Need to change my hen plans..

Hmm, tough one! How much deposit is needed for the cottage? Is it expensive? Just thinking if its not too bad then maybe the definites wouldn't mind just splitting the cost between them (as accomodation anywhere will cost them anyway) Then the people who are question marks have the plans there and can join if they want to?

Log cabins? How much do they cost? Hmm I can't think of much else! Can you give everyone a date to have their answer by and then worry about it? I don't envy you, I hate complications like this, I get very stressed out at the unknown lol xx

Wow what a palaver. Could you and the definites stay over Fri, Sat spa morning, then for the afternoon book something like a cocktail making, salsa, belly dancing lesson etc where the person would come and do a display without requiring final numbers? Then people could hopefully commit to a meal in advance so you could book a table, drinks obv if its a regular bar you wouldn't need to book, or book in the definites for a cabaret type show and people could join you later if it is a central location.

I know you are trying to do the right thing by all your hens, but also remember this is a time to celebrate YOU! I would be tempted to just go for what I wanted and if people can make it great, and if not it's a shame but maybe you could see them another time.

Hi

I don't have any tips but would reiterate what Pandorasbox said.

I'm having about 5 different hen do's in all, have invited all people to most of them, and let them pick what they want to come to, I'm going to theatre & a meal, just a meal and out clubbing, party at my mums, spa day and a do at my MIL's. some people are just coming to one and others are coming to all, depending on their likes and dislikes. The most important thing is that you have fun IMHO.

Oh Nutella, that sounds like a bit of a headache - can't be easy to sort out with people all over the place.

I had a similar problem (girls from Manchester to Southampton) so in the end we got the 5 of us who were free that weekend and made a plan and rather than present the other invitees with choices, we told them the plan and the times costs of each part so they could decide which bits they could get to/afford. I invited about 15 people and 9 are coming for all of it, 2 more for the day part. I think being able to give them definite times and costs made it easier for them to make a decision.

If you want to do a spa weekend take a look at: https://www.spabreaks.com/ you can get some good deals for hotels on there. We got dinner, bed and breakfast for less than £100 each!

Good luck!

Thanks some good suggestions which I'll look into.

Completely agree that it should be about what I want, but most of all what I want is my friends together ? Lots of different groups that I always end up seeing seperatley so I'd really like it if the whole group could come together. My friends have a habit of letting me down and I want to avoid feeling like billy no mates if I can!!

Why are women so difficult? Mention a stag do and the blokes are up for it before they even know when, where and how much! OH is going to magaluf for a week with about 30 people!!!

Crumbs Nutella I think I am going to have similar issues when it comes to booking mine. I think I might go for completely separate events if I were you. Could you have something really simple to arrange like a big meal at a restaurant in your local town followed by cocktails in the bar across the road on a Saturday night, then on a separate weekend go away for some chill out time in a cottage? I just think trying to find something that suits everyone and ensure it all happens over one weekend might end up being a logistical nightmare for you!

I know what you mean about getting everyone together, which is why I think a cheap-ish set menu (Pizza Express for example, do three courses for £20 for large groups) might be the way to go - everyone could come to that, you could do it six weeks or so before the wedding, and then you and your very close friends could go away for the weekend nearer the wedding.

What about a spa weekend at Centreparcs

This is what happenned to me at mine. The original plan was 14 hens in a cttage for the weekend in Wales. When we originally mentioned it (at my engagement party a year before the hen would take place) everyone was up for it. When my MOH came to email people only 6 could make it of which 2 were only for one night. The 6 included me and MOH. She was handling things awfully, had told people that on top of the cost of the cottage they had to pay for a naked waiter, a masseur to come to the cottage, beauticians, cocktail experts etc but had told them they weren't allowed to tell me as it was all a secret, so I just thought all my friends were being rubbish, desserting me when in reality she had made it impossible for them to afford to come by raising the price from £150 to £300, it all escalated and eventually we fell out, she wasn't my MOH and we havent spoken since (there was loads more to it than just the hen). In the end I organised my own what we did was found a village hotel (they are all over the country) they have spa's attatched to them, have a few restaurants and bars and do themed nights perfect for hens. We did the spa, had lunch, evening meal, stayed in the hotel, and did a theme night. However my hens could choose to come to as many or as few of the parts of the weekend as they chose to. Some came to the spa, some just the take that night, some stayed at the hotel for the weekend etc, but I still got my full weekend and saw everyone I wanted to.

It wasn't perfect but it was fun and was a good solution to what was nearly an unsalvageable situation! HTH.

Sorry VPL, only just caught up and seen this, sounds just like my plans with the exception of the increase in money. I love what you arranged in place of the cottage, it's exactly what I have in mind in the sense of people being able to choose which parts they want to come to. Have had a little look at Village hotels and there's one in Farnborough but they don't have a party night on the weekend I'm looking at, do you know of anywhere else that does similar things? Thanks

I agree that Vanillapod's suggestion is a good way around this, Nutella. I hope you manage to find something to suit your situation!

Vanilla, where did you go for yours? I know you live in my neck of the woods and it sounds like something I'd quite like to do for mine :-) x

How about this?

http://www.champagneescapes.com/index.shtml

champagne tasting weekend for the ones that can go away? i think the cheapest is £195. im looking at this or a weekend in london. Grange hotel in st pauls does great weekend offers!