Pooba's very long report

The Beginnings… + 8 years

I met OH on the third day of university, back in the depths of October 2006. Of everyone I met in those first few weeks, our meeting has always been the one I remember vividly – even before we got together. Maybe we knew then we were made for each other?! Or maybe it was because I immediately took the p1ss of him coming from Essex and pretending to be scared. Anyway, we both got to the introductory meeting of our course early and sat next to each other in an empty lecture theatre. Found out we were in the same halls, same block and studying the same course = immediate friendship.

We stayed close through the first term of uni, both seeing other people and partying. Towards Christmas, we started spending much more time together and then ended up having a late night ‘Love Actually’ film session in my room with a few other people gate-crashing. He’s said that if no one else had been there he would have asked me to be his girlfriend there and then, but… the others wouldn’t leave and in the end it was stupid o clock in the morning and I wanted to get ready for bed so I kicked them all out. This was back in the days of good ol’ MSN and I logged in as I was about to have a shower (uni logic) and when I came back he had sent me a message. For those of you familiar with Love Actually, there’s a scene with Andrew Lincoln where he professes his love for Keira Knightley using placards. OH did the equivalent, using an internet chat room – “Pooba, because it’s nearly Christmas (and at Christmas, you tell the truth), I really, really like you. Sleep well xx”

Long story short, we went on a long walk the next day (last day of term) and I admitted that I liked him too but needed Christmas to get my head together. Came back after the break, I ran to his room when I saw he had arrived (literally running into his parents and sister at the same time. Great first impression!) and we became official.

We helped each other through university, both struggling majorly at times. We met some great people and some not so great people. OH was meant to spend a year abroad but decided to come off the course because he didn’t want to leave me and his family – I was very worried he’d later resent me for this, but thankfully it’s never happened! We had fun, we cried, we laughed, we had some mega trips away, we introduced the other to home friends and family. All was good in the hood.

Graduation was a strange one: I’d managed to find a job in our degree field back at home but OH didn’t have a clue what he wanted to do. So I came home to Bournemouth and he went back to his family in Essex. There was a period of 4-5 months where we long-distanced it and I have to say, they were horrific. I have so much respect for people who do it long term. Anyway, on the off chance, my boss asked if OH could cover for one of our co-workers who was on holiday for a fortnight and he never really went home. 6.5 years later we’re still here

Now getting down to the serious stuff. I’ve always known I wanted to get married. OH, not so much – he always said a piece of paper meant nothing. After 8 years, I’d come to terms with the fact that it probably wasn’t going to happen and I should be happy with my lot. We got the money together to buy our first home together, which we moved into January 2015. We had money behind us, good jobs, all was well.

Both of us are very interested with the weather and decided (with our best friend) to go storm chasing in America and hopefully see a tornado or two. We went in 2013, no bad weather We went in 2014, a little bad weather but no tornados. We went in 2015…

The proposal

… and only went and seen a goshdarnit motherfunking tornado! 7th May 2015. Still gives me them chills thinking about it. It wasn’t quite as brilliant as I’d imagined: the weather was appalling, we were getting rained on, it was late in the day so very dark, there were lots of other stormchasers screaming around and we were in marshlands getting bitten to buggery by mosquitos. It wasn’t very pleasant, if I’m honest. Regardless, cue me facetiming my family the next morning at ~5am to say that we’d seen a tornado, how amazing?! My parents were particularly underwhelmed (and concerned about our safety!) which I thought was sweet but a little annoying – why weren’t they happy? Little did I know that OH had asked for their blessing before the holiday and said he was going to propose in front of a tornado. They were scared/thought he’d got cold feet!

Next day was a bust, but the 9th May was brilliant. After an 8 (yes, 8) hour trek to get into position, we found the most perfect storm which spawned a beautiful tornado. We were placed in the prime location, in sunlight with the cell straight ahead of us and while I was filming the remnants of the tornado fading away, the OH kept wanting to hold my hand. I swatted him away – can’t you see what I’m doing?! – before I notice that he’s getting down on one knee. Our best friend gracefully faded into the background, while OH said “you’ve had one dream come true this holiday [seeing a tornado], now hopefully I can make another one happen. Pooba, will you marry me?” Lots of hand flapping and ugly girl tears, we were engaged! Three-way hug with our friend, a random altercation with a farmer who thought I was being attacked by these burly blokes and then we carried on with the storm chase!

