Not inviting children - invitation help!

I would say it's worth adding a note in somewhere, because some people will just assume and that could get awkward. I would also talk to them personally if you feel comfortable doing so

We've done exactly this too! 'Blame' the venue. ?

Also, as ravioliruby says, speaking to people first is a good idea. Pretty much everyone I've spoken to about this has been glad for a night /weekend off from the kids! I think people get over-paranoid about people's reactions, but most level-headed, rational people would completely understand as long as they've got plenty of notice to arrange childcare, etc.

We put something about due to numbers we are unable to invite children but hope you will see this as an opportunity to have a night off.

I would include something so that people don't assume, as someone always does.

Thanks. Will include something - we are only having 2 at our wedding (neice / nephew) who are our flowergirl / pageboy.

Just trying to think how to word it! x

We said:

"We are sorry but we are unable to accommodate children at the venue".

There were only two couples coming that have children and one had already asked us before we'd sent the invites out if it was a non-children wedding. The other invite we've just sent it (only addressed to the Mr and Mrs, not mentioning the kids) and will drop them an email or give them a call just to clarify.

I sent one to an old friend, only addressed to her, and she still text me asking if this included her bf, so never assume that people will 'get it'!

Thanks all.

Now just need to decide whether to say

'we are unable to invite your children'

'we are unable to invite children'

'we are unable to invite children (except our niece / nephew)

I would say ...we are unable to invite children...

I would probably take offece if someone sent me an invite saying we are unable toinvite YOUR children haha implying they have the devil child ?

You could say "Due to restrictions at the venue, only children of immediate family members will be invited..."?

Sometimes you can't win though. My cousin had a 'no children' policy at her wedding, apart from her own and her sisters' kids. She didn't put anything on the invites so people didn't find out until the day. A couple of people (and I mean, literally, 2) got all sniffy and implied that they should invite everyone's kids, or none at all! Yeah, because THAT'S the most important thing about getting married; not putting your guests out by daring to have the audacity to suggest that you might not want random brats crawling and puking all over your wedding.... *END OF RANT...TAKES DEEP BREATHS* ?

First one sounds rude, second one is a lie (one which will be uncovered as soon as people see your niece and nephew there), third one is too special pleading.

I like above, "Due to restrictions on numbers, we are only able to invite family children.".

Ours said:

Due to restrictions on numbers ** and ** are unable to celebrate with their younger friends and family so please take this opportunity to temporarily pass on the repsonsibilty of children to willing relatiives and friends

Thanks.

Only inviting family chidlren won't work as its most of my family who I'm trying to tell can't bring their kids - cousins etc!

Immediate family should do the trick though :-)

What about children who aren't actually children?

We have a few cousins / family friends who have children who are between 14-16 - do you think we need to include the 'no children' message for them?

Although some of them will be invited to the evening because they are a bit older.

If you want them there just name them on the invitation

Be careful with saying venue restrictions or number restrictions unless it's actually true!

For our home blessing, we just had our two flowergirls (H's niece and H's goddaughter) and H's other niece who was too young to be an official flowergirl as she couldn't walk, but was still an unofficial one!

We just put "we regret that we are unable to accommodate children other than those in the bridal party". If yours are flowergirl/pageboy, then that covers it. It means that they are only there to perform their specific role. Our party was at PIL's farm, so his two nieces were put to bed at normal bedtime and his goddaughter was picked up by her gran at around 8ish.

Despite putting this on the invitation, we still had loads of people cheeky enough to query it.

Has anyone had anyone assume that children are invited when their not and had them turn up on the day?

I'm just curious as we're in the same position and not inviting children but haven't put anything to say don't bring them on the invites. I would assume if it doesn't say plus family or their names that children weren't invited, but then maybe I shouldn't be giving them the benefit of the doubt, and should tell them this.

Sorry no help on to how to word it really. If you do want to specifically state something, I think the 'no children except bridal party' would probs cause the least offence or any questioning from parents, where as saying we can't have children and then guests seeing some there on the day might.

Just say ' we don't like kids'

simples.

This is something we need to think about how we put it to family, some of our family will bring children fiancee brothers and sister children but hes going to ask cousins children they r not invited, i have few family members who i will invite children as im close to them but not all , i think as long as we r paying its up to us just dont know how we are going to explain this!

This was not a big issue....we wrote the names of the people who were invited on their invitations. If their kids weren't invited, we didn't write their names on.

Haha l went to a wedding where no children were invited but some random cousin of the brides chose to ignore this and turn up on the day with her 3 children. How rude are some people?

The poor kids had no place to sit and won't have had any food either.... Plus she got major evils from the people there who had not brought their children but wanted to.

We just put something like we are unable to accomodate children other than those of close family. The only ones invited were OH's nieces and nephews (aged between 2 and 12) and my first cousins (who are all 16 or older anyway, but I still this of them as kids!).

We didn't have anyone turn up uninvited but we did have a couple of people who declined and included the names of who I can only assume are their children on the RSVP card. My thoughts were "well they weren't even invited anyway!"

We just said " we are sorry but we are unable to accommodate children and hope you are able to make alternative arrangements for them"

We had one couple who didn;t come as they "couldn't find a babysitter" - for their 14 and 16 year olds!

We also had people trying to get their children in at the last minute, but we stood firm as it would have been not what we wanted and extremely unfair on those who had made other arrangements for their children.

You might come unstuck blaming the venue if it's not true = there'll be someone who'll say "oh my friend got married there last year and they had loads of kids". If you don't give a specific reason no-one can argue against it.

Ha ha! Yeah. Although, I think most of my friends know that anyway when I suggest going out for lunch, etc. and I roll my eyes when they drag their brats along...! ?

You sound like a girl after my own heart.

*Mini*, Skeptical78 - you sound like my kind of girls ?

We're just putting the name of the invited guests on the invitation, and directing people to our wedding website for further information - which says 'as you should expect from us, it will be adults only'.

We put something a bit more general to cover all unwanted guests along the lines of

"Due to venue restrictions unfortunately we are unable to accommodate children, friends, partners or guests unless otherwise stated on the invitation"

We didn't invite children to our wedding but put nothing on the information sheet (just left their names off the invite).

We didn't have anyone ask whether their children were invited. e didn't have any children turn up to the day but at night, my cousin turned up with his two children. To be honest, at that point, I didn't care and we had a hog roast so didn't effec the food or table settings. However, it annoyed my mum a lot more. In hinsight we probably could have predicted it ie he has turned up to other weddings with his children when no children were invoted andwe could have had a quiet word with him before the day if we'd thought about it properly.

We aren't having children at our wedding and all we are doing are leaving the children's names off the invites. We have, however, just put the word out throughout the family that it is a child free wedding. I have had one person who didn't seem too happy about it and my response was to just say that it is a whole 5 months away so there is plenty of time to find a sitter. The only children there will be our our 3 kids.