Hubby to be and I have different opinions - how do we compromise?

I can totally get that he wants to show he can support you but it is also traditional for the brides family to pay. Could you not maybe go from this angle?

I don't get his viewpoint at all, how does having a 'nice' ceremony demonstrate he can support you?

I would get him to accept your dads generous gift.

We've had a lot of these types of 'stop' decisions and we've learnt to negotiate and compromise. It's been difficult but we've got through it. If nothing else, wedding planning can make you great at negotiating and compromising and, this may be the first but I can guarantee it will not be the last!

I can see both your points - we had something similar and we ended up weighing up the pros and cons and alternatives and compromising.

In my humble opinion, I would suggest to meet half way. Defer the wedding for 1 year, save half and then accept half your Dad's money. That way, he's still supporting you and you still get the 'nice' ceremony you want. If he absolutely cannot accept ANY of your Dad's money, perhaps he would accept a loan that you can pay your Dad back or even get a bank loan? Again for only some portion of the cost...

I know it's the norm for the Brides family to pay but as lots of couples are now paying for it themselves, I can see why he'd rather provide for you and your son and it could be a really important factor for him.

We've been the opposite - OH suggested quite a few times just going to the registry office and paying for an intimate family meal afterwards, just so we could be married and plus it would save money meaning we could get married sooner. In the end, OH realised he'd regret certain family members not being there so decided we'd go for the bigger wedding (but still not huge) but it has meant we'll have been engaged 3 years by the time we get married. I like the compromise idea above, that way everyone is happy ? I would happily have gone for a more extravagant wedding but OH really wants to get a deposit together for a house, so we're cutting back so we still have spare to save for that as well.