Most insulting things people have said...

Only one, not really an insult just a concern, which was our 12 year old BM's mum to the BM dress. She loves it but isn't sure it's right for her daughter which I understand and I am getting it altered so it more fitting.

If my BM was saying such things, I would ask if she actually wants to be a BM because she's not behaving like she does. Likewise, anyone who says they don't like your venue, simply say, well if it's not to your taste, you're more than welcome not to come, or if they're not invited, say well I'#mpleased we won't be making you feel uncomfortable then as you're not invite.

I don't know why people think they can make such rude comments I have to say. If you've asked for honest opinions then fair enough, but otherwise - be nice!

I've been getting some comments like "I better be invited to this wedding after all I've seen on Facebook about it"

I've had 2 people say this sort of thing, I'm already paranoid about talking too much about it. I've been back through my Facebook and have said 2 things about my wedding in the past month! I hardy call that wedding overload! I know it's silly but it upsets me because I don't bang on about it, I don't even bother my bridesmaid with wedding stuff unless it concerns them.

My MIL wasn't impressed by our venue... Lol.

Well at first she was, said how lovely it was.

Then a few weeks later she told us she'd taken all her friends for dinner at the venue and how lovely it was. I was confused as this isn't possible? It's a residential activity centre who's main hall just happens to be gorgeous and looks out over the water. She explained she had been to the pub which is actually around the corner (very common mistake, everyone assumes this is the place as ours is rather hidden!). We explained this and she got super pissy about how we'd embarrassed her in front of her friends??

Now she refuses to come see our 'silly little activity centre' (her words!).

Oh boy have i!

MIL response when we said we had booked the wedding - Oh, ok! Nothing else, no questions, nothing.

Fiance's sister - I'm gonna play it by ear if I attend or not, it's a long day for the kids.

Why have you chosen beef, you know I don't like beef (like i've done it on purpose to be spiteful!)

It's not all about your wedding (hadn't even seen her to talk about it when this comment was made)

And so much more trouble from his side that it's so far making me regret booking the wedding!

Yep! People are arseholes.

my old/h2b current boss - I'm really surprised alex I thought you'd want the proper wedding day where your a princess didn't think you'd be happy to just settle' thanks, cheers, charming! She's also moaning about the alcohol (we're putting on a free bar) saying 'is it proper processco?' How do I know what's proper and what's not it says it on the bottle?!

Lots of comments about the bridesmaids in black.

My step mom has been mean about my hair extensions. Also saying how stupid it is to change my dress on the nighttime. Keep your opinion to yourself!

my sil2b has been a pain too, made a massive deal about her dress (likes it now but wants a halter neck even though nobody else is and it would look stupid) doesn't like the hair style choice, which is a plus from the other bridesmaid who has just got a bob so won't be able to have that style now anyway.

my mil2b has literally never mentioned the wedding except to moan about the cost (literally the only thing that will cost her is something to wear)

My nan is a horrible old battleaxe who moans about all the food and the distance even though it's 30mins and I've sorted out her transport there and back! Saying 'well you won't be getting a bloody present for this much effort'

my other nan has moaned I haven't invited my aunties but I haven't seen them in about 15 years and I wasn't invited to their weddings! im sure more will spring to mind! X

Not to mention my own family!

all my ideas are stupid according to my mother!

My music choices (groovy kind of love by phil collins is really stupid and inappropriate to walk down the aisle too apparently!)

I wanted blue shoes, or blue soled shoes, also a stupid idea

I wanted some decorations for the venue, apparently nobody and no wedding my parents have been to involved decorations!

and wanting to name the tables after something both me and my fiance are into (star trek!, so like the enterprise table, captains table, etc, that kind of thing!)

woah, that was a completely stupid, embarrassing idea and we can't possibly do that!

And the best one from my mother, I'm not allowed to go dress shopping until i've lost weight!

I honestly have been left very shocked by the things that have been said and happened since we booked the wedding. I didnt think planning was supposed to be like this!

xx

When we announced our engagement, I was asked by no less than four family members if it was because 'there is a bun in the oven'. People assumed he'd only want to marry me after 7 years together because he HAD to rather than he wanted to.

My younger sister's response to being asked to be a bridesmaid? She'd do it but only if I bought and let her wear this £150 fashion dress she's had her eye on for the wedding. After a talking to from our parents, she gave up on the dress but on the proviso that being a bridesmaid doesn't entail any duties of any kind or sitting anywhere but next to her boyfriend at all times.

My Dad constantly tells us for the cost of the wedding (despite us deliberately not telling him the cost of a thing!) we could have bought a house instead.

FILTB and his wife keep telling us we're doing everything wrong and should be doing XYZ for our guests.

My grandma told my mum that our colours were funeral colours (black, white and purple)

One of my BMs kept moaning about wearing a black dress and said she'd look like she's going to a funeral

As it was, our wedding looked nothing like a bloody funeral!!

