I don't understand how a hospital can 'work' this way? Major whinge alert.

That's just made me cry. How bloody awful for you all ?

I wish I had something constructive to say.

Thats awful and totally unacceptable. Its made me really sad ?

? hopefully he is more comfortable now.

KJX, how utterly heartbreaking. I don't understand how a hospital can operate like that either, its despicable.

Thank goodness your grandad has a loving family around him ?

That's awful, it must be so upsetting for your family. I can understand you worries, have to say it brings back memories. For some reason care of elderly patients is often so bad. I hope they manage to get their acts together and give him some proper care. Poor grandad.

The poor man, that is absolutely dispicable, he should be treated so much better. I'm a bit reactionary when it comes to raising complaints but tbh I'd be putting the contents of your post in a recorded letter to the PCT with a copy to CQC. I understand how under resourced hospitals can be, but equally have seen how productive complaints to CQC can be. It's not something we should have to do, but I have seen it work.

? I'm sorry he and you & your family are having to go through this

That is absolutely horrendous and have made me cry. I would seriously make an official complaint.

Your poor grandad that's really awful. It sounds as though there is little in the way of organisation or communication going on there and whilst i've no doubt the doctors and nurses are trying to do their level best to care for the patients if they don't know who is where, what they are in for and what their individual needs are surely they're working in the dark and that's how patients get missed.

I really hope things improve and/or your grandad is moved to the hospice where hopefully things will be a little more organised and the care a bit more consistent as a result.

I feel for you really I do, I remember clearly visiting my grandmother in hospital when she was getting increasingly frail. The care was excellent and she was being well looked after but even still she suddenly seemed so vulnerable and it was a difficult thing to take in ?

As a nurse, I feel totally and utterly sick for you. His treatment has been dispicable and I would be putting in a massive complaint if I were you. I would speak to the ward manager, modern matron for the area, consultant and be writing to hte Chief exec also. That level of 'care' is not acceptable.

Hoping your grandad is feeling more comfortable x

I'm so sad to read this KJX, your poor grandad. What a sorry state of affairs. I really hope they can get themselves sorted and allow your grandad to live out the rest of his life with proper care and dignity.

Thanks all - I tried to contact PALS, but there is no one there till Monday. We are on to the hospice as well, they have said they will give him the next bed available.

How utterly appalling, your poor grandad and poor you and your mum having to see him go through that. If you feel up to it I do think you should complain formally, the people at the top need to know that this sort of thing is still going on (my nan died about 16 years ago but my mum made similar complaints then about the hospital).

I hope that he is treated better and is more comfortable now ?

Its a sin. a true sin that people of that generation have to suffer such indignity. I feel so passionately about it. My 90 year old gran is currently in hospital with bladder cancer and she too doesnt have long left and we have had very similar issues. THe worst thing that happened to us was her having to walk her own drip to another bed cos her auxiliary had to push the bed. wtf.

not to detract from your issues. hope he gets some comfort soon. and yes, defo complain. it might not have an effect but it may well do. god, i am so sad reading your post. xx

?

No, I can't understand it either, and yet, I know from first hand also that such lack of organisation and basic care exists. The hospital that my dad died in was similarly chaotic. I will never forgive the nurses who, less than 2 weeks before he died, instructed him to 'get himself to the toilet' when he said he needed help. This resulted in an incident when my poor dad, with diarrhea running down his legs, had to hobble down the corridor, clutching the walls, completely unassisted whilst they sat chatting. ?

I'm not a knocker of the NHS, on the contrary I am a big fan. My son has very recently received fabulous care and actually my dad had previously received amazing medical care on two seperate occasions (and in 2 different hospitals) for which I will always be grateful. But I find it so sad that, through bad luck, some patients have to suffer horrendous treatment on wards that are disorganised and clearly lacking in decent management. And, yes, communication always appears to be central to this.

