I think I might have an eating disorder

Hi, Im posting here on my anon login too but I want you to know Im EXACTLY the same. If you search my previous posts you will see I have posted about it all before. I cant sleep at night because of it, I hate myself for doing it. I havnt weighed myself since the dr did it (when I was 9mos pregnant) but my BMI must be around 50 now.

Long and short of it is, I went to see my dr about a month ago. She gave me some anti-depressants to help... some have been proven to reduce binging... havnt noticed it working so far but Im definatly finding the rest of life alot easier. I have had some counselling also and Ive been referred to the eating disorders unit, Im just waiting to hear from them, but I need to sort this out as i cant carry on like this or else Ill be dead at 50.

If you want to email or pm let me know and Ill give you my email address as my pm on here dosnt work(it just goes to my old work address)

btw once I have sorted out the issues in my head as to why I eat and binge, then I will probably have a lapband done. I spoke to my counsellor about having it done sooner, she reckons it just wont work until I have identified why I do this and change my behaviours otherwise Ill cheat the band or develop another addiction.

Hi

My biggest piece of advice to you would be to go and speak to your doctor before it gets to the being sick stage. I have been a binge eater for the past few years and it came to a head in January this year when I started making myself sick. It was then I knew I had a problem.

I went to the doctors and I was referred to a counsellor and to an Eating Disorders clinic. TBH I have only heard from the counsellor to tell me I am on a waiting list but I have been to an inital appointment with the ED clinic.

If you cant speak to your doctor, write down what you want to say and hand it to him/her (this is what I did). I have never admitted it to anyone before (well except hitched!) but telling the doctor gave me the courage to tell my husband and a few close friends IRL.

I cant say I am cured by any means, I still binge (this weekend was a big disaster for me) but I do think a bit more about what I am putting in my mouth and try and think why I feel like this. Is it something that triggers yours off, lonely, bored, upset??

Sorry this is long but please feel free to pm if you like (this is my real loggin) Also I found the beat forums helpful (they are a bit teenage like but it helps to "talk" to someone in your situation)

Take care Sam x

Yes, I just wrote it all down too, I coudlnt actually say it. I still havnt told my h although he kind of knows but I havnt told him in as many words. I have done it as long as I can remember (even at nursery school I remember doing it and all through primary and secondary school) and I have never ever once made myself sick.

I can't believe how similar our stories are somuchtodo.

I am being treated for post natal depression at the moment with the same anti-depressant that you have been prescribed. I have been on it for about 10 weeks now and it has had no effect on my binging. I have not told my doctor about what I eat though, he only knows about my PND.

I have also been referred for counselling for my PND, confidence issues and some things that have happened in my past.

The binging has been going on since before I was pregnant. I didn't do it so much when I was pregnant though because I didn't want to harm my baby.

Thank you for sharing your post with me.

How old is your baby?? Could you mention it to your consellor instead?

I think the worst thing is that I DID do it when I was pregnant (I literally just couldnt stop myself) and developed gestational diabetes. I couldnt keep to the GD diet, its like I have a compulsion to eat. My baby ended up in special care and it was all my fault?

I haven't seen my counsellor yet, I am still waiting for my appointment. Baby is 7 months. I have an appointment in a couple of weeks to see my doctor but I am not sure I can actually say the words. I am so ashamed of myself. I am not a stable person for my child to have around.

You shouldn't blame yourself. I know that you wouldn't have been able to control it. ?