I should add, that the above coupled with two proud mums who struggle immensely to keep anything secret, we've now solved all by simply not telling anyone anything about our plans and in some cases giving out entirely fictious information to make sure the real details stay under wraps!!

Terrible I know but it's made us happier!

Its terrible how rude people can be!

The worst one I've had so far is my older sister, who got married in July (due to medical reasons we planned her wedding in 2 days!)

I asked her if she'd be my matron of honour, her response was she simply couldn't be bothered and that she didn't know me well enough but she didn't care if I wanted my niece to be a flower girl as long as I paid for her dress.
To say I was hurt and shocked is an understatement

x

Nothing really, but that's probably cos we are keeping the details of our wedding mostly under wraps. And having read some of these, I'm quite glad! I did have someone I know on twitter kind of imply that me planning the finer details of my wedding is a waste of time, but that's just cos he's newly engaged and has no idea yet what's involved. I'm pretty sure that his wedding will end up being far bigger and more meticulously planned than mine!

My best friend, who does lives 2 and a half hours drive away but comes down to see her mother in law who lives 10 mins down the road from me at least once a month, saying she couldn't really get down to go wedding dress shopping with me. Then moaning because I took another local friend. Say V knows everything about your dress, shoes and head dress and I don't even know what colours you have picked. Well she didn't show any interest in my wedding at all when I first told her then after saying she didn't want to come shopping with me I kind of ruled her out of the equation.

A mate of my OH saying he had looked at the venue for his daughter but didn't like it because they thought it was 'overpriced for what it was'. Funny he is now looking at it for his own 2nd marriage next year.

My friend, same one who couldn't/wouldn't come dress shopping asking me what I was doing for a hen do and when I said I hadn't really thought of anything, saying I was probably 2 old for that kind of thing anyway! (I am 54 its my 2nd wedding).

I didnt have any comments as such mainly because we didnt really tell anyone our colours or anything, but the one thing i do remember was my mom saying "Are you going to lose weight for this wedding any time soon" lol!

Oh and i remember when we first booked it, i said to a colleague we not having a buffet for evening guests we are having a sweet cart, popcorn and wedding cake and she said "i do expect a buffet at a evening reception" my reply was well dont come then! she did lol xx

I've had a few ideas pooh-poohed by my mother, for example: blue heeled shoes, wrist loop on train both dismissed by her as soon as I mentioned them because SHE doesn't like them, but that's her natural "style" so I'm not hugely shocked!

My family are also not shy about putting their opinions forward, but at least they know when to back off - much like an earlier poster, they were surprised that we are planning hot rolls in the evening, not a buffet, but soon piped down when I said that buffet wasn't in the package and would cost £5.50 a head extra...

I'm most concerned about what my FMIL might say about my dress: she doesn't really do girly dressing up and i'm expecting a backhand comment or too in half whispers at some point. But I'm planning to just ignore that.

Brother's fiance :

'I suppose it doesnt really matter what you have as your food....as I actually wont be eating any of your food anyway??' **Said in that stupid tone of going up at the end of the sentence, as if it was a question?????????** What her reason is for not eating our food? I have no idea..... probably just that she is a rude and selfish cow.

Brother's fiance:

'You do know we will have our own drink in the car, so you don't mind us just getting our own spirits out of the car?'

? Ideally.... NO please don't! You scumbag! But... on the day... I am most sure I will not care what she does or doesnt do! (It's not like our venue is expensive for drinks.... it is totally reasonable!)

Hilarious thread. I've had so many:

RSVP sent back with a no and the statement "because we have 5 children and you haven't invited them" underneath

Chavvy uncle saying about expensive 5 star boutique hotel reception venue "Oh, it used to be really rough there"

MIL - "What, you aren't transporting all of us to the church at the start?" No, because there are 100 people coming from 100 different places!?

Non blood cousin I havent seen for four years "Oh, but I really wanted to introduce my new boyfriend to the family - why is he not invited?!"

Aunt on my wedding shoes "Not so keen on those"

Oh gosh, I think I've been quite lucky so far anyway. I had prepared myself for these kind of comments but they haven't really happened... yet! Our problems will come when we start with the guest list. xx

It's awful how rude people can be!

My brother said he didn't want to be an usher because he 'couldn't be bothered having stuff to do'. That was quite hurtful, my nephews (his sons) are page boys anyway.

One of my BMs was furious that I didn't make her MOH. Same BM then almost cancelled coming altogether as her OH's friend moved his wedding forward to our day and she couldn't decide which was more important. Same BM also commented that she doesn't want to wear a long dress or have her hair how I wanted them to have it. Future SIL then didn't like the short dresses I'd bought so I'm now having three short and two longs!

