RSVP Question/Etiquette?

I think that is a little odd... how are you expected to RSVP if you might not have their address? I suppose you could call them but then they really should have included their phone number at least.

My frend got an invite recently with no rsvp card and when she tried to rsvp byphone the guy said 'thats not got enough, it has to be by post'. I think thats so rude when they havent included a card, she had to go out and buy an rsvp card herself, I think i would have just done it on a scrap of paper! Try and rsvp by phone/text/email/in person and see what they say.Maybe their just expecting a short note through the post, I would never expect people to buy their own rsvp's.

We did this. It cuts the stationary costa in half. RSVP means 'let us know' and it doesn't need to be via a fancy piece of paper. We had RSVP and our address on the reverse of our envelopes. HTH

We also included our wedding website address and we see most of our guests quite a bit.

Right, ok, so I'm not crazy for thinking this is a bit odd. I hate RSVP'ing by phone or text because people don't always have paper on them; you reach them at a bad time; texts expire; etc., so I prefer to send a note or at the very least an email (if they prefer). But, it's a bit hard to do without a return address.

(Also, was wondering, I had heard that in the UK a return address on an invitation meant RSVP requested -- without actually having to write 'RSVP' -- true/not true?)

We didn't include rsvp cards with our wedding invites but I did make sure there was "rsvp" and my email address and phone number. Most people just emailed me back - convenient for all and much less expensive.

For our post wedding party I completely forgot to put rsvp on at all which meant I then had to chase all our guests!!

I'm presuming this is the problem - that they didn't give an address, email address or telephone number to RSVP to? If this is the case, it's obviously an oversight.

If it's just a case that they didn't include an RSVP return card - this isn't necessary.

We did, but only because there was particular information I wanted from my guests and I knew half of them wouldn't provide they returned their own card.

We've got RSVP with my Mum's name, address and phone number. People can RSVP that way. TBH, they could RSVP by stopping me in the street for all I care. As long as we know whether they're coming or not. By putting in a card, they've then got to fork out for a stamp which would cost more than the card in the first place so we're not including them either.

Right, I don't really mind the no card part. I can pop a piece of paper or whatever in the post. It's the no information bit. It truly must be an oversight given their haste. My OH has contacted the groom, so it'll be interesting to see what he says. Also, it looks like from the handwriting that the groom put together the invitation, though it does look like he painstakingly tried his best to write with his most neatest strokes!

No this isn't common...sounds like they just forgot to put their address on the envelope ! I would get their address from a mutual friend and write a note, failing that I think an email is fine...or they may be on facebook,if you're lucky and you can PM them :-)

It's probably an oversight and if it was the groom, asuming he's like mine, being told to "put RSVP on" would literally mean writing RSVP on!

This thread has made me realise though that maybe we need an email address on it too so I've just text my printer lady to see if she's started them yet!

I'd say it's an oversight. No problem with not including an RSVP card - I'd say about half of those I receive have cards supplied and half don't. Doesn't bother me, I'll just go out and buy a card, or use a notecard I already have.

If I were you, I'd just send a text to the bride or groom saying that you have your RSVP ready to send but you don't know where to send it to and can you have their address please?

I think email is great! Environmentally friendly and keeps you from keeping track of yet another piece of paper.

I used to think email was too 'modern' for RSVPs until someone told me that today's 'younger generation' doesn't even have email!!! They say it's for old-timers and that they just use social media now to communicate. Sheesh! Never thought I'd say "Back in the day when we used to email..."

It's either an oversight, or very, very old-fashioned - once upon a time you would just be expected to know where to reply to (or you could always check your copy of Debretts! ?)

We only included RSVP cards because they came free on special offer with our invitations and OoS. We didn't put stamps on them though, and also gave people our e-mail address and phone number so they could reply whichever way they liked. I have previously had invitations with no RSVP card (but always with details!) and will either write a short letter or send an e-mail, depending on what I think the couple might prefer.

Seems very strange to me, but I agree I think it's just an oversight. If you know how to get in touch with them do so. I wouldn't begrudge sending an reply card (acceptance or decline) if the card shops still sell them (they are getting fewer these days! )

I've never had an invite with a prepaid/made RSVP note and have always gone out and bought one myself. Never thought anything of it. We did RSVP at ....wedding website on ours and that was it (but we have a complicated menu they need to choose from!)

I think its very strange. How are you supposed to know dietary requirements, vegetarians, nut allergies, if they need a high chair for a child etc?

We included rsvps with our day invites because of catering requirements. It just seemed the easiest way of dealing with catering numbers and meals.

That said we have had some replies in the form of our rsvps popped inside a shop bought card, just the rsvps on their own, one or two phone calls and a load of people who have yet to reply!! But we have over three months before our wedding and have requested rsvps six weeks before so that gives us time to chase up any stragglers.

As far I'm am concerned if people don't let us know they are coming then they won't get a meal!! They can turn up on the day - but they are in the bar while everyone else has their meal. We are on a tight budget and every penny counts. The evening invites are not such a biggie in my eyes and although we have had a few replies, our catering arrangements are fixed for a certain amount of guests. If the food goes that's it - guests will have to nip off and find a chippy!!

A reply to an invite is such small thing to ask but so many people can't be bothered and it's a real shame.

Swampy

It's 2012 why do u need to use snail mail or have a special card to RSVP......we have not even included our contact details within our invites! I'm not inviting random strangers to my weddings so everyone has our contact details already, Phone, Text, email, facebook, whats app, skype, msn, i could go on.

Personally, I can imagine the inclusion of at least contact details being important for a few reasons, but I'll mention one that applies to especially to me. If the primary invitee is my OH, I guarantee he will not RSVP until you chase him down. He is horrible about it! Thus, it's fallen to me to handle the RSVPs, get the gifts, and so on. If I'm the SO being invited, I probably won't have your contact details and asking my OH for your phone number is fine, but it's a little awkward to call you if I've never met you before! Sure, I could tell him to do it, but again, he procrastinates.