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Beginner June 2009

I can't cope, had enough, I QUIT!!!!!!

Fancy Fayre, 25 June, 2009 at 15:36 Posted on Planning 0 6

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Sorry girls (and guys) Just need to rant before I explode!!!
U might want to get a cuppa this is gonna be long!

so 2 weeks ago we asked h2b's lad (not his son but ex girlfriends and they get on well) who he was bringing to the daytime he said his friend, so we went and gave final numbers to our venue and paid, 3 days later he texted to say his friend cant get the day off work, he BLEEP BLEEP knew we had already booked and paid for everything!!
Then he asked his sister (Same Dad) and she said yes, he texted again last NIGHT to tell us she has an exam on the morning of the wedding so she can't make it BUT I can bring my brother (Mum's side) he's already booked the day off!

Now my h2b cant stand him because when his grandad was dying he didnt have time to even go see him for 5 minutes, Completely understandably he said no (In the nicest possible way)

So Now h2b has invited his INTERFeckinMATE who he speaks to all the time TO OUR BLEEPING WEDDING DAY!!!!!!!
I have at least 5 people who we both know who would love to come to our daytime, did he consider them NO!!! F"CKER

All the wedding planning has been done by me, I'm sure u remember my buttonhole rant (His mum chopped one to make a bud instead of a full flower) He has now decided that he wants all the guys flowers the same or they will look odd, No SH1T Sherlock!!!!!
But they will not match the rest of the flowers for the day and he doesn't get it at all so they will look like a55holes (Hopefully)

I had to endure the photoshoot and as I told him i would I LOOK LIKE A T*AT,is he bothered, NO!!!!

He picked the cake up from Herts (Were on the wirral) got it all the way to his mum's driving carefully down the motorway and A roads, then dropped it!!!!!

I spent my day off (My kids went to thier dads) Making 180 chocolates, we went to see his dad for fathers day and he said (and I quote) "we spent all day making chocolates" I said yes WE did didn't WE then I completely flipped out and screamed at him in front of his parents and told him I'm not standing for it.
We made upon the monday then last night he said we don't have enough money to pay for everything after I'd bought a bottle of vodka!
We were £300 short 3 weeks ago I managed to get £100 by not paying bills then last week his dad gave him £1000, WTF why have we now got no money!!!!!!
My Vodka definately didn't cost £800 it was only £7.99.
Now he's made me promise not to drink on the day of the wedding at all cos he doesn't want to marry me when I'm pissed, I very rarely drink and never actually manage to get drunk.

So again we had a screaming match(last night) among other things he said oh well lets f*ck it all off and I'll move out, I didn't respond I just turned my back and went to sleep (eventually) this morning he was complaining that I kept him up all night cos I'd been talking in my sleep and grinding my teeth (which I do when I'm stressed) then told me he needed me to iron him a shirt and a coffee would be great!
I'm sorry but did he forget what he said or is he just to fecking stupid to realise how hard this is for me, I have 4 kids to see to aswell as planning a wedding and looking after him!

The icing on the cake has just arrived!
My Cbm cant make my hen night and my daughter (who is giving me away) cant either cos shes camping with her mates, I've been planning this for 18 months and now 4 days before the sh1t hits the fan, to top it all off I'm bleeding like a stuck pig and I'm on the injection so I dont have periods!

I'll probably delete this in 5 minutes when I've calmed down and add something fluffy lol

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6 replies

Latest activity by cotteesgirl, 26 June, 2009 at 12:58

Beginner August 2009
bluewater · 25 June, 2009 at 16:30
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Wow, not sure what to say. the first thing i'd be looking to find out about, is the money issue - where has £1k gone in such a short space of time? that's pretty serious in my eyes.

i'd want answers to that, before anything else, sharpish. never mind anything that was said in the heat of the moment, you need to be able to work through money issues sensibly and trust each other with such important stuff.

and as for the cake - you can get another. hen night - sod them (how long ago did you arrange it?). buttonholes - such a small issue, let.it.go.

and try to caaaaaaaaaaaalm down, this can't be doing you any good.

x
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Beginner August 2008
tempting-propositions · 25 June, 2009 at 16:51
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Hi, thought I'd reply, didn't want to read and run. I wasn't sure at first who you are angry with the step son, or your H2b, thought I think it's both. You sound very stressed, the main thins is to try and calm down and decide exactly what your problems are.