We're hiring a vintage bus to take everyone from OH's mum's to the venue (ceremony and reception all at same place) but we're not providing transport home; we thought the bus at £500 was generous enough! Peoples' response: "how am I supposed to get home?"

Then future MIL was fuming because I didn't invite her to my wedding dress appointment! It seems we can't do right for doing wrong! I've been involved (as BM and guest) in several weddings and I would never dream of passing comment like any of these!

Ive been sick of peoples insults. I mentioned where we are getting married to a friend, and she said in front of everyone, "oh thats that old bit thats got boards over the windows and looks run down" - now our venue is an old stately home, slightly aged on outside but spectacular inside, not a boarded window in site! I wouldnt have minded if she said just to me but it was in front of loads of people!

I havent asked my sister to be bridesmaid for a number of reasons, we dont always get along, she is quite a "glamour model" kind of girl (you know the kind, boobs out, duck pout, orange tan, etc etc) and she was always referred to as the pretty one and I was referred to as "ugly duckling", I wanted my day to be about me and as Im paying for everything felt if thats what i wanted i could, most of my friends and family understand but one of my sisters friends has said "Oh i can understand why she is asking her to be BM, because she would be clearly outshined on her day wouldnt she" I was really hurt, but just proved my point even more.

People can be so hurtful. Plus I have this friend who bed hops like nothing on earth, she isnt engaged yet but so far she is stealing every wedding idea/plan of mine. So now Im very careful of who I speak, I hate people who copy lol! I dont mind strangers because you cant help that but I always think when a friend does it its because they have taken your idea, Im a bit funny like that I suppose. xx

Ive been sick of peoples insults. I mentioned where we are getting married to a friend, and she said in front of everyone, "oh thats that old bit thats got boards over the windows and looks run down" - now our venue is an old stately home, slightly aged on outside but spectacular inside, not a boarded window in site! I wouldnt have minded if she said just to me but it was in front of loads of people!

I havent asked my sister to be bridesmaid for a number of reasons, we dont always get along, she is quite a "glamour model" kind of girl (you know the kind, boobs out, duck pout, orange tan, etc etc) and she was always referred to as the pretty one and I was referred to as "ugly duckling", I wanted my day to be about me and as Im paying for everything felt if thats what i wanted i could, most of my friends and family understand but one of my sisters friends has said "Oh i can understand why she is asking her to be BM, because she would be clearly outshined on her day wouldnt she" I was really hurt, but just proved my point even more.

People can be so hurtful. Plus I have this friend who bed hops like nothing on earth, she isnt engaged yet but so far she is stealing every wedding idea/plan of mine. So now Im very careful of who I speak, I hate people who copy lol! I dont mind strangers because you cant help that but I always think when a friend does it its because they have taken your idea, Im a bit funny like that I suppose. xx

I've been lucky other than FMIL who has moaned about everything.

The two most recent classics from FMIL:

"Are you losing weight for the wedding" (Me: possibly but the dress fits me as I am) "well you best not stand next to FSIL then as she makes even me look fat" ?

She has then given me some recommendations for teeth whitening places. I have NEVER EVER mentioned teeth whitening.....

Gosh, reading these, I think we have been very lucky so far - people have generally kept their insults to themselves. Nearest I have got is my mother, when I took her to show her my dress, saying "the main thing is that YOU like it".....really, I would almost rather she just said outright that she doesn't like my dress, rather than a veiled version!!

I'm sure she loves it really!!

I must admit - while some of the comments people are making are rude, hurtful, spiteful and in some cases just plain nasty, some of these are really making me chuckle. I can't believe what gets into peoples' heads sometimes. I particularly like the RSVP with a No because my children aren't invited.

I do think it's one of those things though, that unless you've actually recently organised a wedding then you have no clue what's happening in the bride/groom's world and in many cases, people just aren't thinking.

On the other hand, I have been treated badly as a guest and the people concerned know it too. Being hurtful can go both ways.

I let the moans and little comments go over my head from older members of OH's family as they really just don't understand how things have changed in the 30-40 years so I don't take it personally.

I did get one comment from a colleague (after someone asked where my ring was from) that she wouldn't accept a ring from a high street jewelers it would have to be Tiffany or similar, another colleague chipped in that that's probably why doesn't have one ... there were no more comments after that.

The worst so far has come from my parents when we got engaged. After coming back from New York (where OH popped the question) I was on cloud nine and so so excited. I called my parents and instead of congratulating us I was lectured on the importance of me meeting my OH's parents because "how was I supposed to know if they would accept me into their family?" - My OH's family live in Poland/Germany and even though we had planned a trip and were going out there, they didn't want to know. They implied that my OH may be ashamed of me or something! needless to say I was absolutely enraged and really, really hurt.

