How would you handle this...

If you alter the others and leave the one you don't think needs it, would you be able to tell one is more fitted than the other?

If it was me then I would pay for the alterations but only what I think needed it. If the bridesmaid without alterations makes a fuss tell her you don't have enough money left to alter it especially after you don't think it needs done. If she still has a problem then ask her to pay for it herself.

They were worrying about their weight and I basically had to purchase bridal store dresses so I knew they could be altered (i.e. when they lost the weight they wanted to lose), and use that as the hook to get them to the fitting!

Yes, of course, I just don't want to end up in debt (its going to have to go on a credit card).

£50 alteration each is £250 to me, £50 to them, do you see where I'm coming from? I know its bad, I'm just trying to think of ways to do damage limitation!

Are they lace up backs?

How well/badly do they fit currently?

Not lace ups, just zips.

Not sure - we pick them up at the weekend.

They are all talking about alterations though so they are expecting them to be fitted to them.

No-ones mentioned how much, I presume they think think I'm covering it.

If being altered - should they all be the same length as well?

I have varying heights with my BMs!

I would like to say I would get them to pay for alterations, but I think if it came down to it I would feel too bad to ask them pay. Why didn't you wait until they had lost the weight they wanted to before purchasing the dresses? I'm getting married next July but waiting until next year to buy my BM dresses as one of them wants to lose a stone first. Just saves me from having to go through what you are going through.

I think it would be out of order to ask them to pay for them - sorry if that sounds harsh but alterations are usually expected in BM dresses so should be accounted for in the budget. I realise it's a bit late for that but, bear in mind these ladies have all their own money worries too and you'd have to have a 'one for all' solution. Can you borrow the money off someone and pay it back slowly over a few months after the wedding? Or how about asking them to pay as their gift to you?

Have you shopped around for alteration costs? When I was a bridesmaid for my friend she asked us to sort out our own alterations with someone near us as we all lived around the country but she paid us back the costs. My dress was practically remade by my seamstress but only cost £30, one of the other bridesmaids had to have hers taken in and it cost over £100 with whoever she went with. Needless to say the bride was a bit peed off with her for going with this when she knew how cheaply I'd gotten mine done for!

Well they may not even need altering?

If they mention alterations again, maybe say something along the lines of 'it'll be great if they fit straight away - we might not even need to get them altered'.

Agree with the others re shopping around for alteration costs.

How likely are they to need major alterations? As in, were they ordered according to their measurements at the time and have any of them changed size?

They had to be ordered 3 months before our wedding date, I waited as late as I could.

Thanks, I appreciate the honest feedback.

No they didn't, I've paid for everything else.

Not shopped around - I don't know if I have time to now

Most places will need a few weeks and I'm away this weekend so struggling to find time to be involved in the 'price up' of what needs done as it is :-(

Fingers crossed!

One of them needs chest work - I don't mind as that can't be helped.

I don't really think any of them have changed that much shape, maybe 2 of them, but I think thats about it.

I don't know if they were in between sizes etc though.

We are having high street dresses (made for 5ft9) and I have a 5ft2 bridesmaid, she is the only person that has already bought her dress (letting them get their own and sending money). On buying her dress she let me know it was far too long but she'd get it altered, it doesn't necessarily have to cost £50, have a look for a seamstress in yout area (even a friend who can sew... and can do a good job of it) a lot of markets have stalls that will alter that sort of thing a lot cheaper, you could maybe get all dresses done for £50, if thats the case its acceptable to expect them to pay for their own really, or its not too much from your pocket

Excuse my ignorance - but how can I shop around? I did ring one but they said it depends on the dress, what needs done etc.

Should I make them all try them on, note down what I think is needed, then ring around based on that?

Sorry, I know this is probably really obvious.

I think I'm panicking as no time! Its not like I can go around them all with the dress as I'm not here this weekend (and next weekend is only 2 weeks till the wedding!).

Depending on how much it ends up costing, could you ask them to go 50/50 with you? If it's worded correctly and they are good friends, I'm sure they would be happy with the compromise - especially if everything else is being covered by you.

I bought high street dresses reduced to £50. I knew all/some would need alterations as different shaped girls so said each could be altered as needed and i'd pay. So they will be paying for their shoes which they chose and got for £35. That will prob be same as alterations. Can you ask them to pay for something else you've budgeted for which they can keep? I will buy them earrings as gifts and bought hair flowers from Claire's. You can find ways to make the amount you've got work.

Its too late - everything else is paid for now. Dress, shoes, hair, make up, jewels, flowers, etc!

How would I handle it? Honestly, with 25 days left, being the laziest person in the world and also not wanting to ask my BMs to pay for anything, I'd just get them done. What's £250 in the grand scheme of things? But the price (which incidentally sounds a little on the high side for some basic bust/waist work) is worth your peace of mind? And remember: there is a difference between altering (nipping the bust in) and "fitting" (where there isn't anything major wrong, it's just a centimetre for a centimetre's sake). Only concede the former.

Good way to look at it!

Thanks.

I definitely think you should pay. Also, you can pay off your card with money you get from guests!