parenting a teenager

I sympathise. J is 11 and sometimes it feels like a punishment.

Hang on, he/she'll thank you for it eventually ?

Thanks Clairy. Sympathy for you too!

It is a bit like banging your head against a brick wall, in the knowledge that it will one day become a stone wall - stronger, wiser with age, will rebuff you all the harder ?

It will get better - my brother assures me that they turn 'ok' at about 17 ?

I let elizabeth go into brum with a friend on saturday - was chewing my nails off the whole time she was out......

My sympathies go to you! But oit will get better. You need to remember that these teenagers are walking bags of hormones, finding their way in the big bad world!

My son is now 19, and only just recently "turned the corner".

Many trials and tribulations later, I can now sleep at night and he is a lovely boy ?

In fact, only just recently when he was a bit abrupt with me, he went on to say "Mum I'm sorry for snapping at you, I'm just tired. You need to remember that the one person I love the most in the world is you".

I totally choked up, and realised that as long as I know he loves me I can cope with whatever else might come along!

Your teenagers love you too, they just may not be very good at showing it right now!

Big hugs all round xx

Urgh you have my sympathy too - I have a 13 year old girl and am finding it hard too. Urrrggh [:'(]

I'm struggling with a 9 year old, she's turned into the devil child and we are constantly having to tell her off. We try to reward the good but it's very rarely there lately ?

GWTW you are doing you very best for that girl and she is lucky to have you!

? all. I'm having a hell of a time with No1 son at the moment, if it's any consolation. If I haven't killed him by Christmas it will be a triumph of self-control on my part.

GWTW, you have taken on a lot, don't forget that. At least when you've had a teenager from birth, you've had all those years to set ground rules, build up a bank of experiences and "family" stuff which you can fall back on when they hit hormone hell. I'd expect your niece to start pushing buttons as soon as she's sure of you. Nod, smile, drink gin. I think that's the way forward. Maybe we need to set up a support group? ?

Swamps - how is E doing? I think of you (and her) a lot.

Not there yet myself, but just wanted to share that I have 3 nieces of 14, 11 and 7 years. My sister really struggles with the 11 year old and also is constantly at war with the 14 year old. However, when I'm with them (I see them for long periods of time on my own in the holidays) they tell me how much fun their mum is and that they love her. They may be telling me what I want to hear because she's my sister et all, but I can see that those strong foundations are really there.

Keep going. It'll be worth it. I was horrible to my mum from about 16 to 19. Horrible. I could barely look at her let alone speak a civil word to her. She had honestly done nothing to warrant such hatred? Things turned when I was about 20 and now she's one of my best mates.

Big hugs to you?

A (nearly) teenager step-daughter is quite enough for me - I do sympathise. I was a horrible (nearly) teenager, and would be able to reduce my mother (a secondary school teacher) to tears within about 3 sentances during a row. But after about 9 months of being the most evil cow I apparently grew out of it. My younger sister didn't turn evil til she was about 15 but made my parents suffer for about 2 years... I hope that the teenager behviour nightmares don't last too long for you!

I think it's harder for you than most anyway because you're not her Mum.

?

WZS.

But yesterday, I had a phone call from Social Services connected with an incident at the bus station last week. Camperkid lost his Oyster card and claimed that he was afraid to come home because I would hit him.....

If he continues to pull fecking stunts like that - I will be hitting him.....?