Build up

Looking back, I *think* I was a chilled out bride. I can’t remember getting really stressed about anything and everything seemed to just fall into place – although looking back through my posts on Hitched might tell a different tale

We decided we didn’t want a long engagement having already been together for 8.5 years already, didn’t want a depths of summer/autumn/winter wedding and maybe a storm chasing honeymoon = 21st April 2016.

We only saw one venue and booked the majority of their recommended suppliers.

Seating plan was an (almost) doddle.

Guest list was fairly simple – we kept it pretty close, 56 for the day and another 15 or so in the evening.

Dress hunting was reasonably easy – chose the second of seven dresses.

Family wars were kept to an absolute minimum.

Bridesmaids – I only had one, my SIL. I could have easily had two others: my best girlfriend and favourite cousin, but other close friends and cousins would have been upset so decided to leave at that.

I employed a personal trainer, sorted out my diet and lost about a stone. I’m now probably the best shape I’ve ever been in.

The only real issue I had was with my skin: even though I’m lateish 20s, I’ve always had bad spots. Thanking the gods at Liz Earle, they’ve managed to produce something that has left me with the best skin I’ve had since hitting puberty and while I had one little blemish on the actual day, I was imagining a face full of boils so Liz Earle, I salute you, I love you, I will give you my firstborn.

The day before

Was a pleasant day. Weather was brilliant! We had a rehearsal at the venue at 0900, which went swimmingly apart from the music. Wanting ‘Love Actually’ to play a part in our day, I walked down the aisle to ‘Glasgow Love Theme’ – beautiful music. The venue had asked for us to make a playlist with the song repeated several times and it would keep playing until I came in. Now, Spotify is amazing… as long as you know what you’re doing with it. Halfway down the aisle walking with my dad, looking ahead to OH, best man, my mum, my brother and my SIL… Jessie J ‘Bang Bang’ comes screaming out the speakers! We styled it out and laughed that it would be hilarious if that happened the next day. Thankfully, it didn’t.

After that, SIL and I went into Bournemouth to get our nails done and then we met up with everyone again for lunch. I got the wrong drink served and my meal was forgotten which was a little annoying (I was ruddy starving), but the restaurant sorted it reasonably quickly and they took it off the bill, so it was a win in the end. We were joking that hopefully everything that was going to go wrong would happen today.

Some of OH’s friends from Essex then arrived so we went for a walk along the beach, left them at their hotel and went home so I could pack for my stay at my parent’s. It was surreal, OH, SIL, BM and me watching Geordie Shore waiting for the time I should head off.

I eventually left, had a great dinner with my family and settled down to watch Total Recall. I logged on to have a look at my Good Luck thread – special mention to everyone who sent their best wishes. I honestly got quite emotional reading your messages, so thank you. Bed at 2330 and slept reasonably well.

The day itself

Woke up naturally at about 0715 which is much earlier than I’m used to, but I felt okay so just lay there for a bit thinking about the day ahead. Text the OH to check we were still going ahead (!) and he thankfully said yes. Mum was already up and about stressing, so I went downstairs and curled up under the duvet on the sofa. My brother joined me and we just sat there listening to Mum run around the house. Dad came back from the gym about 0830 and yeah… we chilled, Mum panicked. My SIL was dropped off by the best man about 0945, MUA and hair arrived at 1000 and we made a start! I wasn’t nervous at all; the only sense I had that told me I wasn’t 100% was the complete and total lack of hunger. Dad cooked bacon sandwiches and I took a couple of bites, but I couldn’t handle any more. TOG and VOG arrived about 1215, by which time I was made up sans dress and everyone else was starting to get dressed in their finery. All of a sudden, TOG was indicating that I needed to get into my dress and so began the sweaty process of cramming my body into a dress that magically was a huge struggle to get into, but fit amazingly when it was on! My mum and SIL just couldn’t get the pearl buttons to work, so Dad had to come in and help. Pro: he got the dress on! Con: I missed out on him coming in and me being ready and seeing his face. That said, he surprised me with a beautiful sapphire necklace which matched my earrings and we had a moment then.

Outside for some quick family shots, then TOG, VOG and my brother disappeared to the venue and we were sat waiting around for an hour.

I’d already pre-warned myself about this period of time where we were all ready, but couldn’t leave and it was one of the most surreal moments of my life. We took some selfies, did some loo practice in our dresses (Dad wasn’t involved in this stage ) and waited… and waited… and waited… I still wasn’t feeling too nervous at this point, I just wanted to get going!

