Must haves???

One thing I didn't want to scrimp on was a photographer. I know I probably won't get my albums out every week to look at them, but I know people who have scrimped here and they have almost always regretted it. I also wanted a really nice cake - I come from a family of hobby-bakers, and several members of my family have worked in this area, so cake is pretty important to me!

However, I really wasn't fussed about expensive invites, fancy favours or expensive decorations. So we really haven't spent loads on these things - I made the invites and orders of service myself (about £140 all in for 70 invites and 120 orders of service), I'm doing a candy buffet instead of favours (I've never been to a wedding with one so wanted one) and for decorations we've got a couple of starlight cloths, seat covers, 2 light up cherry blossom trees and some balloons (sounds a lot but we could have had so much more).

Most things we've gone somewhere in the middle - we could have spent less but equally we could have spent more.

Yes, I agree. Definitely don't scrimp on the photographer. I also found it comforting to have hair and make-up there, but this is because I'm not very good with my own, and I wanted to relax on the day. This was a big thing for my own personal stress levels. I saved money on cheaper favours, table decorations and invites.

I agree with hair and make up as well, I didn't think of that. I'm a bit rubbish at doing my own, and we don't really have the luxury of time on wedding morning, so I've just paid for hair and make up for me, my bridesmaids and my Mum.

Hi Charlie,

I agree with the Photographer, been to some weddings with very bad ones.

Also, food. I love cooking and food is very important to me. All the guests will be happy if they are well fed with drinks flowing!

i think a lot of brides spend wasted money on stationery and favours. I have been a bridesmaid 5 times and all of the brides told me the same!

just remember it's your day though so do what is important to you & h2b, go with your heart.

I think the photographer was/is the most important aspect for me - although in saying that, we still didn't go for the most expensive option by any stretch! I looked at 4, two wouldn't budge on price and were way out of budget and in the end we went with the only recommended supplier from our venue. Had our engagement shoot with him at the weekend and he was such a nice guy, I don't regret it... although I hold back some judgement until the photos come back!

Otherwise, I've not been too bad at 'must haves' - as long as we're both happy (and show up!) I don't mind what anything looks like.

Only two guests so no wedding reception for me but a photographer was still a must. I agree with other comments that if you book a cheaper photographer based on the fact that you get more like an album etc you may regret it if the photos are not as good as they could have been. Definately look at their work as regards the quality and not the quantity. I also agree as a guest I dont care whether I'm given a buttonhole, a fancy invitation or favours. I do care about being fed but not about it being a fancy meal.

I've been to a wedding outdoor on a hot day where everyone was given fans and bottles of water and everyone ended up sunburned! Maybe parasols would have been a better idea.

also a wedding where there was a singer/guitarist who didn't hold anyone's attention. He was paid off early and the DJ was paid to set up earlier. The guests were all then back in the room and the dance floor full. So he wasn't very good value for money was he?

Food, cake and photos, do spend the money on. I also wouldn't scrimp on the venue, this is something you will remember for life, even if it's a pub garden, don't go for a cheaper pub because it's £200 cheaper but you prefer the other one more.

Everything else is optional, invites, we're not looking at a load of money, found a website that do them for 60p each, with writing and an envelope. We took the view most will bin after the wedding anyway. Favours, is just a token, no need to have anything expensive, something memorable and sweet is a nice touch, but no need for lots of money. For weddings of this generation we're lucky to have things like ebay and preloved, buy used decorations they'd have been used once, more than likely in good condition, and it may come with an extra thing you hadn't thought of having.

What's important for us is food, drink and our guests being entertained, so the DJ, a photo booth, candy buffet etc.

What isn't important to us are favours, invitations etc. I personally think that favours are a waste of money that could be spent elsewhere. Likewise, invitations will get shoved in the drawer until the day of the wedding and then thrown in the bin so I am going to order ours from Vista Print for about £90 x

I'm a wedding photographer, so apart from getting the best photographer you can afford, my key supplier is the hair & makeup artist. Nobody else has a greater impact on your photos or your confidence on the day.

I think it will be the photographer that is the most important, who else is going to record the memories of the day, that's if you choose the right one that can deliver a stunning set of images that is.

I think we're going to focus on keeping everyone having fun, so I'm probably going to forgo a fancy wedding car so that we can have a band. I would like the car, but am having to really prioritise.

