I'm sitting in work in email discussions with OH regarding "putting planning on hold" for our wedding. As it is it's quite late and we don't have much planned (got food and a venue but no dress or anything else with 3 months to go), but I can't bring myself to plan a wedding if I can't see it happening.
The problem I'm having is with his drinking. He's been off sick lately since his foot is bandaged up and unusable. On top of this his brother got himself into some trouble and has moved in with us (my suggestion). This is all fine but now he's drinking out of boredom during the day and every night with his brother (whose trouble happened to involve too much drink so not a great example being set). When he drinks he gets over-emotional and easily angered. Now he never has and never will lay a hand on me but the barbed comments and lashing out verbally has gone past breaking point.
In my friends I always say get away from any kind of abuse, even just the odd verbal lashing out. But being in the relationship in question, I know what a great partner he is and how we've supported each other through good and bad. He knows the worst and best of me and vice versa. Everyone knows him as a great, loving, friendly guy which he is.
It's taken me 15 years of dating to find the guy I really get and who gets me and that is good enough to marry (I've held high standards). I know a part of me is still picking things apart with the relationship but when it comes to this he's hurt me too much and I need to start looking after myself. He has already said he's drinking out of boredom and he didn't realise it was affecting me this much and he'll stop immediately and even go speak to someone. I don't think it will change (well, it will for a few months then we're married and maybe we have kids and then it's too late).
Aaaargh!!!!!!! Sorry for the rant. Can't really discuss this with anyone else. I know you'll all probably say to get out of it, I just don't know.