Finally at about 1430, we got into my Dad’s work van (posh cars were too expensive, so Dad scrubbed his up) and away we went. Naturally we got stuck in traffic, but got to the venue at 1450, for the ceremony to begin at 1500. Had a brief meeting with the registrar – Dad and I wanted him to go down as ‘Space Cowboy’ on the certificate, but went for the more sensible ‘Company Director’ title- and all of a sudden we were in the drawing room, about to travel down the lawns to the ceremony marquee. We were in the procession – my mum and brother, SIL and then Dad and I – and about to head off when I noticed OH’s godfather and his partner quickly scooting past the window and running towards the marquee. Very funny.

All was well until we just about got to the marquee (hidden from view by a couple of trees) when my mum lost her shoe in the grass. Again, a moment which lightened the mood for us, although she wasn’t best pleased. At this point I could just about hear the music playing, Dad was saying how wonderful it all was, Mum and brother walked down the aisle, SIL was heading off and then it was our turn! I remember the co-ordinator nodding at me and whispering good luck, Dad telling me to take it slow, catching a glimpse of my cousins through the window and seeing them crying and then we were at the beginning of the aisle. I took a deep breath – there are a couple of photos of me looking like I’m about to faint! – and then I saw my OH at the end. That was it – no one else mattered, except for my dad holding onto me (and reminding me to walk slowly!) and OH. I got about half way down the aisle before I realised OH was crying and then I nearly went. Dad and I got to the end and I reached out for OH’s hand and then the three of us stood there as the registrar spoke. We had a laugh when Dad tried to give my hand to OH, but we got confused and ended up in a three-way handshake.

The ceremony itself was as brief as it could have been – no readings and the shortest of vows. Even then, I managed to *** up – the first question asked was: “Pooba, are you free and able to marry Mr Pooba” and I forgot what I was supposed to say (‘I am’) so ended up saying “I am, I do, I will, whatever works!” OH said he thought I had messed up intentionally as a joke, so I was a bit embarrassed when I told him I actually didn’t have a clue what I was doing or saying. The rest passed like a blur; I can recall looking at my OH and thinking that my mouth was really dry. I remembered to speak loudly and clearly for the VOG – OH was mike’d up, but I wasn’t. The rings went on fine and no one else fluffed up their lines. I faintly recall the registrar saying that we were married and it was time to kiss, and me grabbing OH’s shoulders in a hug – that sounds way more dramatic than it was The issue with me moving my arms up high is that I was wearing a ‘strapless’ dress with detachable capped sleeves poppered in. These were fine as long as I didn’t raise my arms too far, but in the movement of hugging the OH, I heard what sounded like the biggest POP in the world. I was scared I’d ripped my dress or something, but thankfully only one of the poppers had come undone so it was all okay!

We then had to sign the register and it was that point I realised/remembered that there were other people in the marquee with us! They grabbed a table and chairs for us to sit down and then we found out that they’d given my husband (eek!) a quite short and squat chair. On one hand this was brilliant because he’s taller than me so we should have been equal heights while sat down = better photos. On the other hand, because I was forced to sit completely upright because of the boning in my dress I was sat perfectly, whereas he was slouching away so some of the photos look quite strange.

Our siblings signed as our witnesses and then it was done!

We’d ummed and ahhhed a lot about the music that would be playing while we signed the register and eventually came up with 3 songs that meant a lot to us/our family. The first was Hall and Oates ‘You Make My Dreams Come True’ – reminds me of the film ‘500 Days of Summer’. Second was Chuck Berry ‘You Can Never Tell’, which worked two ways – Pulp Fiction is my Dad’s favourite movie so he was dancing to me from the front row, and the OH and I absolutely LOVED Jay and Aliona’s dance to it on Strictly Come Dancing last year! Finally we had Faith Hill’s ‘This Kiss’ – OH is a huge country music fan (!!), it’s our best man’s favourite song and it’s turned into a group song whenever we’re road tripping in America.

The next hour or so literally flashed past. We walked out, had about 5 seconds of calm and then people ran at us for hugs and congratulations. It was so nice to talk to everyone (and have a glass of the fantastic English Garden Cocktail we chose), but my cheeks were already hurting. Photos were taken and we were being pulled left, right and centre, by the guests, by the VOG, by the TOG… it was mental!

