Remember to tell you guests no video if you hate been videoed.

I think most people would assume that you'd want a nice reminder of your day that you could look back on. It's not all that different to having your photo taken and I assume you let people do that?

Hi Chickpea,

So sorry to hear about this, I thin if it's something you really hate then it's difficult to not feel very self conscious about it. And I think you have raised a very good point. I absolutely hate my voice on camera, and haven't hired a videographer because of that reason. But I am wondering how you can tell people not to?

As mentioned, I expect a lot of people would think they are being helpful by taping it, and they might not know that we hate being taped, and so how is best to say this without being offensive? Would you ask the registrar to do it?

B x

Aaw what a shame your day was marred by this. To be fair though I think at a wedding you have to expect that people will be taking pictures and video unless you specifically tell them otherwise. Even then I think people will still be clicking away. People want to capture the day not only for you but for themselves as well and constant picture taking is almost a fact of life these days. I do think it's a valid point though to raise for people based on your lesson though. It's easy to assume what you think people will do. Where weddings are concerned however it's clear, you can't assume anything other than people arriving on time, so generally better to make it crystal clear what you do and don't want to avoid such happenings.

Hope you had a fab day in spite of this.

Aww i really feel for you. I'm not having a video for this exact reason. I'm sure there were well meaning thoughts behind it, maybe they were worried you'd regret not having it videoed or your MIL wants to have that memory for herself.

To me video and photos are different. I never wanted my photos to be taken but realised that some people would take my picture and had prepared myself to smile.

I could quite have happily not had any pictures to remember the day by.

I feel it was bad form not to have asked me as everyone knows how self conscious I get it.

Had I known what they had planned or if they has asked me I would have banned them from filming, I needed to be comfortable and relaxed and I wasn't with a camera following my every move.

If you have facebook / wedding website I would mention it on there. As we had said we had not wanted photos being posted till the evening guests arrived.

I would mention it to your family and then maybe ask the best man to mention it just before the ceremony if the registrar/vicar won't.

I feel for you. I HATE having photos taken, or anything where I have to see myself basically. I am having nightmares about our photos because I don't want to ruin them/look awful. We are having a friend video the ceremony though, because as much as I don't like the idea of seeing myself, I think I might regret it if we don't, and I would rather have a video I can delete, than have no video of our day.

That said, I know he is doing it so I am prepared, I would have hated coming in to a surprise camera x

I agree with ravioliruby. I would be mortified if there was a video of me making a fool of myself on the wedding day. My brother filmed (on my phone) me walking down the aisle (no speaking, phew!) but I asked him to so it was fine and I didn't notice him. It was also on my phone so nobody else will ever see it if I don't want them to.

You have my sympathy OP. If I were you I would have a quiet word and ask for the video to be either sent to me and left with me or deleted off the face of the earth.

I hope you still managed to have a good time.

I just don't get why you wouldn't want lasting video / photos of the day. To me apart from actually getting married that's the most important bit! If you're uncomfortable with it then why not just destroy the video?

I do partly agree the lasting memories in the form of a photo or video are important. But as the OP said she didn't ask for this video to be taken. A little bit of warning would have probably been ideal for her and as she didn't want a video she shouldn't have been videod IYSWIM?