I feel so sad for what your family are going through right now.

xxx

Your story sounds all too familiar, we've had issues with care both for my father (oseophageal cancer) and my late aunt (multiple cancers).

With my aunt we were told she had died when she hadn't, they had her in her bed with the sheet over her face waiting for the porters to take her to the morgue, it was only when my mum held her hand to say goodbye that she noticed her twitch and was warm, this we were told was normal after death. She wasn't dead and lasted a further day after this, during which time there was always a member of staff with her, such was the stink my mum kicked up about it.

My dad visited his consultant for a routine appointment and scan to be told he was still clear, he could feel a lump in his throat but it was dismissed. 3 days later he couldn't swallow and saw a different doctor who asked him what treatment he was receiving for the the cancer which had returned. He's been left without food for 2 days, as he requires his mushed quite often and 'there aren't the staff' to mash his dinner and 'thats what relatives should do'. Which obviously isn't a problem except there is no visiting over lunch. He has also had pneumonia missed and told to not be melodramatic about breathing problems. He collapsed the following day and was only saved from dying at home because a neighbour resusscitated him. It still took 3 days after this to get the antibiotics for him.

I think the NHS are fantastic but it seems to be that the basic care that makes life bearable for people suffering humiliating debilitating conditions needs some input so it may properly support the amazing surgical procedures and ground breaking things the doctors do.

I hope the hospice bed comes through for your grandad soon. My FiL spent his last few weeks in one (also bladder cancer) and he was so happy, the nurses and doctors had time and patience with him and supported him to do what he was able whilst making sure all his needs were met. There was also none of the tv cards to pay for! I hope his final days are as comfortable and pain free as my FiL's were.

I'm so sorry your poor Grandad has been treated in this way. I was going to suggest PALS too.

We had issues when my Grandma was in hospital. She had dementia which was pretty advanced so couldn't care for herself. It was amazing that once I made the staff aware that I was a nurse the quality of care improved and they started to answer questions!!

One practical bit of advice re the TV cards though, I assume they are Patientline/Hopedia units. If so when you register the card you get an individual telephone number. When you move beds you call the call centre and they transfer all of the credit and the number to the new bed. I would ring them and explain what has happened and they should do something. I think OAP's and terminal patients used to get free TV although this may have changed and it might just be reduced fees. I would ask them.

I really hope you get some answers and that your poor Grandad gets the care he needs and deserves.

x

In lieu of PALS not being there until Monday I would ring and ask to be put through to the matron covering the ward that he is a patient on or the site manager.

Most of the things you have written are totally unacceptable and if they are happening to him they will be happening to other people too.

KJK. You must report this ASAP, in verbal & written complaint.

The standard of care he has recieved is below the expected standard & shows the lack of organisation on that ward. It is a serious issue & the fact he has a Terminal condition is no reason to overlook his current needs. His basic medical needs are not being given.

I do hope that this hospital is not a BHR Trust one.

Wishing you Grandad, get out of there quick vibes & hope that the hospice has a bed soon so he can get given the care & dignity he so deserves.

Unutterably dreadful. As Ruth G says shout from the rooftops and copy everyone in. You shouldn't have to be dealing with complaints at a time like this, but it is probably important for you to do it. Wishing you, your Grandad and your family lots of strength.

KJX this is not acceptable care. Although you need to write this formally in a letter going through the correct procedures you need to do something NOW for your grandfather. Today.

Firstly write what you have written here calmly and factually down. Use bullet points and names, times etc as much as possible.

You then need to call the ward and tell them you wish to have a meeting today with the ward matron as you have concerns for his care. In my opinion they will give you that meeting as they are very keen to try and sort complaints at the first level. When you have the meeting try and stay calm and factual, as upsetting as this is for you don't let your emotions run away with you.

You need to find out

1) What consultant he is under?

2) Do they have a ward round? If so when is it and who will be seeing him?

