Not a great year 2013 *sens*

That's a lot to be dealing with, lovely

Poor you and your H!

I'm not sure what I would do about the results thing - I would probably insist on them talking me through everything on the phone before the operation if I was him.

How can video games be risky? I'll always be buying them

Sounds like you have had a lot to deal with. If it's any consolation 2013 has been awful from the start for me too - I can't wait for it to be over.

? I hope you find a new perm. job soon.

I don't quite understand why they are going ahead with an operation when you've not even been told conclusive results? Ofcourse things are discussed prior to an op, but surely the patient knows why they are going in for it before that, I don't see why they are making you wait? Or have I missed something. Massive hugs to you and your H that the op goes smoothly.

I think you should tell your parents though, it's a lot of weight to have on yourself, and I'm sure they would want to know.

Receptionists are generally not allowed to give results over the phone, which I completely agree with, as they have no medical training and cannot adequately explain to patients what they might mean. The message she was told to give you was not much more help either though. ?

I assume they are doing this all very quickly because they are concerned about testicular cancer, and this is what you're also worried about? Are you sure that the actual operation is on Tuesday, and not just a clinic appointment with the urology team? Has he seen a urologist at all yet? Even if it is the op on Tues, they will come to see you beforehand and discuss all the results, what the likelihood of cancer is (you can't normally tell just from blood tests) and what the plan will be. They won't just whip him into theatre with no explanation!

Lots of hugs and best of luck to both of you x

That is an awful lot to cope with.

And quite right to come and get it all off your chest here.

I hope things are ok with your H's health and that things in general get much better for you very soon. ?

Sorry you've had such a rubbish time of it.

I can't really add anything constructive I'm afraid just that I'll be keeping my fingers crossed its nothing serious for your H.

FWIW I think you should tell your parents, I know you don't want to worry them but if he's due an op I think they should know

WHS!

Are they just routine bloods and chest xray before the op, and that's why there's no reason to discuss them prior to the op?

Hey all, thanks for your kind words.

Kharv: he rang this morning to try and get the results, the consultant was busy, so his receptionist said he would call him back. He then later got a voicemail from a different person to talk about booking in the operation, that receptionist then said that his consultant had said not to worry about the blood markers (which are taken to try and see for cancer) and that he would talk through it all on the day of the op. he has his pre op tomo, but he think that will just be with a nurse. He doesn't know about ringing again today as he's already spoken to the consultants receptionist twice and hasn't been able to get hold of him personally. He said tomorrow he's going to try and push to have some time with the consultant, but who knows how far we will get...

Hoddy: Ha yep,biggest entertainment industry in the world... Yet pretty screwed in the uk... Everything being outsourced or moving to tax benefits countries!

ATB: thanks I have a feeling I won't find anything until next year now, but I guess we'll see! Yeah we don't know either really. When he went in to be examined, they basically told him it would be best to have it removed regardless, and gave him the bloods and chest X-ray. I guess maybe they do think its a high chance, and I have read that sometimes blood tests won't tell you anyway, and they can only know for sure by having a biopsy. The odd thing is he hasn't had an ultrasound, and I thought that was one if the first things they do, to see if its a solid mass or not, but maybe they just suspect it is and want it removed as soon as.

Helenia: yeah he saw the urologist on Tuesday, who told him the above, so his pre op is tomo and the op scheduled for Tuesday morning.

Can't offer much advice but have a hug. I hope you get lots of good news soon.

I was going to say Helenia is right but that goes without saying as she is a doctor and I'm'm not... but the point is even if they have found something in the blood which raises concerns, along with the other symptoms, pain etc so they have decided he needs this operation, I am assuming that until they do the op and do tests on what is removed they won't be able to say for sure.

If you had a lump they might just do a biopsy but if his whole testicle is swollen and hard and sore and they're saying it all needs to be removed then I guess there's no point in doing a seperate biopsy.

I'm so so sorry you're going through this as well as everything else, but I am glad he's being seen quickly and then they can put you at ease either by confirming nothing scary was there, or by saying yes there was something but it's gone now.

I am praying for the former of course.

I am not a urologist or an oncologist, but I would guess that these blood tests and x-rays are not going to influence the decision about whether he needs surgery on Tuesday or not - they have already decided that based on their examination in the clinic, and sometimes they don't need scanning before operating. The bloods etc will be to act more as a baseline so they can compare post-op results and at follow-up, and if it is cancer, to guide any further investigations and/or treatment.

It is highly probable that they won't know if it is cancer or not until they have done the op and have the histology (where they look at it all under a microscope), which can take a while. They may then need to do further bloods/scans to see if there has been any spread, but again these do not need to be before the operation. I would thoroughly expect that you'll hear sooner than the New Year though! This is another question you can ask when you see them. The pre-assessment tomorrow will probably just be a nurse but she may be able to get hold of the consultant if you want to speak to him/her, so it can't hurt to ask!

HTH x

I'm sorry to hear things have been pretty rough recently.

I'm terrible at giving advice but didn't want to read and run.