I still don't know what came over them. Maybe they thought we were rushing into things (I was with my two prevois BFs for 4 years) but a few weeks later my dad apologised and they are now as excited as we are ?

x

I have had a few mainly from my MOH.

showed a picture of shoes I wanted. "They look like granny shoes" she then went out and brought the same shoes in a different colour.

i brought some massive gold LOVE balloons, I think they will look lovely on the back wall of our stage. Got told "not to get them they look tacky" (You do have to see a picture of them to get the vision)

was having a summer wedding but got let down by venue. Now having a winter wedding. Was told "I'm glad you changed your colour scheme as I hated it"Oh dear, I did pick the colours and if having a summer wedding I would have had them.

"dont pick them shoes for you it will look rubbish against the bridesmaids dresses"

"i felt I couldn't say in front of your family but I didn't really like the dress you brought"

"you know we are honest to each other but I think you look fat in that dress" :-0!!!

my mum said something funny. Although it wasn't ment to come out this way. She said "your dress suits your face " lol. What she ment to say was your face glows in your dress.

my OHs dad is very fussy with his food my MOH said "i hope you don't cater for his dad it's your wedding" In the same conversation she said "dont have a roast I hate roasts". Lol really??? But contradiction there don't you think lol.

my nan was funny when we first went dress shopping. I was picking out dresses to try on and she was like that won't fit you, you can't try that on. (I'm a bigger girl) I had to explain several times that when trying on dresses they won't fit me but they will tie it up etc. she panicked until I put the first dress on.

" I can't stand the things you have its to busy and makes me feel sick, but it's your wedding"

some people just say stuff and not think about your feelings. It's ok telling people the truth of things but I think it's the way it's said.

although it's not nice when people say things like this, but it does make me laugh reading what people have said lol.

My dad has come out with a few, a couple of which were before we even booked!

About a venue we were considering: "If you get married there I doubt I'll be coming!"

The reaction when I told him who I was inviting from the family: "But what about him and her and your cousin (2nd cousin) etc..." I have seen these people exactly twice in the last 5 years and both of those occasions were funerals! Also was not invited to the wedding of said 2nd cousin, and although I didn't expect to be, I was annoyed that I was expected to invite her to ours. His response to this explanation was to simply say I must invite family over uni friends I see at least once year and communicate regularly with!

When we did book a venue last month (near enough so he'd come!) he asked what the rush was? (We've been engaged for almost 2 years and together for 3 and a half!)

Also, whenever the wedding is mentioned I inevitably get told that he doesn't know why we're bothering as it's an unnecessary expense, (I then remind him he's not paying for any of it so we'll do what we want!)

I don't think he intends to be hurtful but I do wish he'd think before he speaks!

OH's 85 year old father kept repeatedly referring to our wedding as a 'fancy dress party'. I don't think he quite understood the black and red theme...he did look slightly horrified on the day when he realised I actually was wearing a black dress.

Other than that we only got snide comments from my sister but they were totally expected..

'why would anyone have their wedding at 3 venues, it's so inconvenient' (the first 2 venues were next door to each other and the 3rd 5 mins away)

'why would anyone have a gothic theme its so tacky?'

There were many more along those lines!

My usually lovely mum when seeing my dress for the first time; Mum: "it's nice... I can see why you picked it... It's nice" Me: "do you actually like it?" Mum: "erm... It's nice... You said you wanted to lose some weight (which I already had by this point). It'll look better when you're slimmer. You need to drop about half a stone." Oh and the lovely "well your sisters dress was stunning".

When I told my Granda we were getting married he said 'What do you want to do that for? You'll be divorced in a year.' This is because a couple who live on his council estate broke up after being together 10 years, having kids, then getting married. Clearly we are the same as them.

From my neighbour: "you're such a bad bride. you're the only person I know gaining weight for their wedding."

from my fiance: "you're going to wear a veil?! you'll look like a dick" (he apologised for that one)

and my mum moaned ENDLESSLY because I asked her not to wear a dress with a lace overlay and lace sleeves (as that is the main feature of my dress). even though she now has a beautiful dress that she loves (9 months bfore the wedding!), she is STILL moaning that I "forced" my opinion on what should she wear on her. FFS.

Wow! Just.....wow! Some of these are awful (even though I do admit to a chuckle or two!)

My parents told me in no uncertain terms at the first opportunity that we shouldn't be getting married abroad as 1) we can't invite as many people 2) loads of people won't come 3) people will be annoyed that we aren't having a UK wedding 4) it will cost too much 5) what's the point if we are planning a uk celebration as well and so on!

In fact my step mum didn't even say congratulations when I got engaged. All I got was 'oh'.

And fsil has told h2bs ex that she doesn't want us to get married abroad as she wants her baby to be flower girl. Obv she is entitled to feel put out if she can't manage to come abroad (and obv she wants to see her brother get married) but really??? Why is she telling his ex all of this!?!?