school people, coverr up, sens

In your position I would be speaking to the school, just an informal chat to get their side of the story (IMHO it is your business if what she's saying is true).

You have only spoken to this child's parent and only have her side of the story. There could be a lot more to it.

Well, firstly, you've only actually heard one side of the story so I'd probably start by trying to get a fuller picture. I'd call the school and let them know you'd like to have a private talk to your son's teacher after school one day and take it from there. She probably can't tell you that much because of data protection and the rights of the child/family involved so I'd try and take it in a rational manner and not all guns blazing. Obviously, this is easier said than done because its obviously quite distressing news and you want to find out immediately what's going on.

I'm not sure the school has to let other people know about the situation unless there was a full investigation and the police were involved of anything but I suspect they didn't want the angry parents of 30 children beating a path to their door all at once. You don't know (a) if any abuse has taken place or (b) if it has, what the abuse entailed. Its obviously emotive and its hard to rationalise in these situations but try and stay calm.

Definitely speak to the school to let them know what you have been told. If there have been any allegations of sexual abuse made to social services and/or the police, it will have been investigated. It may be that there was no abuse, or no evidence, or a whole variety of outcomes. The school have clear legal procedures on what they should do if there is an allegation of abuse and 'refusing to do anything about it' is not an option. If the mother was not satisfied with the school's repsonse, she could have gone to Social Services or the police. Do you know if this happened? The head doesn't have a duty to inform parents, that would be a police decision. The head has a duty to refer it to the Children Services team at Social Services.

Don't panic - go and see the head to discuss your concerns.

Mmm, tricky one....a child in my class was removed from the school as the parent claimed the child was being abused by others. In fact, the allegation arose from children (7yrs old) playing one game in the playground which involved trying to flash each others underwear to the others. Unpleasant maybe, but not what I would call sexual abuse. The parent told all and sundry that the child was being abused but clearly this was not the case, it was never reported to any authority for example.

I am not of course saying this is the same but I would think if any serious abuse had taken place the school would have to inform parents.

OK - My first thought, if my child had been sexually abused, I would not be making it known. I'd be keeping quiet for my childs sake, If another Parent talks about this with their own child in ear shot, how do you know it won't be repeated again in school. ETA: I would notify school, SS & Police.

From what I understand going by something currently hapening with a child in my Daughters school, the school would do something about it, the incidents that has happened at our school will result in the child being removed if it does continue to happen.

If it's happening off school premises, little they can do.

Thank you. i think it helps to share and get a rationale side. the mum wasnt in ear shot of her child or mine, it was just us. she did say they had informed social services.

i think a chat with the teacher in private might just ease my mind, like said causing world war three would not help anyone when i dont know exactly what went on. what the mum said wasnt anything like a flashing underwear game. it was a threat and then action.

it is just a bit of a shock that the idea of something like this might happen in our school.

FWIW I would go to the headteacher, not the class teacher. The class teacher would have to take this kind of thing straight to the head anyway and the head is usually the person with a responsilbity for child protection so would be most likely to a) know the facts and b) know what to tell you. HTH.

Oops - duplicate post.

OK, this is obviously a serious case, in which case I would be looking to ask questions too. I would be more inclined to go to the Head aswell.

Thank you, i think i will make an appointment to see the head.

she always seems to have the knack of making me feel like i have done something wrong. i dont know why.

Thank you, i think i will make an appointment to see the head.

she always seems to have the knack of making me feel like i have done something wrong. i dont know why.

Takes years of practice that!

Remember you are going to share the information you have heard (i'm sure the school would want to know what the parent is saying about their procedures) and request any information that is relevant to you and your child. That is perfectly reasonable and I think as long as you go in there calmly, stating the facts as you have heard them, the head should understand that. Write down the points you want to make if you like - that way you won't forget anything. Good luck!

A school wouldn't cover up a criminal act they would call the police immediately