I really hope things turn more positive for you soon.

I'm sorry hun. 2013 is a sucky sucky year and I will be happily waving it goodbye.

In relation to telling his family you should just tell them. I have had to make the same decision on several occasions and think of it this way - if it was the other way around would you be upset that you hadn't been informed sooner? If there is a complication (am not saying there will be) then it will be a lot harder to explain to them and when things are fractious and everyone is stressed, something like that could start unnecessary arguments. I totally understand your need to protect them (I always feel the same) but you may be able to get more support and it may help to give you someone else to talk to. We're all here if you need to just get it off your chest ? Big hugs and I will keep my fingers crossed for you guys on Tuesday.

RK x

Sorry to hear about it!

Not much I can say rather than hang in there and we are here if you want to vent. Seems like you are doing everything you can and I don't blame you for not having motivation to work on your portfolio and look for a job, all I can try and suggest is to try and use it as a distraction until you know more about the results? But not sure if it works in practice or if even I'd be able to do such a thing if my OH was going through it. So ignore the advise if you chose to.

Lots of hugs and good luck with the results and the job search.

Thankfully 2013 is almost over and soon 2014 will be brand new for you and I hope it goes much better.

x x

Hey all,

Thanks for all your kind words. Just a bit of an update, H went in to day surgery today to have the testicle removed. His blood tests came back and it does look highly likely its cancerous. However as I say the testicle at least has been removed now. Apparently the X-ray results we all fine too, which is good news. He needs to have a scan to give a better idea if it has spread to the lymph nodes in his stomach, but that's not until Monday (were hoping we can get it pushed forward), but I know a great weight has been lifted from him just having it removed. He was really scared about the operation this morning (never been under anaesthetic before) but I couldn't be more proud of him, and we are home now, so he's upstairs relaxing, albeit with quite a significant amount of pain. Family members know now, and he wants to tell some close friends.

Hey Hun,

Well lots of positives mixed with the bad news (which I am truly sorry for). I'm pleased he's found some relief. How are you doing? I'm sure you most both feel pretty emotionally drained. i'm sending you 'good scan result' vibes. Whilst its annoying that they are waiting until Monday for the scan perhaps there is a reason (give OH a chance to recover) or perhaps its a sign that they aren't too worried it has spread? Take care and lots of hugs for you both

RK xx

Thanks for updating us, I'm glad his op went smoothly but so sorry that it's likely to be cancer. Hope you're ok?

Also I'm glad you've told your families, at least they can help support you both x

Hopefully they've got it all out. I'm glad the operation went well. I'll keep everything crossed for Monday (or for it to be brought forward).

I'm glad your family know. You're being strong and supporting him but you'll need some support yourself.

Internet weirdy hugs.

Thinking of you both and sending you good luck vibes for his scan and a speedy recovery from the surgery xx

I missed your original post, I am so sorry to hear everything you've been through this year and to hear what your OH is going through. I'm glad the op went smoothly. Thinking of you and also sending good scan vibes

I was thinking of you today. Glad it went ok, though sorry it looks like cancer - but as EF says, it does have a very good prognosis in general. Hoping for the best result possible from the scan, whenever it happens!

Exactly this!! Sorry you have had sucha sh!tty time this year...

Glad to hear the op went well. Fingers crossed for you both for some good news Monday.

Couldn't put it better myself, so make RK's words mine.

Also wanted to send some more hugs and good vibes from here!

x x

Glad it all went relatively well and that he's at home recovering. Just want to send good wishes and hugs to you both ?

Hey all,

A bit of an update for you, H had his scan on Monday and today we went in for the results and I am overwhelmed to say that they were very positive! His scan was all clear, the tumor is highly likely to be just stage 1, not spread outside of the testicle (which is now removed). He had a blood test today to check his tumour markers, which should have gone down. We won't find the results for a couple of days, but its really just precautionary, as they like to be 100%. They have referred him to an oncologist as he may have to have a couple of rounds of chemo, again just as a precautionary, as they like to be 100% and he will continue to have check ups, I'm not sure how long for, but I think these things usually go on for a couple of years. They have recommended sperm banking, as we don't have children yet, and although his other one is fine, its apparently a service they offer for free if you have had one removed, but otherwise a huge weight has been lifted and we will now be celebrating by putting up our Xmas decs! Life does feel like its been on hold for the last few weeks. Right anyway, I'm rambling now, so well done if you've got this far! One thing they did say was that we caught it so early, so please please make sure the men in your life check themselves! No one ever thinks it will happen to them... But unfortunately it can!

That's excellent news, sounds like you need a few drinks! Must be such a trying time for you both, well done for staying so strong. ?

Great news. Thanks for the update I was thinking of you so it's lovely to hear the good news.

Excellent news! Bet that's a load off your mind. Fingers crossed he won't need too much chemo.

That's good news. So pleased to hear it and hope that the rest of the tests and any further treatment are easy.

And here's to a quick recovery for your H too.

Excellent news!

Really glad you had these news as an early Xmas present!

Hopefully only good ones to come from now on ?