Just need to write it down and get it out - its pathetic

Ok, first off, did you have doubts about how you looked prior to this shoot? If so, then it will clearly show. On your wedding day you will be ecstatic, happy, on cloud 9 amd THAT will show in the photos. When one feels on top of the world you will forget the camera is there at points in the day, which in turn doesnt knock your confidence or create any self-awareness iykwim...

I dont really know what to suggest, other than play around with different angels and poses u feel comfortable with. Just remember, we are our own worst critics and im sure you look beautiful and confident on the day :-) please dont work yourself up thinking you will look horrible on your big day - positive mental attitude!! :-)

First up - *hugs* it is awful to have the nose-dive of self esteem linked to image. Is there not a single photo that you like? Your OH loves you as you are, the camera face you isn't who you are. Engagement photos are a chance to see what works and what doesn't photo-wise, including stuff like makeup. Do you ever like how you look in photos? On the day of your wedding you'll be glowing with happiness and you won't even notice the photographer most of the time, happy people in love gives great photos, even for the most unphotogenic people.

You're going to feel great on the day and it'll show in the pics! And you've still got time to play around with makeup for a confidence booster if you want.

*Weirdy internet hugs* Have a cry if you need but don't let it worry you too much I bet it's not even that bad! Your OH obviously loves you and how you look cos otherwise he wouldn't be marrying you, maybe just mention something about him smiling on the day! Although if your tog is able to capture spur of the moment stuff as well as posed that might help on the day. And as for your mum I think that's just mums for you!Also, I'm totally with you in not realising what I actually look like! I do my makeup how I think looks nice in the mirror then in photos I look tired and washed out, that's why I'm splashing out on a MUA for the day!

There is a youtube vid on how to pose your face to make your chin and neck look better, I found the lady who did it quite hilarious and when I tried I just looked odd but it might be helpful, will try and find it for you.

This me feel so sad.

I am pretty much sure that you look amazing in the photos but regardless of that, your wedding is about you and your h2b. He obviously thinks you are beautiful. He wants to grow old with you and possibly have babies with you.

Thats what it's all about really xxxx

That's quite sad. If it's any comfort, I find that the appearance of most brides improves between the e-shoot and the wedding. There's something magical about a bride... and a well fitting dress takes at least a size off you too.

I recommend all my brides book a professional hair & makeup artist. They really can transform you. I don't mean a cheapie who will add makeup to you - I mean a real MUA who will make you look better than you ever imagined.

I have never looked in a mirror and seen a pretty woman. Not even when I was 16, a size 10 and fresh faced. Certainly not now, at 42, a size 20 and with more wrinkles than I care to count!!

I look at photos of me and I see the flaws, never the good points and as a result there are very few photos of me over the years.

My grandmother was the same and I had to hunt for pictures after she died, just so I could put one on my wall. I vowed then that my grandchildren would have pictures of me, even if they were ugly! Do I remember my nan for her beauty or her make up skills? No, I remember her because of her love for me, her kind heart and her ability to always make me smile.

now when I look at pictures of me, I try to look for the good points so I notice that I have pretty eyes or that I look happy. That is what you need to do. Remember that the people who love you, love the person you are not the canvas you paint on.

Your wedding photos will be amazing and you will look beautiful xxx

I don't have much advice other than a *hug* but I feel much the same. I am horribly unphotogenic and am dreading our photos. We're meeting with the photographer tonight and I am going to have to warn her about me. I can't smile to order, I look totally forced. I have a wonky tooth that looks like it is missing from some angles, I am very pale, I can't keep my eyes open on photos and look drugged...I could go on.

Just think that you only focus on what you see as the negative points, whereas other people will view the photo as a whole if that makes sense.

If all else fails we can share dodgy photos and compare ? x

You will be a bride on your wedding day and brides always glow and look beautiful.

Oh Hun, I really feel for you, it's crap that you feel so rubbish! I agree with what others have said, your H2B loves you for being you, so don't get yourself too worked up about things. Neither me or Mr K like posing for photos, it just isn't something that comes naturally to either of us. We've still got our engagement shoot to have, but like you we're planning on including our 4 legged friend (the horse!) in this so that here's another focal point other than just the 2 of us, and on our wedding day we've requested to have the bare minimum of the obligatory family/formal posed shots, and to have more of a journalistic approach and to just capture the day as it unfolds, and to take photos of us and our guests smiling and laughing and just having a jolly good time without even noticing the cameras are there.

As others have said, once you have your dress on and hair and make up done by a pro you will feel like a million dollars and the adrenaline and love you feel on your wedding day will show on your photos

It's horrid when something like this happens and other hitchers have alreaddy said what I had to add and better than I would. However remember we always see ourselves differently to others, it is easy to be hard on yourself.

