Need some advise on our ceremony

Oh I had to look up what the candle and sand were :s. Have you checked with the registrar that you're allowed to do extra ceremony bits? How about a glass of water and dyes of your two favourite colours, both drop the in the water, to merge into one? Don't know if that's a terrible suggestion lol

We are allowed to do any ceremony as long as it is not religious or religious by association. The water ceremony is a nice idea. But I kind of wanted a keepsake as my H2b is not wearing a wedding ring.

You could just do the sand idea then, it doesn't matter that you're not near a beach, it would sit well on your mantelpiece as a keep sake, and would also be easy to set up and the symbolism is there.

I would but my fiancé thinks it won't work unless your on a beach. Have just found some hourglasses you fill on an American site if I could find them in the uk that could work!

otherwise it back to the drawing board. I looked into hand fasting and I am waiting to see if I can use it but the long wait makes me think not ?

I can't find any hourglasses anywhere that you can fill. All the companies that I rang now thing I am a crazy woman..... Back to the drawing board!

Welcome to hitched!

I too didnt think the sand ceremony could only be perfomed if you were having a beach wedding! You would be using coloured sand anyway, not sand from the actual beach.

Our celebrant sent us a concise booklet covering everything form vows, other traditions, incorporating children/family etc. I'll try making a link to it for you.

Ahh, couldnt get link to work, so appologies it SO long!

ALTERNATIVE INCLUSIONS

Rose Ceremonies Explanation of the Rose Ceremony

Roses are exchanged as the bride and groom's first gifts to one another as a married couple. In the Rose Ceremony, the Bride and Groom give each other a Rose. Two roses are all that is necessary. The Rose Ceremony is placed at the end of the ceremony just before the Declaration (being pronounced husband and wife).The introduction by the Celebrant is:

(Name) and (Name), a single red rose always means "I love you". Your gift of unity to each other on this, your wedding day, has been your wedding rings. The rings shall always be an outward demonstration of your vows of love and respect; and a public showing of your commitment to each other. Now for your first gift as husband and wife, you have chosen to give each other a red rose, the ancient symbol of love.

Short Rose Ceremony 1

(NAME) and (NAME), we hope you will remember this day with love for the rest of your lives. Those of us who are already married know that marriage, like life, brings with it many joys and also many challenges. We also know that love, while beautiful, does not always show its prettiest face.

There are days when we may find it hard to express the depth of our love for one another. It is our hope that the two of you will set aside a special space in your home for roses, the most ancient symbols of love. When words fail you, or when the challenges of life or marriage begin to weigh heavily upon you, go out and buy a red rose. Place it in that special area in your home, so that the other will be reminded of this moment, and of the love you feel for one another.

Short Rose Ceremony #2

(Name) and (Name), please exchange your first gift as husband and wife; a gift which symbolizes to both of you the true and abiding love within the devotion of marriage.

Remember, the single rose says the words: "I love you". There may be times filled with happiness, sorrow, tears or laughter, whatever it may be, remember love has given you wings; your journey begins today; (Name) and (Name), remember the love that brought you here today; it is love which can make your marriage a glorious union, and it is by love that your marriage will endure.

Long Rose Ceremony

(Name) and (Name), a single red rose always means "I love you". Your gift of unity to each other on this, your wedding day, has been your wedding rings. The rings shall always be an outward demonstration of your vows of love and respect; and a public showing of your commitment to each other.

Now for your first gift as husband and wife, you have chosen to give each other a red rose, the ancient symbol of love.

(Couple Exchange roses) “(Name) and (Name), Wherever you make your home in the future, that you both pick one very special location in your home for roses; so that on each anniversary of this truly wonderful occasion of your marriage, you both may take a rose to that special spot in your home. Let this be the ongoing symbolism of your recommitment to your marriage vows, and a recommitment that this will be a marriage based upon love."

"And try to remember this: In every marriage there are times where it is difficult to find the right words. It might be difficult some time to say "I am sorry" or "I forgive you"; "I need you" or "I am hurting". If this should happen, and you cannot find words to express what you really feel, go to that spot and leave a rose. Any rose placed in that special location can say what matters most of all. It will say the words: "I still love you."

“(Name ) and (Name), always remember this, it was love that brought you here today, it is only love which can make it a glorious union, and it is by love which your marriage shall endure.”

ADDING A PART FOR CHILDREN.

If a couple is adding the "Rose Ceremony", often they will have a rose for each of the children. After exchanging roses, the couple will then give each child a rose, a hug, and whisper, "I love you."

"Not only are (Name) and (Name) creating a marriage today, but they also are forming a family with (child/children's name(s)). Just as it is appropriate for (Name) and (Name) to declare their love for each other in the gift of a rose, they also wish to show you (to the children) how much they love you with the gift of a rose."

HAND FASTING CEREMONY

Traditionally a hand-made length of cloth inscribed with the Latin words:

Devotio Nostrum In Aeternum - Our devotion for an eternity

Celebrant: Ladies and Gentlemen, this beautiful cloth can only be described as a labour of love. Hand-made by (Name), the words stitched onto it mirror the inscription on their wedding bands (/mirror their feelings for each other)

I now call upon NAME to give the blessing

This cord binds them to the vows that they have made

Entwining two hearts to walk the path of life together.

Bound, but free. You have chosen to journey together, each supporting the other

Be ever mindful of the thoughts and happiness of your partner
Keep sacred the vows you have promised to one another
Seek always the truth and your partnership will blossom and flourish
Be mindful that above you are the stars and below you are the stones

and as time passes, remember… Like a star, should your love be constant

Like a stone, should your love be firm for now and always.

