Surnames - old or new?!

I'm taking hubby's name. We both have quite regular names but we have a son who has my OH's name and I can't wait until we all have the same surname

I'm a Davies too!! I had considered double barrelling but OH wasn't keen, I'll be embracing the new surname. Just not looking forward to the paperwork!

I'm taking his name, never wanted to keep or double barrel it although I can see why some people do.

I'm taking my partners name - despite being quite fond of my own name! His is a fairly regular English name and my last name is awesomely belgian lol... I do like the idea of taking your partners name and becoming a family though.

I double-barrelled first time around, I wasn't ready to let go of my surname for personal reasons to do with my parents. In the end DB-ing was a huge pain in the bum, and I was happy to revert

This time I was full-on GIVE ME YOUR NAME! I wanted to be Mrs [his name] in every sense. Especially as we hope to have children, it seemed much, well, tidier. ?

I kept mine. It was never an option for me to change, and not an issue for Boy - in fact, he suggested that he couldn't imagine marrying the type of girl who would I appreciate that might offend some of you, but he was just trying to approve of my feminist independence!

I use the title "Dr", which had admittedly made it much easier to deal with the Miss/Mrs/Ms issue. When I have to select one of the latter, I never know which one to go for ?

I changed mine but I wish I hadn't. It's kind of too late to put it back and I personally don't like double barreling. To me it's someone trying to sound aristocratic. I wish I had given it a bit more thought.

Duplicate

I'm changing mine to my h2b's surname completely. I'm very attached to my surname, especially as I'm one of two girls so our name will end. It's fairly unusual in England (it's an Irish name). Some women at work keep their maiden name for work reasons but I'd get too confused so Mrs S for me!

I'm changing mine for things outside of work. My OH really wants me to, he wants us to have the same surname and when we have kids to all have the same name. I appreciate that and do think that's nice, but it doesn't bother me as much because I have a different surname to my mum. I will be quite sad to lose my last name as its part of my identity and I also prefer my name! But at work I'm 'Dr' and will definitely keep my surname for this as its the name I qualified with and it feels wrong to change that! So I guess it's a bit of a compromise.

I changed mine. Definitely wouldn't double barrel, if you have children how does it work?! What name would they have?

There is part of me though, like Mini, that wonders whether I should have thought about it a bit more and kept my maiden name.

I'm considering keeping my maiden name professionally, as I will be Dr too in a year or so. Complication is that H2B is already Dr so when mail arrives for Dr [his surname] we won't know who it's for ;-) So thinking I could be Dr [maiden name] at work, Mrs [his surname] at home??? Honestly... First world problems.... Pffff.

If I do take his name I'm going to change my name by deed poll to have my maiden name as an additional middle name (kind of like double-barrelling, but not really!)

This is a fab idea! I've thought about doing it as a middle name if we have a baby. My maiden name is a boys or girls first name (albeit very unusual and quite American!) but hadn't thought about doing it to my name!

Hehe. Are you opposed to keeping your maiden name for everything?

You don't have to change your name by deed poll, or so my married friends say? OM is this correct??? My mum suggested keeping Davies for work, as that's how I'm known, but my job isn't the type where your name is important (e.g. teacher, doctor, writer etc) so changing my name at work would be really straightforward...plus my first name is relatively unusual for girls my age (although it's now v v v popular for little girls/babies) so I rarely come across anyone my age with the same first name!

Taking OH's surname..actually can't wait to get rid of my own haha I hate it!

I'm taking my OHs.

I always wanted to get rid of my surname as its a bit awkward and I hate spelling it but as soon as I got engaged I became attached to it and in some ways be sad to no longer have my family name.

If you take his name and lose yours = no deed poll required.

If you double-barrel, with or without a hyphen (where the latter would render your maiden name as an extra middle name) - you may need a deed poll for some institutions.

If he takes on your name in any way, shape or form - deed poll required for him.

That's a bit sexist really!!! Like it's expected for the woman to take the mans name...which tbh I guess it is, even in 2013.

