Is anyone else doing this second time round like me?

Yes we are both second time around. I am not big on weddings but OH wanted to have a proper wedding and show everyone our commitment and I am glad now . People have talked about his ex wife in front of me ALOT but not in a good way ! But either way I don't want to hear it. I am not the mother of his children and I feel sometimes I am not going to be the " real " wife because of this. Maybe my paranoia though ? I do think alot of reassurance is needed second time around. I do think people's attitudes are different second time around. But I feel so lucky to have found this wonderful man and I can't wait to be his wife, this is it , the one , the love of my life ! lol

Oldgal its second time round for both HTB and me and I totally understand what you mean. We have 3 children between us and they all live with us. We won't be having any together and I know exactly what you mean about not feeling like the real wife but we will both be real wives in the same way they will be our real husbands so don't worry!

xxxx

Yes, 2nd time around here too.

I was pretty young before, and my ex was younger still. Carmen is great with my 2 children, and both families have been great from the start.

I get on fine with my ex, and there are no problems between her and Carmen.

Second time for me too but first time for my OH.

I have two boys which he spoils rotton and his family have excepted with open arms.

I'm loving all this planning and arranging as 1st time around I got married abroad and we just booked it and turned up. They wern't very big on wedding planners 18 years ago, , ,?

xx

Its the second time round for both me and OH, i'm finding it really exciting as weddings are in many ways so different than when i got married the first time (19 years ago) Both family and friends are happy for us and are just as excited. I think I am much more relaxied this time round, we know exactly what we want for Our Day and just want to celebrate with everyone.

Second time for me, first for OH. I was 26 first time......lasted 11months?

I call the first time my practice run.........this one will be a joint effort and I will have what I want ( within reason). I am so much more excited this time. My first husband was very negative about everything I liked and wanted to do it has cheap as possible.

I will be 37 second time round.

Second time for me, I was married at 25, divorced at 28

I'm now 32 and (hopefully) older and wiser. I knew I shouldn't have got married before,my last thought before going in was 'hey, you can always get a divorce' ?

I'm sure there will be some comparisons drawn among my extended family but I don't care, last time I kind of got dragged along with the whole thing and it was a huge circus but, this time, in the words of Mr Sinatra 'I'll do it my way!' ?

Second time for me but first for my OH. Im loving all the planning as the first time around my mam was in charge (I was a very young 21 year old!) This time its all about what we want with no influences from anyone else?

It was for me as well.. i loved it 2nd time round as i could have more of what I wanted but also knew/remembered bits that I didnt feel were necessarily.. I would plan it all over again now as I absoultely loved the planning part.. :-D

Yes, I am, although for me this feels like the first time.

When I got married for the first time, at 22, in 1995, I had lived in the UK for only a few months and my then-MIL organised everything, without even asking me what I'd like. I even received an invite to my own wedding! I am not moaning, because she paid for everything apart from my wedding dress which was made by my Mum who was a designer and dressmaker, but she could at least have asked me if I had any colour preference etc. My only bridesmaid was the 8 year-old daughter of my ex-MIL's neighbour who had been a BM at another wedding and "wanted to wear her dress again". I only met her a week before the wedding. The reception was a bufett at my ex-MIL's house and we spent our wedding night at her house too, after helping her wash the dishes etc. No dancing at all. Only "tasteful" classical music in the background and a lot of people I didn't know. Apart from my Mum, one friend of mine also married in the UK and the neighbours i didn't know anyone. 80% of the guests were over 65, friends of hers.

We fortunately divorced in 2006 - I say fortunately because otherwise I would have never met my wonderful OH and wouldn't be here now. This time round I am really enjoying real wedding planning and it feels like it's the first time.

It is the first time for my OH though.

My Mum feels exactly like me, as if now it's the first time.

I'm a second time bride and I am enjoying the whole wedding thing far more this time. My mum kinda took over first time, but this time My OH and I are in charge.

Someone said I was 'second-hand bride' the other day, and I told her I found that a little offensive and that the first time was just a practice run.

This is my 3rd time. my first I was 19 with a baby, registry office on top of a car park and then buffet at my mums. £8 dress from miss selfridge.

My 2nd we got married in vegas, just the 2 of us, came back and had a party. It lasted 6years.

I wasnt all that fussed about getting married again, didnt want to be a joan collins, but met my htb who has never married as he doesnt believe in it, until he met me!

It was his idea to marry, and he wanted a church wedding in the village he had lived most of his life, but the vicar refused, so we are getting married in a beautiful castle. I have a big white dress, which Ive not had before, Im looking forward to walking down the aisle, something else I,ve never done!

I feel very uncomfortable knowing this is my 3rd time, as though people think I dont take it seriously, but also I think that being older and having made mistakes, this marriage has got a better chance.

My htb says it doesnt worry him that hes my 3rd, we all have a past.

This is not the first time for me - I was a teenager, not ready for it at all. Lasted 10 months. OH has been married before - his lasted about 10 years. We always said never again - we were happy how we were - but we get married in June on our 9th anniversary. It just seems like the right time. I am having the whole Victorian thing that I never had the chance to plan before. REALLY enjoying planning it this time - apart from now I am a bity more grown up I know money doesn't grow on trees! xx

This is exactly the same for me! Its mad to think he's been through all this before but its a life time ago and never even enters my head (although it took 7 years to pluck up the courage to tell my parents this - the fact he's 12 years older and has 2 kids didn't go down to well so didn't know when to drop that one in!!)! Funnily enough, i found e-mail from when we'd been together about 2 weeks and I found out he'd been married before (not to the mother of his kids - thankfully he never married her) i said i couldn't be with him as i'd never be able to get married in church blah blah blah blah - 8 years later, we're 2 weeks away from getting married in a beautiful church with a lovely vicar who couldn't be happier to be marrying us and a family who love him and the kids to bits!

I don't think anyone has treated us any differently because he's been married before (not that its any of their business!) but i think people can tell when you are genuinely happy and will be happy for you whatever the history!

It has never entered my head about not being a 'real' wife cos i'm not the mother of his kids - i just love the fact we are finally officially becoming a family!

2nd time for me and OH too. Married for 10 years first time. We married in Cyprus with nobody with us so this time will be a bigger and more thought out affair!