When I first saw my wedding photos I hated all the ones of me but actually that is just me (took me a while to realise that, I wouldn't read anything into your tog not posting any on facebook yet she may still be editing them.

If your really unhappy give her a call explain about H (and you) feeling uncomfotable posing and ask if you can go for more candid and relaxed shots on the day so you are less aware of the camera.

I know I hate posing for the camera so we picked a Tog who does reportage style coverage and that helped me loads. (The photos I like are the ones i don't know are being taken).

I also second what others have said if you have the budget hire someone to do your make up if not get your self to the make up counters or some where like space or MAC and book a make up lesson explain exactly what you are looking to acheieve or hide so they can give you the best advice.

This post almost made me cry! Partly cos I'm hormonal, but also cos I can identify with it. My greatest fear is that I won't look good on the day and thus, won't look good in the photos.

I echo what everyone else has said about getting a professional MUA. I am doing my own makeup and have been taking unflattering selfies with flash to get an idea of what works. I also took a pic of me with no makeup to identify what my 'problem' areas are. (Turned out my undereye circles are not as bad as I thought!)

I have never thought of myself as pretty - 'interesting looking' is the best I can manage. But my H2B tells me I'm beautiful every day and that helps my confidence enormously. Hopefully yours does too!

Exactly this - i don't have a huge deal of self-confidence and not one to pose for the camera. Having said that, i had a new camera for my birthday this year, and me and OH spent the morning playing around with it, and I took a lovely picture of the two of us (normal amount hair and make-up for day time) the following weekend, so same hair, weight etc, i went on a hen weekend and spent ages getting ready - more detailed makeup, hair was near perfect etc, but due to one of the guests i felt on edge the whole time, and all the pictures you can totally see that i'm not comfortable in the situation!

i think being happy and comfortable in the moment shows through a lot more, so on your wedding day you'll be feeling amazing and that will be what shows through!

I feel really sad about all of this, but this bit made me most sad.

I agree with the other girls that on the day of your wedding everything will be different. You will get caught up in the day and you will feel incredibly happy, and relaxed. You will glow with love, both the love of your OH and the love of your guests at the wedding. This will all come across in the photos. If you tog is able to capture non-posed moments as well as posed photos, I am sure there will be loads of photos you will love.

But back to the quote above - remember your OH is marrying you because he loves you. This has nothing to do with how well you can pose for photos! It's everything from looks, to personality, to how you make him laugh.

Thank you all for your kind comments, and for the reassurances.

I think because I have lost the weight and have so many nice comments about how better I looked, I think I just automatically assumed this would transpire in the photos. Plus I am 28 and so a lot of my friends or old school people are getting married at the moment, and using the same tog, and I guess I took it more personally as the pictures she was posting yesterday, I knew them (although she does work for strangers too btw) so it felt like a smack in the face comparison.

Another friend of mine is doing my make up, I had my trial and thought it was a bit OTT but she has assured me with the dress, hair and she has booked me in for a spray tan that it will all come together.

But worse case - there is nothing I can do with my face, I can try posing and things (and will, thanks for the tip) but with 20 odd days to go it is not like I can have a nose job, but like you all have alluded too, I am going to try and ignore the camera. The people who can see me face to face on the day will see me, and if the wedding photos are horrid too I will tell people who ask I don't want to post on the internet or social media and so they just can't see them, simple. Then I will close the photo album, put it away and focus on the memories about the day.

OH was concerned about the bad mood I was in yesterday and said he thought the photos were alright and I wouldn't have liked them if the most famous photographer in the world had taken them - but yes I know he loves me. It turns out he has taken some shots of me in the past when I haven’t noticed, I called him the other day as he had lost his phone and when I found it, up comes this picture to say I am calling and I am in this dreadful nightie thing, no makeup and look pig awful. I asked him to delete it but he says he likes it and refused to delete it - so I guess he truly doesn't care if I look awful in photos, I just need to ask him to smile more.

Thank you again for all your comments, I really do appreciate it and am trying to see the bigger picture now!! xx

Oh bless you love, I'm glad you're feeling a bit better about things, have no more advice to offer other than -20 days!! How exciting! Well done on your diet. You will look great, your OH loves you, you love him, what more could you want?! We all pick out our bad bits, nothing like a bit of self critisicm eh, pff! lol at the phone pic, my OH loves taking photos when I've nodded off, mouth gaping really attractive like, so I'm sure it's not a case of him 'not minding that you don't take a good photo' n more a case of he just loves you n thinks you look gorge in it n that what he wants to see when you call him :-D it'll be different on the day too I'm sure, you'll both be relaxed, happy, and smiling n it'll show on your photos! Good luck with it all!

Hi hun

tottaly sympahise u as me and H2B are not photogenic but we dont care we are looking forward to our big day and cant wait to see our wedding pics to see how happy we look.

This is me & OH