We had a few minutes peace when the TOG brought us to the main marquee, although I had started to get scared by this point: I can’t quite remember when the OH had told me, but he’d mentioned that there was an issue with the table plan. We’d then got pulled apart so I didn’t know quite how bad the table plan was. To explain: as well as chilled, I was also a very lazy bride and got our venue decorator to write out all of the placecards and table plan. As a result, we had had to send her the table plan and guest list by 12 the day before, but we’d had a last minute shuffle on the top table and the table plan understandably didn’t recognise this. OH also thought something else was wrong on another table, but it wasn’t. Men!

A few photos were taken while the marquee was quiet. Oh, and I saw our cake for the first time! Jeepers, it was amazing… but I’ll let the photo speak for itself. Anyway, we were dragged out so the guests could come in and then we made our grand entrance. Food was absolutely epic (although I wasn’t hungry and only had a few bites of each course K). Starter: tomato and basil soup, main: roast beef, Yorkshire pudding, roast potatoes and all the veg, dessert: (men) dark chocolate and raspberry cheesecake (women) white chocolate and strawberry cheesecake.

I’d organised a playlist to be in the background, but I’d been sorting it out most evenings just as I was going to bed. Music that seems like a good idea at 1 in the morning often doesn’t work in the cold light of day… I’d picked songs that meant something to me and the OH, or with friends and family but there were times where we had things like Ke$ha with ‘Tick Tock’ followed by Right Said Fred with ‘I’m Too Sexy’! One brilliant moment was when Justin Timberlake ‘Let the Groove Get In’ came on; this is mine and my best friend’s SONG so I caught her eye on her table and the two of us started chair dancing. The rest of her table caught on and so I had 8 people dancing at me, it was fantastic! Needless to say, that table loved the playlist. Our older guests, not so much

The speeches went really well, despite a slight technical hitch earlier in the day with the projector not working (Dad and best man’s speeches incorporated photos). I can’t wait to see the film because I’ve already forgotten a lot of what was said K

Dinner was over so we did some mingling, then got taken away for 20 minutes to do a few more photos and to breathe. I think this is one of those points I’m most grateful to the TOG and VOG for – we were told just to walk down a field surrounded by daffodils and they left us to it. OH and I just relaxed and were ourselves, it was much needed and I’d thoroughly recommend everyone does it on their wedding day, regardless of what guests think.

We came back to the marquee and all of the evening guests had arrived. I was collared by some of them as OH went in and then the front of house was gesturing for me to come in to cut the cake. The cake topper had started to lean a little so we needed to be careful, but otherwise that went without a hitch. I then made an impromptu speech, which again I hope was on film. I *think* I thanked everyone I should have done and I’m pretty sure I did… but would like to make sure!

Then our first dance! This was one of the bits the OH had been dreading most – he HATES dancing with a passion – but he had chosen the song (‘With my Eyes Open’ by Lonestar) which calmed him down. We shuffled around for the first verse and chorus (I even serenaded him for a little bit!) and then everyone else joined us on the dancefloor.

I sidled off pretty rapido after the second song because my feet were hurting, so headed outside to the van to get my flats and get out of my tights – I was sweating like a pig. Annoyingly, as I got to the van, I heard another JT song come on and I later found out my best friend had requested it specifically for me and when she realised I wasn’t there, absolutely screamed! Ha ha, whoopsies. So anyway, awkward ‘getting out of my tights in a van’ over, I headed back to the marquee and met the TOG and OH coming out to find me. We had a few photos in front of the manor house and then he headed off. VOG was also packing up, so we said our goodbyes and then went back onto the dance floor!

The rest of the evening went by so quickly. I think we did a reasonable job between the two of us of talking to everyone, keeping the dancefloor busy and making sure people were happy. It wasn’t until the last half hour or so I actually got to drinking myself – my cousin very kindly got me a WD40 double shot (a shot of Tequila rose and a shot of black Sambuca mixed) which went down like a lead balloon. Final dance was the Dirty Dancing song ‘I’ve had the Time of my Life’ which I’m not a huge fan of, but we hadn’t requested anything else and it was as good as any to finish on. My final memory of the wedding itself: my mum launching herself into the arms of the best man to try the lift… and then my burly cousin attempting the same once my mum had got down. Hilarious!

People had been creeping off to book taxis from the local firm in the last ten minutes or so before lights up and all of a sudden, everyone was leaving and we hadn’t even stopped to think about how we would be getting to the hotel! (A lot of my family were local, OH’s extended family were staying elsewhere and his parents, sister and the best man were heading back to our house). We quickly called for a cab and headed out with everyone else to the main driveway. We had to grab our bags from one of the cars, so waved everyone off, got our stuff and then got back to the drive just as our taxi rocked up. Gave him a bit of a shock – he was expecting regular guests as opposed to the bride and groom!