We're also really not fussed about a 'proper' wedding cake, so thinking of buying several from M&S or Waitrose and just providing those (hopefully instead of the caterers' dessert if they'll agree to that). The first thing to get cut right down when we started looking at the budget was invites - just going straight to the main invites rather than save the dates, and keeping them simple.

However, I know I need to not get carried away with the cost cutting and not start being stingy just for the sake of a few quid. It's not that we can't afford to spend any money, I just reeeally hate the idea of wasting money haha.

Venues for the ceremony and reception are of course important, but if we went with the venue I wanted originally we would have spent over £20k straight away! We found another venue with a completely different style to what we were originally looking at, but booked it for £2,000. Photographer i agree with, you shouldn't scrimp on. Catering and drinks packages are other areas i'm just not willing to compromise on.

My cost savings have come from smaller items like the stationary (found a lovely lady on ebay who has been incredible and 50 x Save the dates, 60 day invitations and 25 evening invites have cost us £85 including envelopes, twine, little tags, RSVP slips, wedding info slips and return envelopes), favors (went to a sweet wholesaler who had large heart shaped lollies on offer - worked out 20p a go), decorations (still working on these but ebay again is a god send!). But we also made huge savings on Bridesmaids dresses(saved by getting them in the sale from wedding part of BHS and so glad as i didn't-find anything i liked in bridal shops at over £100 a go, instead have paid £32.50- I have 6 Bridesmaids!) We were going to hire suits from a chain, but got suit rental from where i got my dress at £50 a go with the groom coming in free. Our DJ has a reduced rate with our venue which saved around £250 instead of a private one. We've ditched a wedding car for me as i will be getting ready at the venue and instead have got a vintage bus picking up my bridesmaids from a local hotel and got them to do a return trip for free to pick up the groom and his groomsmen. I haggled on my cake going for a simple design and decided against a cake tasting to reduce the price from £380 to £200 as IMO who walks away from a wedding going "God, that cake was horrible?!"

So now I sound like a total cheapskate!

Most important things for me were the venue, photographer, food and my dress. I really wasn't bothered about a cake although we did get a cheese cake because we love cheese. I also wasn't too bothered about flowers and we didn't need or want fancy cars.

Spend money on the things that are important to you and cut back elsewhere.

A lot of this is going to be down to what you and your OH feel are important - everyone will have their own ideas, so I would advise taking some time to think about what is really important to you both.

For us, the food was important, we didn't want anyone to be hungry. We opted to pay for canapés, to keep everyone happy until dinner at around 4.30pm, then comfort food like chips and pizza for the eve. It ended up being the most beautiful day weather wise (we were very lucky) but when planning, we wanted to ensure everyone was warm and had a place they could go indoors. We've been to weddings where you either had to be outside most of the time or there were no heaters and we were freezing! No amount of alcohol seemed to help...Other important things were the photographer and videographer. From the few pics I've seen so far, she was worth every penny. She captured everything perfectly. Hair and make up too was invaluable, I felt so elegant and confident, and this came across in the photos. We spend all that money on an outfit and accessories, I wanted to finish off my look as much as possible! The cake and a harpist were also on the list, we had soo many comments on the cake, totally worth it. It was perfect for us, and tasted great. The photo booth we hired was a huuuge success, we have literally hundreds of pics and it gave everyone loads of entertainment.

Things not so important to us; invitations, we kept them simple but elegant, no need to spend a small fortune. Favours, we made sure these reflected us and were edible! Cars, we had everything in the same place so no need for expensive cars for travel. Decoration, we let the venue speak for itself (a beautiful manor house) and borrowed the chandeliers for the tables. Flowers, we just had my bouquet, bm bouquet, buttonholes and corsages - no flowers for the tables, etc. It just wasn't important for us to spend a small fortune on flowers people look at for a couple hours. Band, we decided to go for a DJ rather than a band, partly because our venue didn't quite have the right sort of space for a band. I think it worked brilliantly, the DJ had everyone on the dancefloor all night, couldn't have asked for anything more. Candy buffet, we knew there would be plenty of food, so instead of a candy buffet, we bought a couple of sweet tubs (celebrations and Heroes) and put them in a glass bowl at the end of the buffet. Cost £10 and went down a treat! Garden games, we were very tempted but in the end we decided we just couldn't rely on the English weather(!) and went without. Turned out to be just fine, all our guests were busy catching up with each other and we didn't have a huge gap between the ceremony and dinner.

