OM's If you could a B2b 3 pieces of advice what would they be.....

1. Don't stress. Even if you notie any problems, you can be sure your guests won't and some times mistakes may not be all bad - my best friend swore (badly) as she was so nervous whilst she was giving a speech. It was hysterical!!!

2. Take the time to enjoy your day. Try not to get pulled from pillar to post. The day goes SOOOOO fast. Do what you want to do and not what everyone else expects of you! It's YOUR day

3. Make sure you get the staff to save you some cake. We were out getting evening photos done when the cake was served and we got back in to see none left!! We had NONE of our wedding cake which was soooo disapointing!

Nat

1 - dont fret about the weather, you cant control it no matter how much you worry, what will be will be

2 - Embrace every single second because the day just flies by

3 - dont get drunk! It is so lovely waking up as newlyweds, minus the stinking hangover and being able to remember every bit of your special day.

Oooooh, just realised I never either!

Great piece of advice

1. Don't worry about tiny details such as, the colour of the bridesmaids dresses don't match the favour bags etc. No-one will notice!! And on the day neither will you.

2. The day flies by so enjoy every minute, try and spend a quiet 5 minutes with your OH

3. Make sure the staff don't steal away half empty bottles of wine at the end of the meal, you paid for it!

1. You cannot control the weather, prepare for the worst and anything else will be a bonus.

2. No-one else will notice if your details are not 100% right, only you will notice and it is not important in the grand scheme of things.

3. Give your BM, Best Man and anyone else a running order of the day and important contact numbers. You will not have your phone and will too busy to sort out any issues, let other people do this for you.

Top Tip of the Day. Take time out for yourselves. 5 minutes here, 10 minutes there, just to soak up the atmosphere of the day and remember why you have just married the love of your life. It is amazeballs.

1. Don't sweat the small stuff. It seems so important in the run up that the cakes have to be placed just so and that the ribbon here has to match the ribbon there. You will either not notice or not care. Honestly, I have no idea if there were hiccups, either because there weren't (unlikely) or I was to blissed out to notice. And I'm about as pernickety as they come.

2. Make it personal. When speaking with my guests, they were all bowled over by the personal details, the little touches, from nametagged orders of ceremony, personalised lyrics at each place setting, individual menu cards, personalised favours, a selection of liqueurs/cigars after dinner, themed cocktail stirrers, little gifts for the children we cruelly didn't invite....really, this is what people remember.

3. Do what YOU want to do. Dance when you want to, sit when you want to, chat with who you want to. An extension of this and combined with number 1, there is no point in grumbling over your mother making you invite xyz (as long as it's not at the expense of inviting others). You will not notice they are there, they will not impact your day one bit, even if has annoyed you immensely during the planning stage. You will have a wonderful time with your friends, whether they are blood related or not!

I'm not an OM but think this is a fab idea. Shall print this out closer to my wedding to act a reminder.

Thanks for sharing ladies

1) People may let you down but focus on those that go above and beyond the call of duty - you may even be surprised by who they are.

2) The day goes by so fast and it is hard to take everything in. It feels like a dream.

3) If you're friends with some Hitchers, invite them to your wedding. I had two Hitchers at my wedding and it was amazing knowing that two people who had helped me so much with my planning where there to witness it. I only wish I could have had more there...

(1) Take documentation print out of the prices agreed if you have to pay any one the day etc..my hair lady thought i was paying her wrong,my hotel that i stayed in the night before and the night of the wedding tried to go back on the deal i had made and the hotel for the mini moon tried to say it did not know we were in the best suite. I am a mardy cow so i would not take no for an answer but if you are shy or have no proof it would be difficult.

(2) Have all the money in your budget saved the month before the wedding,it would have been nice to have had everything sorted then rather than still having to think about budgets.

(3) Your guests make your wedding,a wedding with no atmosphere is crap,provide them with good food,good music and booze and you are half way there..for my photos i wanted a reportage and paid for the photographer for eight hours as the photos of all your guests antics are fab to look back on as well.

1) ENJOY IT! Ive seen so many pictures of terrified & stressed brides. Whats the point in all of the planning etc if you are not going to enjoy your one big day?!

2) Make sure you love every single thing you pick & chose - including the man ?

3) Make sure you get pictures of everything & everyone you want! Photographs are one of the few things you will have for the rest of your lives together.

1 - Your guests will remember the party and the personal touches - spend time and money on organising these and not on the other bits. My guests all took their place names home (shells with handwritten names on and messages inside - all free to me but very much appreciated by them) and were all on the dancefloor from the first song (including my mum's partner who never dances). Has anyone commented since on the birdesmaids flowers? No. Do I care? No!

2) Get copies of your wedding certificate ordered on the day - this was my top tip from Hitched. On the day they cost £3.50 each but if I ordered the same thing today it is £7

3) Top tip about the cake - I had asked for only half to be served but in the end they cut over 3/4 of it up. I wanted some left for our first anniversary and am very glad there is at least a little bit left even if it's not as much as I would have liked. I think if I hadn't asked I wouldn't have had any left. As it is we've only had one slice each before I put it in the freezer and it's going to be a looooong year keeping my husband away from it!