Got to the hotel and realised we were staying in one of their honeymoon cottages which was pretty cool. Walked in and saw that our parents had organised for the bed to be decorated in towel animals, confetti and (fake) sunflowers J I quickly jumped into the whirlpool bath and attempted to scrape all the makeup off my face – fake lashes and mascara everywhere!

We stayed up chatting for a bit, then OH passed out and I did the important things: check my phone, change my name on Facebook and then tossed and turned for another couple of hours.

21st April 2016 was very much a special day in our lives and we were truly blown away by everyone’s love and generosity – it’s quite humbling when so many of our friends and family came together to celebrate our love!

For everyone yet to get married, I hope you all have as magical a day as we did.

Well done for getting to the end of this tome, once again I apologise for going on and on and on.

Now, photos:

Mine and SIL's flowers

The ceremony marquee

The party marquee

The cake! Tornado at the top, with me, OH and best man in our car.

Parley Manor. Absolutely beautiful place.

Our hotel bed

Nb. none of these photos were professionally taken. I've stolen them off friends and family.

More pics! More more more. I've laughed, I've cried, I can't believe you went storm chasing I so want to do that. You looked gorgeous and your wedding sounds amazing. Much love to you both for your futures Mr & Mrs Pooba xx

Loved reading your report! Sounds like an amazing day was had :-)

Pooba you had me at being proposed to in front of a tornado!!!

Armchair chaser myself! Sod how long it was....I now feel like you are a girl I could chat to down my local.

You looked beautiful, as did the whole day.

Many, many congratulations xx

What a brilliant report Pooba! Thank you so much for taking the time to write it all out for us... I've laughed and cried in turns and loved every minute of it.... I think you're a strong contender for 'Best Report' or whatever it is!

Love your photos, I do hope you'll come back and share some of your offical ones once you have them... though personally I think guest/family photos often capture the essence of the day better.

I would have loved to have attended your wedding- it all looks amazing and I bet your guests all had a fantastic time!

Congratulations Mrs! ?

HAHAHAHAHAHAAA Pooba, all I can say is, I WISH I knew you!

Brilluant report, amazing photos, lovely wedding

Love a long report! Sounds like an amazing day and you looked beautiful!

Congratulations! Really enjoyed reading your report, made me well up in parts! Helpful info in there as well especially as my day is fast approaching, especially: "I’d organised a playlist to be in the background, but I’d been sorting it out most evenings just as I was going to bed. Music that seems like a good idea at 1 in the morning often doesn’t work in the cold light of day" -good to know because this is exactly what I've been doing late into the night!

You look beautiful, love the pic of you serenading your hubby! And how cool is your cake!

I love Liz Earle products, which ones did you find helped your skin? Been thinking of buying some in the lead up to the wedding so my skin is at its best!

Thanks so much for your kind comments, everybody! I really didn't expect to write so much, but the words just kept on coming ?

Laurensmum - We do a lot of armchair chasing as well. The SPC website is one of my favourites, although I do feel a bit sick when there are warnings out and I'm not there

In the end, we decided not to go storm chasing this year (it's a blooming expensive hobby!) but plan to go again next year.

2BMrsC - we have the professional photos back, but the OH's family haven't seen them yet so we don't want to release any into the wild You're right, though, some of my favourite photos are ones taken by guests!

Justkeepswimming - yeah, the playlist was quite a funny topic for guests. If it's music you like, then keep it in. Maybe try and organise it into a workable order though - we had it on shuffle, hence the really random variation in genre and pace.

I only have the hot cloth cleanser from Liz Earle. It's not a miracle worker (I still have breakouts every so often), but on the whole my skin is a hell of a lot better than it was just a few months ago. It's quite expensive as well (I paid £26 for 200ml), but I was given a free tester beforehand which lasted me a month (long enough for it to start working) so it was worth it to me.

Bravo Pooba! Wonderful report and pictures! You look like so much fun to be around

Oh Pooba, what a fantastic report!!

You look stunning! The Wedding was beautiful!

Congratulations you two!

Pooba, what a wonderful report. No need to apologise about the length at all, I love a long report! You clearly had a beautiful day, glad you enjoyed it all Congratulations x

Fab report, sounds like an amazing day ?