Oh yeah, I am the same in work as I've always been. I forgot about that. So I use both.

My ex-husband and I both double-barrelled, we used the marriage cert and got passports, bank accounts, everything switched with no bother at all. That was 17 years ago.

Indeed. Why did you think some women refused to take their husband's name?

Absolutely taking his surname. His ex wife refused and made him take her name, so I'll be his first (and only!) Mrs Tew :-)

I took my exHs name last time, already double barrelled by his parents so I was Mrs FIL-MIL. When we divorced I changed my name by deed poll to Miss FIL.

It doesn't feel like a feminist issue to me really. It's my choice, I don't feel like I should do it, I want to do it. It's not even about being a unit as my children are still double barrelled and his children have his ex wife's name. To me it's just a tradition that I want to continue.

I was quite attached to my old name but equally I quite liked the idea of having a new name. My maiden name was quite unique (made up on a boat fleeing some pesky nazis) so will be giving it as a middle name to any kid we have, as well as my grandparents' surname to other kids we may have.

The problem I will have is my h's surname is a girl's name. So I get called that as my first name now all the time, and if we have any boys I'm going to have to think of some seriously masculine names so people don't call him our surname (my H has this problem now)

I'm keeping my name. I've never even considered changing it tbh. It's something that's never really been up for discussion.

H2B couldn't care less though and thinks he has a "crap" surname anyway (his words). His immediate family on the other hand didn't seem overly impressed when he told them so ?

If Im honest Ive not even gave this a thought. I always knew I would take my H2B name....we have a child with his name and id love for us all to have the same name. Plus my surname, while unusual, is awful and people always spell it wrong! OH name is sooo simple that there is no way to get it wrong

xxx

I'm taking my OHs surename, I also am one of 2 girls so my surename will be lost (mind u i dont think my sis will ever marry!)

But I think like others well do my sure name as a middle name or first as its Daniel - so can be done!

This is a bit of sticking point for us. I'm really really not keen on changing my name but I have a very traditional OH who really wants us to both have his name (though he's obviously said it's my decision).

Weirdly, never considered I'd do anything but take my OH's name but it turns out I do care. A lot. I've had my name for almost 30 years, for me it's a big part of who I am and I don't really want to change that.

I also love my surname, it's a nod to my Irish roots, it's unusual and I also have an unusual first name and the two go well together - my OH's name doesn't sound very good with my first name and it just doesn't feel like me. He's surname is also very popular and I'm not really keen on it. I'm personally not keen on double-barrelling names so this is out of the question for me.

I do however think it's nice to all have the same surname if we have children. Also, as I don't really know what to do with the Miss/Mrs thing (I hate Ms!). So really not sure what to do!!

At the moment I'm thinking that I might leave it as it is and if we're lucky enough to have children in the future, then I would maybe consider changing my name then. Will continue to think about it up until getting married but don't want to rush into changing it and regretting it later.

Out of interest, those who didn't/aren't planning to change it. Do you have/or are planning to have children and if so what did you/do you plan to do for their surnames?

Ill be taking his name. I can't wait to be shot of mine. It's very unusual, it's my Father's surname and very common in Ireland (apparently) but nt in England. Tbh it just remind me of my deadbeat dad. Almost took my step day's when Mum got remarried but now ill just take OH's. very common but I don't care!

This is one of the biggest debates between me and OH. I would like to keep my surname as my first and middle names are very unusual and I think they sound odd with his more common surname. However, I wouldn't expect him to take my name and he doesn't expect me to take his, but I know it would make him very happy if I did.

To those OMs who kept their name, did you get many people making awful comments? OH is concerned about having to keep explaining why we kept separate names.

I don't think my OH would even marry me if I wasn't going to take his name! :-/

That's pretty sad.

I changed mine for everything - I didn't like my old name as it was the source of lots of cruel jokes and nicknames when I was younger. H was pleased that I chose to do this, but would never have dreamed of trying to make me or emotionally blackmail me into it. I use Dr/Ms as a title though, I don't like Mrs, plus Mrs B is my mother-in-law!