As Bluewater said, you need to find out where the £1000 went. it also sounds liek you need to ahve a chat with H2B to tell him why you're upsety and angry, and to ask him not to treat you like a slave.

The last few days before the wedding are so hard, my H2B went to pieces, and I did absolutley everything in the build up, as he was just a gibbering wreck for some reason!

Try to talk, this is ment to be your day (as a couple) try not to let others get in the way.

By the way, had to say, I love your dogs in the avatar, I have a 7 year old greyhound myself.

Michele

x
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Beginner July 2009
moomin8804 · 25 June, 2009 at 16:51
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Didn't want to read and run!

I agree with bluewater, you need to address the missing money issue asap. The other stuff i think is just wedding nerves and stress which will calm down after the big day i'm sure!

You can't do anything about the guests so let it go, concentrate on you and your OH getting married, because that's all that matters at the end of the day. Even if he is getting on your wick at the moment, everything that was said in anger will be forgotten on the day!
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Beginner August 2010
Houdini · 25 June, 2009 at 17:32
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And... Breathe... You need to sort out whats important and whats not. Everything is probably amplified 10 times because of how close its getting and thats understandable.

Yeah, I'd be miffed about H2B inviting someone else without, it seems, consulting you. But if he wants him there is that really such a big deal? I understand there's other people you may want there as a preference to this other person but he's obviously close to your H2B and it's only one person... Especially as it's already been paid for, someone may as well fill the space.

Same goes with the chocolates. But I'd have probably given a swift jab in the ribs with my elbow and made a 'serious joke' out of it. Like, excuse me, who spent the day making chocolates??

Agree with BW, cake can be salvaged and if people can't make the hen night then that's their problem and them that's missing out. It's a little insensitive so close to the day but it's out of your control so let it go.

Also, I'd be finding out where the money went as £1,000 is a lot of money in my mind and I'd want to know whereabouts he's spending money like that in such a short space of time.

I don't mean to trivialise any of your problems, just trying to give a calm outside view. Hope you get things sorted but feel free to rant on here if you need to. x
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Beginner June 2009
Fancy Fayre · 25 June, 2009 at 17:50
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Thanks everyone xx

He's now got a migrane so we all have to be nice!

F*CK THAT, I'm off

I hope you all have a fantastic wedding day and live long and happy lives together

Jennie xxzx
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Beginner November 2009
MrsMcB2B · 25 June, 2009 at 19:19
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Crikey!

Do you want to marry him? Sounds like you can't stand the sight of him just now (whether it's down to his behaviour or not).
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Beginner September 2009
cotteesgirl · 26 June, 2009 at 12:58
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Men! will never be able to work them out or why actually we cant live without them (when truth be told we actually could!). dont know what to say, ive lost count of the amount of times i have nearly cancelled wedding because *at the time* OH annoyed/upset/aggrevated me not just once but several times over a few days.... but in the cold light of day i know i love him so much and he is there with me.

Excuse me for saying this, but i wonder if its because we are a bit 'older' (im 36) and for certain i know my life would be so much easier without my OH, i know i can cope on my own financially and im really independent so its very easy for me to become inpatient and i never used to be like this years ago. Not saying its right or wrong for him to be like he is, but you love him for a reason, agreed to spend the rest of your life with him for a reason etc and im sure the good points outweigh the bad points (if they dont then you maybe in trouble lol!)...but trust me your OH and my OH sound like they would have alot in common if they met! so youre not alone hun! chin up chick x
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