Rant Needed!!

I think people RSVPing or not was one of the most stressful parts of planning my wedding, once I had everyone's yes or no I felt ALOT calmer - I feel your pain!!

I would understand if this was after you'd sent your wedding invitations, but to be honest I wouldn't have expected anyone to RSVP to a STD. They might well have every intention of formally declining after they receive the invite. At least now you know and you can go ahead and invite someone else, or save yourself the money.

We've had people doing this- telling other people, not us, they aren't coming. I was a bit irritated but it's out with my control so have let it go- invites have just gone out so as long as they RSVP then I'm not going to get too upset about it.

I can fully relate to this. My great aunt sent a decline with no note or explanation (If she wasn't a family member then I wouldn't have expected any kind of reason why) so I called my mum and it turns our my aunt had told my nan who had told my mum that she felt it was too far to travel but no one had thought to tell me.

I absolutely don't mind that she isn't coming, I just felt it would have been nice to know why before getting the unexpected decline.

Whilst I would never expect a response to a STD, we've received a number of acknowledgements.

I would think that if they knew they couldn't come, they could have emailed you then to tell you! I totally get you being irritated, but I would look at saving that £200 and buying yourself something nice

xxx

Yup, this! Our RSVP date is Monday and we are still waiting for almost a third of our guests to respond, which is frustrating.

I also had someone who told my parents they had "too much on around that time" after getting their invitation, even though they got a save the date about a year in advance. Fun!

I suppose this would be something they would RSVP about to an invite, not an STD - and would probably do it as soon as they received the invite, which would give you time to invite others.

But I understand that it's frustrating and they probably should have acknowledged the fact they couldn't come to you, because they're certain they won't be there.

Maybe just contact them and double check - it'll save you a little money then.

I've calmed down a little bit now and I understand what a lot of you are saying in regards to people RSVPing to a STD, but with it being my Auntie, and we are a fairly close family, I thought she could of at least given me a heads up, if they knew they definitely couldn't come.

If anything I'm just really gutted they aren't going to be there.

RSVPs are the absolute arse of wedding planning in my book!! Agree with pp that once all mine were back I felt loads better! (That said I had a cancellation with 8 weeks to go today - so actually never certain til the morning!) but ALS I wanted to add really was to speak to your aunt or send the invite anyway - we had a couple who we heard through the grapevine after STD wouldn't be able to come due to a holiday abroad we still sent the invite (we are clo enough we wanted them to have one) along with a few friends who live overseas (Singapore and San Francisco) that we thought wouldn't come, yet RSVPs landed on the doormat and all said yes! Holidays were moved, flights were booked! We were so shocked - delighted but shocked! Maybe they haven't fully decided and your nana has misinterpreted, or maybe she's right - try not to be too worried or let it get to you til you have all the facts - there's plenty of other things to keep your mind occupied, and maybe she hasn't known how best to say it.

xx