How to 'nag' without 'nagging'? (a bit WP-y)

Well done you in losing the weight! That's fantastic!

My OH isn't quite so subtle or non-naggy as you would like - he tends to say things like "are you going to zumba tonight?/are you getting the treadmill out/when was the last time you went for a run" etc etc - though, to give him credit, my problem is literally just getting off my bum so the comments do give me that nudge to exercise!

What about a reward system? My OH offered to buy me two pairs of designer jeans if I'd lost the 1stone I planned on losing before the wedding (so far I have lost 2 lbs with 6 weeks to go!!!!)

Maybe telling him to man up would work? Or tell him that you are struggling and that with his support you could lose weight better together?

WW

I have posted a thread re weight as I am struggling but I have to say the idea of telling him you are struggling and need him to do it with you is perfect. As women we moan about our weight all the time at to be fair OH/BF's would never turn to us and tell us to man up for fear of upsetting us. Im sure weight issue affects men and their self confidence as much as it does ours

BTW well done for your loss.....I will use you as inspiration!

I am not very good at tact so probably not the best one to answer this. When he moans say , Look boy, you have been moaning about this for awhile now will you get off your bottom and do something about it. We can go to the gym together, we can run together, do slimming world together but you need to do something about this, I dont want your weight to ruin your enjoyment of our day and our honeymoon.

Well done on loosing the weight

Aw, thanks for all the nice comments! Still a way to go, but it's working so far and- my God- do I feel a million times better for it! ?

He's just like me (prob why we're getting married....duh!), in the sense that he's quite independent and would rather just get on with things all by himself, minimal fuss- I don't get on with weight-loss clubs and I like running cos I can put my headphones in and just ignore everything / everyone- so don't think he'd be up for exercising together. The diet thing is a pain in the a*se too, because he hardly eats any vegetables (I've tried introducing him to stuff and he'll just about eat peas and peppers).

I think I'll wait for the next time he brings it up and then gently point out to him that if he's really that concerned then he's the only one who can do anything about it! Might see if I can rope the best man in too to give him a nudge; he's more likely to listen to him than me.

Cheers for the tips!

Tell him! I would sit him down and tell him all that you have just said. I would say that you love him as is but if he isn't happy he has 2 options. He can do something about it (and you will help of course) or he can shut up about it.

Honesty is always the best policy. Act now before it is too late, if he leaves it any longer he will hate his wedding pics forever.

Oh and huge congrats on your weight loss. Pretty immense!

This is what l need to do with Mr Erin as he has started moaning about his weight but doesn't seem to want to do anything about it.

Like everyone else has said think it's a good idea to encourage him a gentle way and maybe suggest you do stuff together -go running, for a long walk etc.

My hubby gets quite competitive so could you use that as an edge? 'Oh well, I lost X amount in 3 months, you have 3 months left til the wedding bet you can't beat me' or something?

OH was exactly the same as yours. I lost almost a stone in time for our wedding, he had wanted to lose 2 or 3 and lost nada because he couldn't be bothered. It definitely didn't ruin his enjoyment of our day or honeymoon, so maybe if he won't motivate himself just leave it completely.

Well done! I always admire other people's will power when it comes to losing weight. Anyway... this might not work for you but I'll share t anyway. OH hates his job, but would never do anything about it when I suggested looking. After a couple of years I'd had enough so basically wverytime he mentioned it I said I wasn't listening to him winging while he wasn't doing anything about it. End of moan. But now he's just got to pass his course exams to be a fitness instructor and he will be put of the factory. And when he has a hard day, he now gets my sympathy and tea and biscuits :-) good luck! It would be easier if you both did it as you can mange meals easier, find an exercise you can do together too, even if its just a weekend walk.

Sorry for typing my phone is pants!

If I were you, as suggested, I would say next time he brings it up that he either does something about it (and you will support him 100%) or he stops moaning. If he is motivated he will do it himself. My H2B has lost over 2 stone and a lot of inches for the wedding, he has trained in the gym 6 days a week, cut down his alcohol consumption and eaten really well. He didn't want to look back on the wedding pictures with regret and wanted to look at his absolute best to marry me. I'm so proud of him.

Congratulations on your weight loss! Thats incredible. I am not sure how to help with your man, but can completely emphasize. My man is the same and wanted to lose weight for the wedding, but didn't. He has spent the months since still unhappy at his weight, and so I havemade times for us to go out for long walks etc, but I'm lucky in that my size always stays around the same, and OH finds it so unfair. All you can really do is keep encouraging him and reminding him of those spare few minutes to be active to help slim down slightly if thats what he'd like.

Thanks everyone. We both went out for a run last night, not together, but at least we both went out! He was really pleased when he got home- had in his mind to go x distance, and ended up running almost double. I made sure I gave him lots of praise and encouragement (it's like training a dog / child!) so hopefully he'll be more motivated to go again. As long as the stupid WEATHER holds out.....!

Just wanted to pop in and say well done for the weight loss! You've done amazingly.

Can your OH not see how well you've done and how you're probably happier about this? He might be nervious about the prospect of weight loss as it is hard (as you'll know) but it'll be so worth it in the end. Whenever I'm on a health boost or want to lose a little bit of weight so my clothes aren't so tight I always find the first 2-4 weeks the hardest.

I'm sure others have said (sorry, on the last bit of my lunch break so couldn't read all the replies) that it might be worth trying to rope him in to whatever you're doing. Cook him the same food, lunches etc. Go for a walk together etc etc.

Hope he gets the boot up his bum he needs to be happier with his weight soon.

Oh and if all else fails and you have a small amount of time to lose weight in try the Dukan diet.

Over the span of about a year my mum lost 7 stones. It's a strict diet but she's so used to it now that she knows what she can and can't eat.

Worked wonders for my sister too who wanted to lose weight for her wedding last year.