Thank you's

I have no idea, but am commenting to see what other people say!! I want to know the answer to this!

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I'm not sure what the 'proper' thing to do is but I guess for me it would depend on who they were! So if someone had mada a huge effort to get there - maybe travelled from afar and had to pay hotels etc - I'd probably want to thank them for coming and making such an effort!

But if it was a mate from round the corner I'd probably just tell them thanks for coming next time we caught up over a glass of wine!

This kinda makes sense. Still feels weird if I don't send a thank you though (to the "locals") ?

I think traditionally the guests are supposed to thank the hosts (and the hosts thank the givers of gifts). However thank you letters for visits are not that common any more so it didn't feel appropriate to us to expect them.

I'm sending thank yous to everyone because it felt right to me. (We asked for no gifts although many gave them anyway, and most guests had to travel a long way and stay 2 nights)

We are going by the "better to give thanks that were not needed than to miss those that were" rule.

For me it would probably depend on whether I had spoken to them much on the day - if I had, I would guess I would have thanked them for coming. If I'd already done that in person, I don't think I'd send a thank you card to just repeat the same thing, if there was nothing else I needed to thank them for (sorry, I think that sounds more ungrateful than I mean it!). But if I hadn't had a chance to speak to them throughout the day, I would be more likely to consider sending a card.

If guests have travelled a long way to be there, that's probably something to consider too.

We have just sent ours out and as a general rule have only sent them to people who got us a gift. A couple of people (OH's sister and one of my oldest friends) travelled a long way, so I have sent them one to thank them for coming even though they didn't get us a gift. It's a personal judgement call really. I sent a blanket email to everyone at work to thank them as I thought individual cards was overkill.