Memorial Ideas

I don't know what you mean by striking? I would suggest the usual of photos etc i imagine it would be hard for the relatives you have never met/not seen since three? Have you spoken to the rest of the family to see what that person likes?

Well, when it comes to my side of the family we have always been very open about discussing people who have passed, so they aren;t a problem. They'd be happy with almost anything.

I just needed ideas. Most people say lanterns, but the place I am getting married at doesn't allow them, same as candle bags.

Ah no! Was going to suggest lanterns!

Ok so what about bung tables after them? Mentioning them in speeches? Could you incorporate their interests into the favours perhaps? I'm thinking miners lamps or raf logos?

Would they allow you

all to write a message on a balloon for people who have passed and let that go?

Our table name theme is streets/place of significance to us (like where we lived). My OH's nan passed away last year, we are naming one table after the road she lived on. She was significant in both our lives.

We are also using my bouquet and table flowers to put on graves the morning after although we're not telling anyone about this because it is something that is personal to us.

I think that this is a lovely idea!

That's a shame. I suppose you could worry about upsetting people if they are sat at a table named after their husband for example?

One of Boy's friends had a table at their reception with family photos in lots of mismatched vintage frames. It was a mix of both absent and present, photos both old and new, and was lovely to look at as a little diversion. I'm not keen on a photo table for the purposes of a memorial - to be honest, I think it's a bit morbid.

I think everyone has their own way of remembering those not present at their wedding, but making it some kind of focus (other than the usual mention in speeches, or a nod to them in the decoration, or a quiet moment of reflection, etc) is not my thing.

We made no reference to any relatives not there. There are quite a few I had never met (both grandparents on mums side, uncles and mrminis grandparents on both sides) so to me it would have felt odd acknowledging people I didn't know? We are probably heartless though!

It's difficult because its a personal thing to each family. For me I will be wearing my great grandmas ring, my granny's watch and am having photos of grandparents and our parents on their wedding days just in frames on tbe mantlepiece, some of the grandparents are still with us but to frail to travel so its not such a morbid thing. Nice that we have photos of all the different weddings too. I won't be drawing attention to them, but they will be there 'watching' in my head.

To be honest, I don't think I'd have "memorials" to people who I never knew, or who I hadn't seen since I was a very young child. My maternal grandparents died before I was born, as did all but one of my great-grandparents - and the one who did live to see me born was in the advanced stages of Alzheimer's by then and died when I was about 2, so I had no meaningful interaction with her and have no memory of her. Likewise, H's paternal grandparents died when he was fairly young and he doesn't feel a very strong connection to them. It would have felt overly morbid to be doing memorials to those people and trying to include them in our day.

On the other hand, my paternal grandparents were much closer to me and died much more recently (Grandma when I was 19, Grandpa when I was 24) and I know they would have wanted to be there and would have been very happy for us, so we included them by me wearing Grandma's old bracelet as my "something old/borrowed" and my dad did a toast to "absent friends" at the start of his speech, which made us think of them. H's other grandparents are still alive but were not well enough to travel to the wedding; they sent a letter to the best man, wishing us well, to be read out during his speech.

I have stolen this Vintage, lovely idea- the last 3 generations on my Mas side have all been married at the same church as we will be too

As to the OP, what about combining photos with candles and a tag / note on the candle to show who it has been lit for?

I often do a 'memorial' table ring with a candle that either sits next to the cake or on a table with the photos. It's more for thinking of everyone rather than specific people that are passed but this is a picture of one:-

I think for remembering close relatives, it's nice to wear a piece of jewellry or have a photo on you such as in a locket or in a suit pocket. At our daughter's wedding, I had a photo of my Mum in my handbag. She was bedridden in a nursing home so couldn't attend personally. My husband had a pair of my Dad's cufflinks on one shirt cuff and a pair of his Dad's cufflinks on the other so we felt like they were with us in spirit.