Step-mother of the bride outfit update

Oh no. Hopefully you will find THE outfit today.
Have you let the shops bring you things, rather than choosing yourself? I am not sure what's best. I am sure I would hate whatever was suggested to me ?

Also, you say 'in your opinion'. Are you in a 'nothing will ever suit me' mindset? Because if you are, I think you're screwed, matey

L
xx

I'm screwed! ?

I knew it! You need to believe you can look fab. I don't know why you don't believe this, tbh, there is nothing to suggest otherwise, except in your head.

Go Peaches, Go Peaches, Go Peaches

L
xx

I think the white trousers / lovely jacket combo sounds really perfect. Try it again, with the right accessories I think it could be exactly what you're looking for.

Peaches, do you want me to recce the Bicester Village shop for you still? It's on my list of things to do today or tomorrow. Lois-the-stalker has given me your email addy so I can report back direct to you.

? PMSL at your cheerleading! Want some pom-poms to go with that?! They are 10 a penny at Academy (if you want to see THE most fantastic sports/outdoor shop, Academy is it!) I'll take you there! ?

Thanks for the vote of confidence ? (or should that be ?? lol)

I've only been to one wedding where I felt fantastic, and that was when I'd got to goal and was a skinny minny. I'm a far cry from that now, sadly. Hey ho .. it's in my head as you said (and on my arse, and hips, and thighs ?)

I am not a stalker. I am a stalker facilitator. Helping put innocents and nutter stalkers together.

Peaches, meet PL. Which is the innocent and which is the nutter stalker, tbc

L
xx

I don't think you're any bigger than me though, are you Peaches? I can definitely look good with the right budget/outfit (and low lighting ?)

L
xx

Lois makes a good point [looks for slippers pattern]

What wouldn't work would be me trying to help Peaches find an outfit at the Vallarge de Bicester. Given my inability to find wedding outfits either ?

Because I am a skint tight arse, I have never bought any clothing at Bicester. Does it have shops that fit people over a size 14? I always assume they won't have anything big enough and if they do I can't afford it. Except for jewellery, they have gorgeous jewellery now

L
xx

Hello Sunshine - seriously, the jacket and trouser combo really did look hideous. I know what looks good and what doesn't, despite my huge arse and tits, but this did me no favours whatsoever. And it would have seriously damaged the bank account as it was $1400 just for the jacket, never mind the rest, plus the accessories and upholstery! Even if it had looked nice (which it really didn't - I have photographic evidence!), I didn't feel good in it. I was way out of my comfort zone in it, and would have felt awkward all day & night.

PL, that's really kind of you. Thank you. If you're going anyway, I'd really appreciate if you could look in that shop Maxi recommended. It needs to be something 'special', not something that could be worn as an every-day item.

I don't want to dress as a Mother of the Bride, but I want to look like I've made an effort. I found many outfits yesterday which would have 'done', but none were special if you know what I mean. I looked like I was a well dressed lady-wot-lunches in some of the outfits. I don't want that look .. it has to be fitting for the occasion. I have to say that I also looked like a dish-cloth in many more of the outfits! And that wasn't just MY opinion lol!

You're all really kind. Thank you ?

Anything here?

https://www.condici.com/

Waah, just seen this! Lois, have you met PL? Did you make slippers out of her?

Tilly, I've been to one of their stockists and the largest size they did was a 12, and even that was frowned upon ? Lovely outfits though, and thanks for looking.

Lois, yes of course I'm bigger than you! Tsk! You're positively tiny in comparison!! You're a pathetic example of a slipper stalker .. I'd only get a pair and half out of you. Me, on the other hand, could start a factory.

The shop I was thinking of was Nitya, I have bought wide leg floaty trousers/camisole/little jacket from there before, they also have quite a lot of long tops over trouser type outfits. Definitely not everyday clothes IMO, I wore my outfit for dinner at Hartwell House.

That might be the stockist though, my mum's MOB outfit from them was a 16.

I've met Lois a few times, and neither of us have slipper shapes cut from our backs yet. She did a fine job in trying to help me get a wedding outfit last year. Failed dismally but it was fun trying. In the event I managed to get something that made me look sh1t all by myself ?

I'll have a look at that shop - can you remember what it's called? I never shop in BV, it's my idea of hell, so I can't really suggest any other shops that might have things to suit you there.

See above! Nitya! I love BV, sad cow that I am and could probably name most of the shops there but I dont know what would suit Peaches, designer-wise.

See above! Nitya! I love BV, sad cow that I am and could probably name most of the shops there but I dont know what would suit Peaches, designer-wise.

It's a nightmare and I'm totally with you on your predicament. Even if they weren't the right cut / shape though, I think that *kind* of thing should be the way you go. Are you getting some sort of head gear/ hat? That can make even the most simple outfit fantastic.

Right, I'm a fat old trout. Can I help?

What size are we actually talking? We can 'conversation' (top right) if you'd rather keep it secret (you tell me yours, I'll tell you mine ?. There are some good shops down here in Brighton for the larger-but-not-bloody-past-it lady. Let me help you.

I'm going for large flowing tops with palazzo pants at the moment, from a shop up north. Some of the stuff is utterly ick, but the top I had from them rocks (I wore it to a christening at the crypt in the House of Lords) and I'm about to buy another to do two weddings. I may buy a racy fascinator too. That way it's all about colour and flow and movement, and less about the size of my arse.

