How can I tell her?

Oooooh, tough one! TBH I think that if she'd just slept around it wouldn't matter quite so much, but having a child.... ? Will she be pregnant at the time of the wedding or already a mother? To be quite honest I think it's disgusting for women who've given birth to have formal wedding ceremonies at all, never mind in white! I'd leave it to your mum to bring it up, and just add your voice to hers.

I am really sorry but i'm shocked that you think she has brought shame on your family. I realise that with certain faiths s*x before marriage is frowned upon but this is the 21st century and she is an adult who must be able to make her own decisions and life choices.

if she is a source of shame to you then you should not get involved and stay away from her wedding - if i thought my sister felt that way about me then she would not be welcome at my wedding.

you should be happy for your sister

edited to add: i very much doubt that more than 2 or 3 brides to be on this forum are going to be a virginal brides yet near 100% of the brides will be wearing white.

I sort of agree, I can't bear the married in white when you've been shagging for Europe half your life.

Tread carefully would be my advice. Good luck.

ummm without wanting to sound rude, if she wants to get married in church, in white, that's up to her surely?

There are many people who get married in church who have had previous relationship and some, shock horror, with children. I don't really see the issue and to tell her that she shouldn't be doing it, I personally think is unfair.

I think lunch is a good idea as she can't create too much of a fuss in public.

Is she seriously thinking about wearing white? ? I'd be too ashamed and I'd only had one previous partner before I got married.

Could you not just call her a slack knee-ed whore and be done with it? It'll be better coming from you than the priest in all fairness and although she may think it's harsh, she get over it and will realise she can have an equally as lovely wedding in the registry office wearing a nice lilac suit.

How widely known is it that she's a tramp? Can you keep it quiet, for the sake of her having a nice day. Obviously she wouldn't be able to bring her love-child to the wedding, but most people want child free days anyway tbh.

Does white suit her? Could you maybe go at it that way, by suggesting that it's a bit unflattering in older brides?

Sophie she has had the baby which I suppose make sit a bit worse. She wants to walk down the aisle with her child before her! Talk about rubbing it in! My mum could understand if she had the baby with her first boyfriend but 5 lovers, YES FIVE! and now she wants to get married in church, in the eyes of God, and in a white dress.

Would it be bad if I lied and told her white didn't suit her colouring and maybe red or black would be best? Mum has decided she is going to work on the venue.

Oh I'm glad she's finally settling down at 23!?!

When the Vicar asks if anyone knows any reason why they shouldn't get married why don't you stand up and say your piece then?

Does her fiance know how many boyfriends she has had? Do you think he ought to be told in case he doesn't want to be with someone 'like that'?

OMG!! I'm sorry - Im really shocked by your post! Surely you are happy she is settling down and not sleeping around anymore!!!! Without getting personal, I'm getting married in a church and I have had previous boyfriends.....and shock horror I'm wearing WHITE!!!!? ?

Surely its all about proclaiming your love for your H2B and pledging to be with them for the rest of your life....I feel like I'm going to be shot down by a thunderbolt now.....

God, what a hussy! Your poor parents must be mortified. As PL suggests, maybe leaving the child at home would be best. They could always pretent a few years down the line that they were infertile and had adopted an older baby iyswim? But obviously only if she won't entertain the idea of wearing a colour other than white.

Me to. Especially after 5 lovers, it's such a relief to us all. Mum was really worried and poor dad well we don't talk about that.

oh really, do you girls have nothing better to do than stir up trouble in the wedding forum with your petty unbelievable posts?????

I think you have a very valid point here. I'm taking notes so mum can look at your advice later when I give her my daily telephone call. We didn't have children at our wedding, I mean noone we know has children (except my sister now ?) so we didn't have that problem.

It's the white dress that is bugging me though, I wonder if any wedding mags say white is so 1990's and another colour is the way forward...

Well, I for one am really shocked at the content of some of these posts.

I never would have believed I'd read such things on Hitched as I have today.

The idea of a 23 year old mother having the nerve to wear white on her wedding day, it's terrible, it really is.

She should be wearing lilac, as another poster suggested.

SA. ?

This post is certain to stir up a hornets nest but if you did a straw pole of previous partners before finding H2B's you'd find that 5 is conservative.

as my grandmother would say; you have to try lots of frogs before you find your prince charming.

I cannot believe how youre treating your sister. Its awful, ok she may be a little more loose than others but come on..... white, its only a colour. Id had more boyfreinds than your sis and got wed in white. I know people did talk in muted tones behind my back as I walked up the aisle, but I was my choice.

Ah - this is a wind up......

Sorry bit slow.....

I really would tell her to keep the child out of it. It'll only get teased and left out at school if everyone knows it was born out of wedlock.

There are some lovely outfits for brides who are a bit shop-soiled and get married in the registry office so she can still feel special. It's a bit of a mockery getting married in church if you're not pure IMO and much worse if you don't attend regularly.

I agree, 5 lovers is quite unbelieveable. Not to mention downright dirty.

Right so lilac is the colour of choice? My mum will be pleased, it's one of her favourites. Sis can use some lavender perfume to ?

Lol penguin, i thought that as soon as i read it but wasn't sure....surely it has to be a wind up???

of course it is and hilarious the posts may be to read.... its no fair taking the piss outta the bridal nation!!! now go on, you lot, outta here before you reallllly upset someone ?

Well to be honest I think the original poster was lying about the number of partners her sister has had, no one has that many at the age of 23.

It smacks of exaggeration, tbh.

SA. ?

My granny's neighbour's son's friend knows someone similar to your sister and she wore white to her wedding and when she got to the altar she sponstaniously combusted.

Covered the guests in all sorts of goo and scared the life out fo the butterflies ?

Are you being serious?!?!

Must read the whole thread before replying. Ooops ?

?

[rofl] this is hilarious

Do you think she might be making it up? Oh mum will be pleased. Mind you 3 of the 5 mum has met through bingo, they work at the local Gala club. Sis and I take turns taking mum bingo, while dad is at the social club on a Mon and Weds night. I'm married you see, happily married and we waited before DTD, but the boys at Gala have a bit of a rep.. Sis started hanging about with them and well, we all know the rest. Thankfully the father of her child is a good Irish Catholic boy, although goodness knows what his parents think about the shame of a church wedding ☹️

KB3 what about this...

Women are being given controversial "virginity repair" operations on the NHS, it emerged last night.

Taxpayers funded 24 hymen replacement operations between 2005 and 2006, official figures revealed.

And increasing numbers of women are paying up to £4,000 in private clinics for the procedure apparently under pressure from future spouses or in-laws who believe they should be virgins on their wedding night.

and perhaps try and forget about it??

But then there's the child....hmmmmm

Lol! i'd have concerns about a man pushing for that op so he could "take" your virginity....eeeewwww gives me the heeby jeebies.

H2B and I were both virgins when we met ? and somehow all our previous girl/boy friend histories were magically erased!

maybe you could suggest that op to your sister to....ahem....tighten up after the baby....for me the sunroof is the best way of delivering! sure you have a scar but everything is still intact ?