Hope that helped!

For us again, it's a quality photographer and a decent DJ.

I have seen an article somewhere (don't ask me where I can't remember) which said the only lasting things left after the wedding are the photos and the rings. We've spent more than our original budget on both these items at the end of the day, you'll have rings, photos and hopefully good memories!

I agree that what one person sees as important others won't.

for me, I didn't see the point in spending thousands on a fancy reception venue which in our case would have been a fair distance from where we and our friends/ family lI've. So we booked one that has good outside space and was easy for everyone to get too. We had our ceremony at an approved venue which was stunning so I felt the reception venue was of much less importance. Once dressed up it looked great and so many people commented on how great it was. It wasn't even that we couldn't afffird other venues, I just would rather use that money for our home or honeymoon.

i also didn't feel photo booths/ sweet buffets were needed and we went with a cheap and cheerful dj who played all the usual wedding stuff. I can't even really tell you what the music was like- I was talking to people all night and everyone seemed to have fun which is all we wanted from the DJ.

we did pay for pro photos- but only for 3 hours to cover ceremony and pre dinner drinks. It was plenty of time. I had no desire for getting ready photos etc! although the albums are expensive we are going to invest in one ( maybe as a combined Xmas gift) as it seems daft to cut corners trying to save money on an album now and the ones the pros make are SO much nicer.

i also felt rings were really important and was our second highest cost ( after venue)

we also spent more on invites than others might but I felt it really set the tone. They weren't hidden in drawers- we saw them up in people's homes and received so many compliments. It's also something we have kept along with my button bouquet and cake toppers in a memory box.

i think a lot of stuff is very unnecessary- but it's all down to personal choice and to an extent, budget.

It'll all differ from person to person, but for us:

Must haves:
Food and drinks
We spent more on the 'perfect venue' than we planned to
Photographer
Make up and hair for all ladies in wedding party - like someone else has said, we'll have lovely dresses and I want everyone to be confident and feel fabulous ?

Not so bothered/saved on:
- My H2B wants a suit he can wear again, so him and his best men are going to be looking at the top man offers (£100 suit + shoes thing, his choice!)
- dresses: as long as I love my dress, I'm happy to buy cheaper. (It won't be happening if I don't adore it though and I will spend if I need to!)
- Invites - we got ours from Asda for £2 per pack of 8
- Table decorations - my cousin got married and still has the circle mirrors, so I'm borrowing them, then my brother has cleaned out used Yankee candle jars, which are having lace and blue ribbon around, filled with gypsofilia or however it's spelt! We're having scatter crystals on the mirror in the day, and putting battery operated fairy lights around the jars in the evening)
- favours (we're getting a job lot of boarders biccies from makro as we love biscuits!)
- DJ is coming recommended but is cheaper than we planned
- wedding bands are important to us, but we are both having our respective grandparents wedding bands, which our parents want to pay for to have sized etc.

Ummm - other than that, we're just buying at the best price, and skimping where quality isn't effected. I'm not bothered about flowers so will only have a small bouquet. We haven't really discussed room decorations - were planning a pimp your cupcake stand, but not really bothered about trees and things! Also, we're not bothered about fancy wedding cars. I'm trying to get the delorean to take my OH and his best men as a surprise, and I'm most likely booking a 'luxury' taxi (quoted £150 for 4 trips inc flowers, ribbon and red carpet at venue)
We're not having a videographer

I would say that I didn't mind spending some cash on hair and make-up - because I'm pants at doing it myself and I said that I would just end up looking the same as I always do!

Other than that, I have tried to cut costs everywhere and have been lucky so far to find the things I'd like for a reasonable price.

For us the must have's were making it affordable for our guests to attend so we picked a venue which gave us flexibility (no set caterer, no corkage, no bar) and had camping on site.

We scrimped a lot but nobody noticed - just thought it was personal touch - i.e. our favour and name place was decorated stones (this was more because I thought the cost of a little card were ridiculous!) we also decorated the place ourselves the day before and borrowed a lot of decorations (fairy lights etc).

For us the church, food, drinks and a live band were important - but we got brilliant deals. Invites etc weren't important they still looked good but was a vistaprint job when they had 50% off deal!