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ladies-dress-mother-of-the-bride-size-22-nwot-evie_W0QQitemZ330328206629QQcmdZViewItemQQptZWomen_s_Clothing?hash=item330328206629&_trksid=p3286.c0.m14&_trkparms=72%3A1685%7C66%3A2%7C65%3A12%7C39%3A1%7C240%3A1318%7C301%3A0%7C293%3A1%7C294%3A50

Sorry, on phone to UK trying to avert a tenant crisis. Jeez, these houses will be the death of me 😠

I'm on hold, so might post mid-type if they come back to me ...

Ok, things sorted back there. Now onto more pressing and important issues! JK .. "fat old trout" 😆 I bet you're none of those! But it made me smile lol, so thanks for that. I'm going to go to Nordstrom today. I would have gone yesterday but I ran out of time, and indeed energy. We had a meeting with the builders last night so I couldn't stay in the Galleria (huge shopping mall Downtown) and had to come home, so I'll go again after my foot physio. These are some of the things I'll be looking at .. particularly this although I'm not 100% about that either

I can't find any trouser suits or mix & match items on their website, so I'll ask when I get there.

Can't begin to tell you how much I hate being this size. Hate, hate, hate it, especially as I now know what it looks and feels to be a size 4 US. I can't bring myself to throw all the clothes away and accept that I'll never be that size again. It's really not doing me any good at all, but no matter how much I try, I just can't lose much weight. It's soul destroying, especially living here where it's so hot and I can't 'hide' under big floppy sweaters. I'm so tempted to go back on a VLCD as it was the only thing that worked, but I know it made me sicker than I already am, so it's just not an option.

Ok, enough self-pity. Going to put my gym stuff on and do some exercise to cheer me up.

I've missed the specific reason for MOTB outfits, but I can't help but respond. All of those outfits (without exception) should not be worn on anyone under the age of 65. Is there a good reason they need to look like that?

There seem to be some much more flattering outfits/dresses on the the "Day Occasion" tab for plus-sizes.

Sorry if I've missed something very obvious, and I don't mean to be horrible, but I can't see how you WOULD feel good about yourself if you were to dress 30 years older than you are?

Tilly, that's lovely, but not quite 'me', and perhaps just a size or 2 too big. Then again, I range between 4 sizes depending on the cut, so it might be fine. I'd prefer to go to a store and try on rather than online as nothing ever looks the same on as it does in the pictures (both better as well as worse).

Interesting looking at her other items for sale though. Range from size 8 to 22 - often saying the same thing "bought the wrong size". How very odd to be so far out!! ?

Https://www.jdwilliams.co.uk/

https://www.jdwilliams.co.uk/

Https://www.jdwilliams.co.uk/

I think this one could look under oapish,

http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/3025477/0~2376776~2374327~6007059~6007112~6016844?mediumthumbnail=Y&origin=category&searchtype=&pbo=6016844&P=1

don't know if it's your kind of thing? It is special enough without tipping into utter frumpshire, imo

Actually, I think they'll have some great things there. I love some of the dresses they have

L
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I'm about to be step-mother of the bride, and fast running out of time to find something.

I'm 44, so sadly not quite the 30 years under 65, but have the mentality of an 80 year old when it comes to dressing for special occasions. I think I'm ok day-to-day, but lose it when finding something 'special'. Don't know why.

Can't wear anything with arms showing due to bingo wings.

Can't wear anything with back showing due to awful skin.

Can't wear anything shorter than just-above-ankle due to hideous legs.

Due to foot surgery I'll have to wear flats or near as dammit flat shoes which are comfortable otherwise I'll be in agony. Also, my foot is still very swollen, so anything that cuts in will hurt like hell. Strappy sandals are out.

Hence looking at trouser suits as they seemed to fit the bill all round, but nothing I've found so far is right. You'd think that in such a hot climate they'd have nice flowly outfits, wouldn't you?

I'm screwed, as Lois said

You're not screwed, I have now decided, because the shops you have left to look at are good propositions. If I were you I would be blunt with the assistants and say 'look, I need a MOB type outfit, but I am not 106 and nor do I wish to look it, so please can you help me choose something young?'

L
xx

I couldn't agree more. Forgive me Peaches but you aren't collecting your bus pass yet are you, so why dress like someone who is? Honestly those outfits are just really ol and really frumpy.

A quick look in the dress section and there are some much nice dresses

https://www.nordstrom.com

Number 2 for a start, the purple floral number half way down the page, and this one http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/3020361/0~2376776~2374327~6007059~6007112~6010558?mediumthumbnail=Y&origin=category&searchtype=&pbo=6010558&P=2

http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/2971218/0~2376776~2374327~6007059~6007112~6010558?mediumthumbnail=Y&origin=category&searchtype=&pbo=6010558&P=4

Lois, I did that yesterday LOL. I was quite assertive, and actually surprised myself at how positive I was, and actually walked out of one shop because they wouldn't help me! (they were busy with brides, but hell, I'm important too!) ?

The woman in Saks (Sissy IIRC) was wonderful. She really went to town and I felt bad walking out empty handed. She kept bringing me outfits to try on, and some were truly lovely, just not on me, or for the occasion. I might actually go back and get some of them but not for the wedding.

KB3, all the ones you listed I've looked at and dismissed for reasons stated above .. arms, back, legs, foot, flat shoes.