One less bridesmaids

It seems quite common,i have heard of this happening quite a few times. I don't know why her having twins who will be around 9 months? at the time will make much difference. Think of the money you will save though.

I haven't lost one but my sister is expecting her baby in October and is still going to be my BM in June so no reason really to drop out but then again she isn't having twins!! How many BM's are you having? Do you still want her to be one or are you okay with it? Like you said at least she let you know now.

Yes, I found out about 8 months ago that my original MOH had been bitching about me behind my back to ex-friends of mine. It's a long story.. so to cut it short.. I thought she was on my side but it turns out she couldn't resist being a b*tch and running back to a group of b*tchy women and b*tching about me. Me and them fell out a long time ago when I stood up to one of them and told them how childish they were acting when they were, funnily enough, b*tching about other women.. one of them being the woman who would then become my MOH who then decided she'd rather be friends with those who said some really nasty stuff about her. Makes me ashamed to be female sometimes.

My SIL had 4 BMs but lost one due to pregnancy- unfortunately the poor woman had a miscarriage and, as the wedding was on the baby's due date, she didn't come to the wedding.

These things happen I guessl

I have 4 now. I am ok with it (well kinda) I didnt like the way she worded the email. When she got pregnant I wonderd if she would still be ok as she would have twins who would be 7 months plus 2 other children. She was like no it will be fine my husband and friend (who is invited) can help.

As I said I think the main thing that pissed me off was the email.

TBH it probably is for the best as I think there may have been tension between her & OH. They are civil but when I asked him if she should be bridesmaid he said "dont do it on my behalf" I asked as I thought if my brother was getting married I would like to be BM's. Oh well onwards and upwards

Can you not leeave it open for now? If she's 4-5 months pregnant she may be hormonal, or trying to cope with the concept of twins, or just feeling fat. If I were in your position I'd email back saying she doesn't have to make a decision right now.

I started out with one BM - I promised my niece she could be BM if I ever got married again. Then my son got upset because he had his heart set on being Best Man, but my OH wanted his sister as Best Person instead. He thought he was going to be left out, so he's now a bridesmaid Man of Honour. So I have gained one!

I thought I would lose my MOH for the same reason as your SIL2B. My friend and MOH was pregnant when I asked her to be a CBM / MOH and I thought she would say no, as at first she thought she wouldn't be able to help much. But she did, in fact more than my other 2 BMs, and even came to my house when she was 8 months pregnant, with a load of tealight holders and candelabra she is lending me from her own wedding. She now has a 9 months-old boy and although busy she still had time to organise my hen do (which is a surprise).

However, I lost my junior bridesmaid (12 years old) as she is the daughter of my best friends from my native Romania and they have just told me they can't afford the trip. This, after I have been asking them for months, as I needed to sort out a dress for the girl etc... Initially they were definitely coming, even said yes when i asked if it was OK for me to buy jewellery and tiara for her etc... I even bought her shoes, which i have now sold. I am also selling the tiara and jewellery set on ebay (there's a thread on here as well, under the Marketplace / For sale section)... i wasn't impressed, I'll tell you, especially as apart from my mum, they'd have been my only Romanian guests! They kept me guessing for so long and even now they keep saying that I have bags of time left (6 months) and why am I rushing so much! Well, I guess they are used to Romania, where they look at you as if you are crazy if you start planning a wedding more than 6 months in advance at the most!

I had wanted my 2 siters and 2 of my friends to be my Bridesmaids, but one of my sisters refused. Took me nearly 4 years, but i've managed to get her to agree to be one!

I can only afford one, so I've had to drop the other, which has upset me, but the money needs to go into more important things such as the venue cost!
She completely understands, and I'm going to have her do a reading instead which she is writing herself. ?

I had 6 people think they were going to be bridesmaids.......I then lost them all as I changed my plans and had a tiny wedding abroad!

I originally had 3 bridesmaids, then one of them said "ooopss i've just gone & booked a holiday on your wedding day so cant be a bridesmaid" which i was soooo furious about seen as i'd asked her months & months before she booked the holiday....turns out now shes pregnant & due beginning of July so has had to cancel the holiday!!

It's acutually worked out for the better now, i can just have one bridesmaid on either side of me on photos lol x

I only have one BM who is pregnant and due two weeks before the wedding! She has been amazing and still organised my hen do. We plan to take it as it comes - if baby arrives on time or a little early she will be BM, but probably not stay the whole day/eve. If baby is late we will see how she feels, hopefully she will still be able to come to a bit of the celebrations even if she doesn't feel up to being BM.

its probably a bit of a shock at the moment that your SIL has dropped out, but maybe leave things open for a little while - no need to make definate plans yet. Also sometimes in e-mail/text, things don't come across as they are meant as you can't hear the tone of the voice and often punctuation is not accurate.

Think thats what annoyed me as well. I would have preferred if she had just called me and explainned. TBH I am more jarred about the way she went about it than the fact that she doesn't want to be a BM.

I also experience that but I didn't worry that much. I choose my sister's eldest daughter instead as my bridesmaid.

I agree with what everyone else says - only time will tell whether she's really up for being bridesmaid, so unless you have to make the decision now, i'd keep the door open.

Over the course of wedding planning i've lost 2 bridesmaids (Including the friendship of one!). The first one was over an issue with plus ones - my BM is dating my ex, and i'd asked that he didn't attend, so she refused to attend too, so lost her as a BM and a friend, although we've just started speaking again now.

The other BM I've lost is because she is off to work in New Zealand over the course of the wedding. I was a tad upset but more happy for her - it's something she's worked her bottom off for. Thankfully she told me the Tuesday before I ordered their dresses on the Saturday. I had already got her jewellery/booked her hair/got her thank you gifts and card but no big deal. I can keep the spare necklace/bracelet and have given the spare gift to our readers.

I spoke to OH and he said he prefers this way. He doesn't want her involved. He thought I wanted her for a bridesmaid originally. I only asked as she's his sister.

So works out better. I have an even number of BM's and can spoil them more

I'm glad it seems to be working out in a good way! I was going to say leave it be for now and see how it plays out, but it looks like one less BM will work out better for you!

I have 3 bridesmaids, but I may lose one. My sister doesn't like to wear dresses and has said to pacify mum she'll come and try the dress on but if she doesn't like it, she doesn't won't wear it and doesn't want to be a BM. It doesn't bother me too much (as I've involved her in other ways with which she is more comfortable) but it does bother my mum who says it's 'not right' not to have my sister as a BM!! It's one of those caught between a rock and a hard place things, but me and my sister know the score so mum will hopefully just deal with it!