Agree with all of the above! Especially the keep it personal bit.

We made a list of guests and then thought of songs that meant something to us and them, songs I always dance with them to, songs that we did karaoke together and so on. Where we couldn't pick a specific song, we picked bands that were relevant to the guest and us, been to gigs, ongoing arguments about whether they were good or bad etc. Where we could pick neither song nor band (people we weren't really pally with, mate's girlfriends etc), we picked song lyrics or bands that featured their name. Some people, we just took a fair guess at what they might like - 40 year old man? He's gonna like Guns N Roses.

The general theme was indie rock, as that's what matched us with most of our guests. But we went curveballs with some (Blackstreet- No Diggety, a song from Family Guy).

The best one, which exemplified our day and which will form the opening page of our photo album (the tog photo of it, not a crappy text pic like below):

Film quotes sound great.

As a former OM, my advice is:

1. Don't get drunk. It doesn't look great in the first dance if you've been on the bubbly since 8am. Trust me!

2. What you think is really important now (do my BM dresses match my flowers? Is my hem a centimetre too short? Will aunty Mabel wear that hideous outfit? It's a waste of money if someone doesn't turn up etc, etc etc, and tbh most of the "help" threads on here) really, really isn't. It's all about the vows and the ceremony. You need bride, groom, priest/registrar. The rest is all small stuff and isn't important, stop stressing.

3. Don't scrimp on the photos. I asked a friend (photographer but not a wedding one) to do my photos at first wedding to save money. I have lots of pictures but no really arty ones and none that an amateur couldn't have taken. Second time round this is a much bigger priority and they're costing way more than the dress!

All of the above are things I would recommend to any bride. I would also say:

Chose your bridal party wisely, we REALLY learnt who cared about us and who didn't in the lead up. We had many dramas with BM's and the best man which resulted in losing many of them and its something we should never have had to go through. But my chief BM was an absolute rock for me from day one and I couldn't have done it without her.

Try to make things as personal as possible. We had lots of things included that our guests would appreciate and that were personal to us all as well as doing a lot ourselves so we could get it just right.

Have a pair of flat shoes ready for the evening. I had my beautiful Vivienne Westwoods for the day, but by the end of the meal, my flats were ready to go on!!!

I would recommend the below, not all from our wedding experience but also accumulated from weddings I have been to.

Don't presume your TOG will take certain shots which you would have thought are fairly obvious. You want them, then list them all for him beforehand.

You cannot research or question your TOG enough, it is such a huge decision giving the responsibility for those 'once in a lifetime' pictures to someone. I thought we had done the legwork and 6 months after our wedding we are still battling trying to get pics edited that are terrible and has caused us so much upset. So much so I have now completely lost interest in the pictures and don't even want to look.

Go for a company who can provide more than one photographer on the day, otherwsie you risk missing a lot of shots due to logistics/timings etc.

Get everything in writing from all your suppliers.

Attention to detail makes all the difference and defines your wedding, It really is worth taking the extra time on the small things.

Always have a table plan, even if you are having a buffet. Nothing worse than a mass rush for tables and you always end up with people being split up who naturally would have sat together.

Think carefully about timings, it is highly rude to keep guests hanging around for hours with little/no food or drink while the photographer dominates proceedings.

Have flat shoes ready, my feet were killing me even before the sit down and was so happy to slip some comfy ones on.

Try and have everything dealt with by at least a week/2 weeeks before the wedding as there will always be the unexpected/forgotten items to deal with at the last minute despite all the planning!

Remember your lipgloss! or at least give to someone to carry for you. I completely forgot and would have liked to touch up after the kiss and before the pics!

My advice:

1) Enjoy every single little bit!

2) Try not to worry and make it too complicated!

3) Make little personal touches for you - we made a cd as our favours of the songs which my husband's band played on the night, we asked our ushers to take everyone's photo with an instant camera and they stuck them into the signing in book and got everyone to sign, i picked lavender to place on the napkins and gave the vases of flowers on the tables to all my aunties at the end of the night.

4) presents - everyone gave us dollars and we used it to pay for a champagne picnic at the Grand Canyon - a truly fab present!!!

We spent about £5,000 in all on our wedding so you don't have to spend alot - sometimes the little touches are the best!

Get someone to put some buffet food in your room, by the time you get there at the end of the night you will be starving. I got this tip off hitched when I was planning my daughter left us a mini hamper in our room of our favourite foods at 2am we were sat in our suite scoffing cheese and biscuits,satay chicken, choc mini rolls and Moet ! it was the best meal we have ever eaten!

I also support the comments about taking some time out for yourselves and making sure you give your tog a list of pics, what is also a good idea is to also give someone who knows both sides of the family the list you give the tog and ask them to assist in gathering together the people you need for each shot .

And speaking as a Hib, when picking your cake try choosing a variety of flavours of cake that your guests will enjoy and not just the flavours YOU like, you will probably only be eating one piece not the whole 4 tiers!

Have you done a report yet FTLOMB? It all sounds awesome ?

Great thread this, it boils down to stop stressing about minor details and enjoy getting married ?