3) Who is his named nurse? Tell them calmly that you wish to only speak to this person when you call the ward to enquire about how he is. I would then phone the ward a couple of times a day to enquire how he is, what he is eating, has there been any change in his medication and treatment.

4) What are the immediate plans for his care. Ask to see a care plan. Ask what tests etc he will be having in the next day or so. What do those involve for him? When will he be having those.

We have a saying that 'the squeaky wheel always gets the oil'. In this instance you have to be the squeaky wheel. It is no good IMO complaining later you do need to do something now. As long as you remain calm and polite (as hard as that may be ? ) I'm sure you will find they will bend over backwards to help you.

Nothing constructive to add, but wanted to say how very sorry to hear that this is the level of 'care' experienced.

I hope your Grandad is as comfortable as possible ?

How horrible. I think WodgerWoo is right about being the squeaky wheel. In my (very limited) experience of working on a geriatric ward it was certainly the case. And I'm saddened but a long way off being surprised about the "care" he's received.

Thanks all for your suggestions and good wishes - and I'm really sorry to hear similar stories from people. It shouldn't be this way.

However - things have improved. My mum had a meeting with the nurse in charge of the ward and someone senior enough to be "wearing a really nice pair of shoes" with their suit. Mum took with her my Dad and a document I had pulled together. The document contained a list of all the issues we had encountered, comments on how this issue had impacted on Grandad Pete and where we could, a suggestion of how this could be resolved / prevented from happening again. The document was copied, in a formal letter, to PALS and to Mr John Wilderspin (the chief exec of the PCT - there were issues with communication / information sharing between the GP / District Nursing Team and the hospital) and Marianne Griffiths (the chief exc of the Hospitals Trust).

We will see what happens - the care has certainly been better since Saturday evening, but that may just be the shifts involved.

Gosh. I am so so sorry. This is the absolutely unacceptable pits. I cannot believe what i am reading. I mean i can - but i am shocked to the core.

I hope that he immediately gets the care and treatment he deserves and needs.

What a dreadful situation. I think you should complain to the very top about it.

Heaps of love to you and your family at what must be a hugely stresseful and upsetting time. x

How awful for your Grandad and your family, there is no excuse for such poor care. As someone said earlier it seems that older people in hospitals do not always receive the level of care they should. I work on a busy Elderly Care unit where staffing levels are shocking and the management is terrible. However the nurses and HCA's work tirerlessly and I can honestly say that i have never witnessed anything like your Grandad has been subjected to.

Are any of you able to stay in with your Grandad. I know it's not standard practice but we allow it when relatives are worried or patients would quite clearly benefit from having a relative with them.

I hope your Grandad is more comfortable.

Gem x

I am so so sorry your poor grandfather is being treated this way. It is completely unacceptable, and your grandad deserves so much better. All i can say is get in touch with the PALS service, and make a complaint. My family have been in a similar situtation and you have my deepest sympathy.

I really hope your grandad doesn't suffer more because of their incompetence. xxx

I am so so sorry for how your grandad has been treated. We had similar with my gran in law and made a complaint, and made sure the ward knew - we never received a reply re the complaint, but the fact that her new ward knew that there was a complaint against her old ward did mean they treated her a lot better. Which is wrong on a whole lot of levels but it was better for her.

Those TV cards are a licence to print money. I have heard of so many people getting moved and cards getting lost. There must be millions of pounds wasted on them every year.

I hope things improve and your grandad gets to spend his final days in comfort and dignity, and that you and your mum get to spend time being with him and saying goodbye, not tearing your hair out fighting the system.

?

I'm very nearly stuck for words. I really can't believe how appallingly your grandad has been treated. I'm glad things have improved a bit (albeit only because you made it happen).

Your grandad's very lucky to have you and your mum, I dread to think what happens to people who are alone.

I'm glad that the care has improved, your grandad is very lucky to have his family around him.

My fingers are crossed for a hospice place for him soon, they are amazing places