I should have the grooms sister? I am not close to her so that is why I didnt pick her but we asked her to do a reading.

I would like my brother to wear a suit (same as the bridal party) but my h2b is worried that will upset his mum as his sister is not a bridesmaid. My brother has done a lot for me and will be doing 'usher' type duties so I think he should - what do you think?

Sorry to hear your having so much trouble - some people just always like to have an opinion and a moan...

In response to your question, I think its up to the bride to choose whoever she wants, its your wedding after all ? In your situation you have asked your FSIL to do a reading so she is still involved. I also think you should ask your brother to wear the suit, if he is doing an usher type role and you want him to then go for it! I don't see why your FMIL would be upset about this - both are involved but traditionally those doing readings where normal guest wear, ushers wear the same as the bridal party.

We've got 7 weeks to go which I'm so excited about but have got the point where i am so over anyone else having an opinion about whether or not they should be bridesmaid, whether or not so and so should be invited etc etc, that I'm not going to let it ruin anything - they just have to get over themselves and be happy for us (which I'm sure at the end of the day they will be)

Good luck, I know its stressy!

Hope they didn't spoil it. I bet every single other participant was lovely and fun. Just think, your other half has had to put up with those moany ones for all those years!!