Should we send the invitations out?

You need to decide if you're going to postpone or not. If not, send them out.

My dad was diagnosed with terminal cancer shortly after I got engaged first time round and we brought the wedding forward a year to try and have him there. We talked about what we'd do if he died before the date and decided we'd go ahead anyway; it's a cliche, but he would have wanted us to.

It's a horrible time. Sending good wishes your way.

I'm sorry to hear your sad situation.

A friend of mine got married a couple of years Ago, her dad was terminally ill with cancer and they hoped she would still be there for the day. She died 6 weeks before, and then out of the blue her mum died a fortnight later. Amazingly they went ahead, I couldn't believe it at the time, but it was a beautiful day and seemed like the right thing. I think the above poster is right, just decide either way, but if he will look forward to it and it will give some meaning and some hope to his last months it sounds like it would be lovely to just get on with it and hope for the best x x

It will be incredibly hard, but I would go through with it. Getting the invitation might perk him up a little, especially if fmil is asking the oh to send them. I don't think he would want you postponing things and grieving when you could be getting married and hopefully bringing some joy to a sad time. It might help people get through it - remembering a good time with a bad one.

I will have lost my dad nigh on 13 years when I get married next year, the OH will have lost his 10, and it will be difficult them not being there even after that long, so I really feel for you. Big hugs x

Were in a sort of similar situation (we new she had cancer but didn't no there was so little time) but it's now my mums mission to make it to the wedding no matter what, it's a big aim and it stops us being as morbid, so if you can talk to him, he might be looking forward to it and be upset if you cancel. And if you decide to go ahead with it just get the invites sent, there's nothing wrong with doing things that make you happy if your comfortable with it, no normal person will think your doing anything wrong

Were in a sort of similar situation (we new she had cancer but didn't no there was so little time) but it's now my mums mission to make it to the wedding no matter what, it's a big aim and it stops us being as morbid, so if you can talk to him, he might be looking forward to it and be upset if you cancel. And if you decide to go ahead with it just get the invites sent, there's nothing wrong with doing things that make you happy if your comfortable with it, no normal person will think your doing anything wrong

Firstly big hugs! Personally I would send them and continue with the wedding. When my mum was diagnosed as terminal we used to plan things and give her things to focus on. It did her the world of good and kept her going at times.

I would imagine FFIL would want to be there for you and OH, I would take your lead from FMIL she's the one who will mostly likely be aware of what he wants even if he struggles to talk about it to everyone else.

I don't think anyone can put an true estimate on how long, it may just be the thing that keeps him going. Ultimately though you both have to be comfortable with what you decide. You don't want a sad day, but at the same time it may bring happiness at a sad time. You have to look at realities, what if he doesn't make it? How would you OH cope! Could you cancel/re-arrange at late notice. I couldn't have gone through with a wedding, I was exhausted and ill for months, but everyone's different. Xxx

Ahh I'm sorry to hear your sad news. I agree with what's been said......you need to decide if you will still go ahead with the wedding if he passes away before. If so then send them out. if the answer is no, I personally would bring the wedding forward to ASAP or postpone it for a year or so.

Thank you everyone for your advice, i really appreciate it. We have decided to go ahead with the wedding and will be sending the invitations out this weekend.