Is it just me or does anyone else feel like this???

Well I'd never be any kind of "perfect wife" without major surgery anyway but no, you are not alone as I'm sure the subsequent replies will prove.

In our heads, we have many wonderful things planned to make our day the most wonderful for us both - but like you we see other people's flashes and ideas and think that they are so much better and if only we had the money, or if we'd thought of that, or whatever.

As long as it's the day that you and your partner to be want it to be, that's all that matters - if anyone else doesn't like your orange and lime green dress with purple flowers then that's their problem not yours. It would be very rare, and incredibly rude, of anyone to criticise any aspect of your special day openly.

You can't please all the people all the time, so as long as you please yourselves that's really all that matters.

Yep, that is me too! I think my 10 month old baby is more artistic than I will ever be. I'm completely paranoid that our wedding won't match up to OH's friends who have all spent a lot more on their weddings than us. I have decided to just do things that I/my OH both like & sod everybody else! It's our big day so that's all that matters. The HIB's on here are very helpful if you are struggling for inspiration. Just this morning Sherrie H has probably sorted my table centrepiece problem. All you need to do is decide what colour scheme/theme you are having & then most people are only too happy to share ideas with you. We can't all be artistic which is why there are so many wedding planners/florists/arty people on this forum ?

Sometimes I get a bit - ekkkk

I seem to be concentrating on smaller touches than the bigger things - like i want heart shaped crystals in my flowers not round ones! Things that no one else will notice but I will know & love...so I think a few months before hand I will have a meltdown about the bigger issues! lol

I think thats all you can do - pick stuff that is true to you, your OH and that way you gain confidence in your day because it is done your way?

Prob not much help! lol

Yes I do to be honest.

We are doing ours on a budget, and unlike practically everyone here, we are not bothered by venue! Obvs we don't want something really horrible, but we don't want a hotel, castle, manor house etc, so have plumped for a rather modest village hall. It is fit for purpose and we are going to decorate it ourselves. To us the main thing is that everyone is comfortable and has lots of food.

We are getting married in a registry office with a max capacity of 60, so we can't invite all of our guests to that bit. I am worried that the ones who don't get invited will be put out (even though they will otherwise be there for the whole day- food, speeches dancing etc).

We are not paying for a photographer either, as so many guests will take pictures. My uncle's hobby is photography so he will take some group pics outside the registry office, but my h2b has said he will pose for no longer than 10 minutes is total cos he hates posing for photos...

The food we will be doing is stew followed by wedding cake (chocolate) and ice cream.

Yes, we are doing things differently and I am sure some of the snootier members of the family will judge us, generally I don't care, but sometimes the thoight gets me.

You are not alone!

You need to relax and trust yourself that what you pick and choose in terms of dresses, favours, etc etc etc, are the right choices for you. Every single wedding is different because it is your own individual style that tailors a wedding. As long as you and your OH love it, which you willl because you chose it, then thats all that matters. I really wouldnt feel influenced by what you see on the TV. As for being worried about your atmosphere, I am only having 60 guests and I'm not at all worried besides you've got masses coming on the evening, I'm sure it will be fantastic.

OK take a deep breath! It all seems a bit overwhelming at first, but you'll get there. We are not all talented super-brides-to-be, which is why we have Hitched.

Use Hitched as a sounding board, ideas forum, sympathy shoulder and you'll do OK. We not only have brides (and grooms) here to bounce ideas off, but the HIBs and OMs, all of whom will be here to support you.

Stop watching DTTB and 4 weddings if they make you insecure.

You're the only one who has to love your dress - and TBH all wedding dresses are gorgeous. Your OH won't care about the designer, material or style, as long as you show up and say 'I do' he'll be happy.

You can look at TOG's work and see if you like their styles before you book someone.

Atmosphere comes naturally at weddings - you don't have to create it.

So take a step back, make a list and concentrate on one thing at a time. You'll get there!

Ok how much is your H2b helping in planning your wedding or is he leaving it all upto you??? I got a bit like this in the beginning but as soon as i realised that our wedding day was to reflect us not what all those other people on tv. Stick to the personal that have meaning to you! I picked roses and orchids are the first present h2b bought me was an orchid and the first cut flowers he bought me were roses. I see peonies and hyranga arrangements and i wobble, but then they would have no meaning other than aesthics. Involve h2b and make joint decisions and you will find that the decisions you make will sit better with you.

Am I the only one that thinks I'm gonna have an awesome day and all my planning will be totally worth it? Lol ?

No youre not alone, this is my absolute biggest fear at present. x

LOL... No I do too, I have another nearly 19 (yes nearly out the 20's) months to go so loads of planning and stressing and worrying but thats what makes it all so exciting, so when you do walk down that aisle to the man you are about to marry it WILL be totally worth all this worrying and planning now... I actually think I will miss this bit after we are married so in a way I'm pleased that we arent getting married so soon after the engagement as we can then really enjoy the stress ?

You are not alone!

I think I am one of the least organised and most indecisive B2Bs ever!

I have also had wobbles reading about other people's choices, but have realised that I'm never going to be super girly and things will get done eventually so I just need to use this forum and the TV progs to get some ideas - not to compare myself.

It will be alright on the night, so try not to doubt yourself.

I feel exactly the same. We've done 4 things: booked the venue and the church, bought my dress and booked the venue decorator.

So far I've stressed about what people will think about the venue as it isn't very grand (even though we like it); I shed extreme amounts of tears because I thought the vicar wouldn't marry us; I've just recently put a post about my worries about my dress and I'm also worrying about my decorations. Running theme...

So think it's a common feeling!

Thanks guys!! I can breathe now!! I feel a whole lot better knowing it's not just me!!

My OH hasn't really been interested in the details of the wedding - he has said that "as long as you have everything you want, then I'll be happy - I just want to marry you", which although is beautiful - it's a little bit lonely- then yesterday, I started talking about the flowers to him and asking his opinion and again, he said, I'm not bothered! Whatever you want! So I said "ok, then you're wearing red roses as your button holes then" then he said "OK!" - He then woke me up at about 1am when he came to bed and said "I want those lillies as my button holes - the ones that look like a tube" and I'm like "cala lillies?" and he said "yep - that's what i've always pictured in my head as having - and I want to book more stuff for the wedding next week - it doesn't feel like we are getting married cause you haven't booked anything!"

So!!! He does have ideas and it looks like he may have known how i've been feeling recently so he's done something about it! So all in all - I feel much better now!!

Thanks so much everyone xxxx

I think its quite natural to have a wobble on things that you book/order etc. Afterall this is potentially the biggest day of your life and want everything to be perfect, however, life isnt perfect and maybe something will go wrong, or the weather wont be exactly what you want, but its the marriage that matters and really not the frills and frou frou that goes with it. It will all be fine and once you get booking things it will all come together ?

I have been through stages of feeling like this too, particularly worrying about lack of "atmosphere", and I've had wobbles over literally everything, especially my dress (mainly cos I don't like the model pic I found online afterwards and my dress is at my mums so can't peek at it every time I'm having doubts). You just need to remember what the day is really about, and that the people who attend your wedding are there to see you marry the person you love so they will be very happy and this will reflect in the atmosphere.

One great tip that has worked for me is to stop watching 4 weddings - I realised it was probably behind a lot of my "doubts". The people on there slate the most lovely weddings and 90% of the time I find their comments b1tchy and out of order. But then they want to win and it makes good TV.

As for your ideas for favours, flowers etc. you can always post pictures on here if you are unsure – the girls here are very honest.