Need some feedback on this idea

I think you need to think seriously about the wedding day you want. Yes you need to remember the cost of things, but It is possible to have an reasonably costed wedding and still have a pretty big wedding. You can have a lower-key dinner or have a hog roast and something like that instead of a silver service dinner, which reduces the cost, there are sample sales for the dress, and debenhams/fraser's/john Lewis's sales for the BM dresses. Theres the M&S cake idea also!

Dont rush into decisions but seriously think about the kind of day you want. Talk it over with your OH and see how it goes. You might find that someone will offer to do you a cake as a gift maybe and that kind of thing!

I agree with Deborah - don't rush this decision. I know finding the nearest date for a small wedding will be cheap, but rushing into it isn't a good idea.

Sit together and go through a list of people you feel you must have there.

Loads of places do cheap do's for big parties in winter or if you book under 6 months in advance.

Money is a nuisance - but worth it for a day you'll be happy with. xx

I do think it would be worse to look back in a few years time and regret not having some of the family and friends at your wedding that you didnt have.

I agree with previous posters comments - dont be rushed into doing something you arent comfortable with and take the time to think about what YOU want. My MIL to be was like you hve to have dessert etc at the wedding and feed the evening guests etc etc - errrr are you contributing? Then no. I am sure your mum is just excited and sees the wedding as a good reason to get the family together - just explain you are worried about the cost and also explain what you want - sure she will understand, she may not have even thought about that and got caught up in the excitement or assumed u wanted a big day.

In the end its your and your OH's day - dont let anyone else tell you what to have. If you going to be planning and paying for it - YOU make those decisions!

xx

Hi

Agree with what the others said but just wanted to add if you do go smaller you might want to look at what day you have wedding we are only having 15 guests and have a good photographer sorted but are getting married mid week and I know when I was looking at venues some will only do small weddings mid week during peak season, something to check when you are looking around x

Thanks for the advice everyone We had set a budget of £10,000 which in London is a challenge anyway, and I feel pretty clear that I don't feel comfortable spending that much. I've just been thinking how far £10,000 would go if we went on a holiday, and it makes me feel so scared to spend that much on one day. Strangely enough i'm also certain that I don't want to get married abroad, even though I love travelling it just wouldn't feel right.

Obviously i'm going to have to talk to h2b about it a lot before we make our decision, to make sure that he's genuinely happy with whatever we decide. Probably should do this before I start looking at cheaper wedding dresses, but I can't help myself. Just found one at £98 which I think looks too informal for a big wedding but it would look lovely for a small one.

Have you looked at somewhere "away from it all" in the 'countryside' where you can get married & also stay for a few days - have a private mini break with close friends & family.

Places like Clearwell castle, Gloustershire, where you have free run of the whole place for 24hrs & they also have some amazing last minute offers.

Vanessa's cousin got married in Ireland & everyone (including B&G) stayed in a local hotel/apartment complex from thursday afternoon to monday - absolutely brilliant weekend - everyone still talks about it!!

Photographers (of which I am one?) can usually offer to shoot for a shorter time too, if good photographs are important to you then don't be afraid to ask. Also have the images on a cd & look at producing an album yourselves (blurb/yophoto/iphoto etc), I've seen some lovely albums from some of my clients.

Andrew

We are having a small wedding 30people to keep cost down but are doing it at a nice hotel at4pm then just having a buffet after there will be backgrond music but no dj or owt so we can talk to every 1 but still have a nice day also we are getting marred at 4pm