WINE CUP CEREMONY

The years of life are as a cup of wine poured out for you to drink. The cup of life contains within it the sweet wine of happiness, joy, hope and delight. The same cup, at times, holds the bitter wine of disappointment, sorrow, grief and despair. Those who drink deeply of life invite the full range of experiences into their being. This cup is symbolic of the pledges you have to make to one another to share together the fullness of life.

As you drink from this cup, you acknowledge to one another that your lives, until this moment separate, have become one vessel into which all your sorrows and joys, all your hopes and fears, all your dreams and dreads, will be poured, and from which you will find mutual sustenance. Many days you will sit at the same table and eat and drink together. Drink now, and may the cup of your lives be sweet and full to overflowing. (glass is given to groom who sips and passes to bride)

THE SILKEN RIBBON – GERMAN TRADITION

This next ritual is a translation of the poem used in the ancient German marriage ceremony. It is said when the celebrant places the marriage ribbon over the heads of the bride and groom so that it hangs from the groom’s right and bride’s left shoulder.

This silken ribbon close entwines
Two hearts in love together
Friendships dearest pledge
is made in joy forever
United you shall walk through life
Sharing earth’s pain and pleasure
Hand in Hand you shall strive
for achievement, in life, together.
Should the path be rough and thorny
Let love sustain and guide you
Should the way be strewn with roses
Let the joy of life embrace you

Candle Light Ceremonies – Section C

Outdoor Candle Ceremonies Must Use Hurricane-Style Lamps

After the vows, the couple can each light candles, which symbolises their individuality. The Celebrant introduces the tradition - this is done from one of the introductions below. The couple then light their Unity Candle from the two individual candles. The Unity Candle becomes your Wedding Anniversary candle, to be lighted this day every year, for the rest of your lives – so choose a big unity candle!

C001: Candle Light Ceremony Introduction 1

Celebrant to guests:

For over three thousand years, human beings have used candles in ceremonies. The two smaller candles symbolise Bride & Groom’s individuality; the larger candle, their Unity.

They will now light each other’s individuality candle to signify their singularity. The individual candles are then used to light the Unity candle. This symbolises that their individuality will not be lost as a result of marriage. Name will now read the candle light blessing

C002: Candle Light Ceremony Introduction 2

Celebrant to guests….

A non-religious tradition at weddings is for the Bride and Groom to each light a candle, symbolising their individual lives to this point. From these candles, they will now light their Unity candle to symbolise the merging of their lives together. The single candles will remain lit because their unification does not mean that they are no longer individuals and will respect this fact during marriage.

C003: Candle Light Ceremony Introduction 3

Celebrant to guests….

At this very special moment, we pause, to give thanks for all the rich experiences of life that have brought Bride and Groom to this high point in their lives. We are grateful for the values which they have found by their own dedication. We are grateful that within them is the dream of a great love and the resources to use that love in creating a home that will endure. We are especially grateful for the values, which have flowed into them from those who have loved them and nurtured them and pointed them along life’s way. The heritage each brings to this marriage will continue to be an important element in their lives, but now will be shared between them.

In commemoration of the merging of these two rich heritages and in memory of those, living and dead, who were part of these heritages, I now invite Bride and Groom’s parents to bring forth the lighted candles, representing each of the families of this couple.

Bride and Groom will now light their unity candle with these candles, symbolising the union of their two families in this marriage and the rich heritage each brings to it. As they light the candle, they do not extinguish their flames. Although they are embarking upon a new and unique relationship in the union of their lives in marriage, they nonetheless, retain their own separate and unique identities and personalities.

C004: Candle Light Ceremony Introduction 4

For over three thousand years human beings have used candles as a source of light. They are also symbols of warmth, of hope, and of life itself. Bride and Groom, you have entered into a union, which is most sacred, requiring of those who enter into it a complete and unreserved giving of self. It will bind you together in a relationship so close and so intimate that it will profoundly affect your whole future. Lit candles are given to the bride and groom by a designated person/s. Would you now each, from your own candle, light a third as a symbol of your new relationship.

Examples of Wedding & Candlelight Blessings

Read by a close family member or friend

CB01: Candle Light Blessing 1

Just as a flame from one candle is used to light another candle

And the first candle is not diminished by this act of giving,

So too love, when it is shared

Never diminishes the giver

But always warms the receiver of the Love.

CB02: Candle Light Blessing 2

As the flame from the candle throws warmth, may your hearts be warmed by your love.

As the flame of the candle burns, may your lives be filled with light

As the flame is fragile and delicate, may you remember that Love can be too

As you blow the candles out each year, remember our blessings for you

CB03: Candle Light Blessing 3

As this day you have made a new light together may you also continue to recognisee that separateness from which you relationship has sprung. May the lights of your own special lives continue to feed the new flame of love which can make your future, with its hopes and disappointment, its successes and its failures, its pleasures and its pains, it joys and its sorrows, a future filled with warmth and love.

CB04: Candle Light Blessing 4

Not from pride, but from humility as mortals, with human weaknesses and strengths, you stand together today and promise faith as symbolised by this light. You will find our faith as you live each moment consecrated to a search for truth and aided by the light of your love for each other.

WB01: Wedding Blessing 1

May the blessing that rest upon all who love, rest also upon you and fill you with all spiritual grace; May the bond that unites you ever be strengthened. May you so love and work together in the days that are to come that your lives shall be enriched and ennobled by a true and deepening comradeship of mind and heart.

WB02: Wedding Blessing 2

And now, may the confidence trust, and affection you have for each other on this day, sustain you as you go forth upon your journey of life together with its joy, its laughter, its sorrow and its pain. May you find together the loftiest that is in the universe. May you dwell together in peace, love and joy.

Hiya

Have seen the rose ceremony at quite a few weddings, a good alternative to a candle ceremony ?

Ali

I am loving the rose ceremony. Will have to see what my fiancé think but this could work

thanks