OK, as an ex-OM and B2B I would give th following advice:

1. Make sure it's the right guy - if you're not 110% sure he is THE ONE and it will be FOREVER don't do it. I knew when I got married first time that it wasn't going to be forever (but being an optimist I thought I could change him into something better) and maybe that was the wrong attitude.

2. Join Hitched - it will be a lifeline if your friends/bridesmaids/mums do something daft, let you down or say the wrong thing, and you will find support and inspiration there every day.

3. On the day, stop for a moment and take it all in - it goes way too fast and you need to stop and enjoy it.

All of the other advice is completely brilliant too!

Make more than enough time to get ready. Don't stress about the little things- you won't care/notice on the day. Dont do what you can't afford.

1. Don't stress! What will happen will happen regardless of whether you stress or not. I wasted so much of my day worrying about this and that and I really regret it.

2. Trust your suppliers and family/friends - they will work out any problems that arise. If anything appoint someone i.e. best man to check everything is ok so you arent bothered with anything.

3. Make sure you enjoy the day! Dont worry about going round making sure you speak to everyone as you wont be able to speak to everyone as much as you'd like anyway. Otherwise all you'll be doing is going round speaking to people rather than dancing and having fun with your new hubby!

1 - Make sure you get all your details from suppliers in writing and when you get invoices CHECK THEM! I had alot of incorrect invoices which caused alot of stress.

2 - Don't be afraid to make things. I am not crafty but made the table plan, favours and some tealight holders. Saved a fortune and we had a great time making them while the boys were on stag.

3 - Do not worrry about all the colours matching (i.e. all the same shade of purple). It doesn't matter, no one will notice and you will save yourself alot of stress.

Hi, not an OM but a wedding photographer. I shoot 50 weddings a year and always try to help as much as I can. I am actually about to do a video on my 'top tips they dont tell you about in the magazines' Here is a selection

1 - On the morning of your wedding, you can do no more. Everything that you have worked for has been done and its time to relax and take the day in. Things will go wrong but as long as you are there, he is there and there is someone to marry you, then everything else is a bonus

2 - Dont let others stress you out. I have seen lots of well wishing friends and family add to the stress on the morning without knowing it. "Your car is here already" I often hear being shouted. The car will always be early and its not going without you so remember that you have the control. Those around you will often do things that can get your adrenaline going just let it wash over you.

3 - Dry the bottom of the stems of your flowers off. They can make a lovely wet stain on your beautiful dress if still wet.

take the stickers off the bottom of your shoes! Hairspray will help if they are really sticky.

Get into your dress earlier than you think. Especially if its one that laces up the back. They are always trickier than they looked in the shop and need to be tied twice to make sure you are in properly. Plus you want a few minutes to settle into it.

4 - Take a bottle of water with you in the car. You will get a dry mouth on the way

5 - Just before you get out of the car or enter into the wedding room, take 15 seconds to deep breath and take it in. With all the excitment, it can flyby without noticing it

6 - Have that first kiss. Even if its in a church where they dont pronounce you "Man & Wife" (yes it does happen - a lot) Still have the kiss for many, its the moment you are truly married and if it doesn't happen, its a shame. Ask your priest vicar if he does normally pronounce you man and wife.

7 - Book ample time between the end of service and sitting down. Once the meal starts, the rest of the day flys by. Leaving a couple of hours to speak with friends and enjoy the atmosphere is fantastic

8 - Receiving lines can really eat into your day. Unless you really want one, think seriously about it. 100 people at 30 seconds each is nearly an hour out of your wedding day. You will rarely talk to everyone on the day anyway but going around the tables between courses will give you a much better opportunity for talking to key people.

9 - Buy some sparkly trainers (converse do a great pair) for you and your bridesmaids. If you dance then so will everyone else. It will be a relief to change from heels (of so I am told!)

10 - This is the funny one but the most useful and the one that gets the most reaction. I know it works as lots of brides have thanked me for it. If you have a long train on your dress, it can be tricky to go to the loo. Typically, brides will have their friends lift the dress up behind them. But, the trick is...... Go forward onto the loo! Seriously, put your tummy where the systen is. This means your dress goes behind you and doesn't need to go up in the air! I know its funny but it works.

I seem to be full of useless / useful wedding tips, information, etc. I hope some of these will help. I will let you know when I put my video online with some extras.

Sean

1 - Have a videographer. This is my biggest regret for my Wedding. There were things through out the day I can not even remember, it was such a whirlwind! If I'd have had this recorded, maybe I could have sat back and watched my day all over again, and seen the bits I missed.

2- Spend time with your new Husband. Even if only for 5 mins, take that time together to reflect. Your day will consist of speaking to you all your guests so grabbing that 5 minutes together just to go 'wow, we did it!' makes all the difference.

3 - Get someone to take charge of your guest book. I left mine next to my card post box for people to sign and it hardly got touched. If you can get it passed around onto the table for your guests to sign, do it. I love reading the few comments I have in there back to myself, I only wish I had more. Esp when it took me ages to create my beautiful guest book.

Now that seems like a great idea - I can imagine a cosy midnight picnic for 2 being just what you need.

But all this is brlliant advice - thanks everyone x