The Venue Search

As we live 6 hours from the city where we wanted to get married, our initial searching was done on the internet. I scoured websites which list venues, which is how we found our first venue for the dinner/reception. We went to look at it, loved it, provisionally booked it, but then later changed our minds. It had a minimum number that we just couldn't meet without inviting people who neither of us really wanted. And even with that minimum, the place was so large (max it could hold is over 300!), we thought the room would just feel cavernous and we wanted a more intimate feel.

Choosing the replacement venue was really difficult, as we loved the first place, and nothing else we'd looked at compared. And the websites which list venues didn't have anything that we wanted within what we were willing to spend. So, the next thing I did was just start Googling and searching wedding blogs and wedding photography blogs. That's how we ended up finding our venue, and we absolutely LOVE it!

There are many venues that don't advertise on wedding websites, so the only way to find these are through word of mouth or by looking around. By the way, I will say that initially my HTB had his heart set on a castle or grand estate venue. But, when we started looking around, we discovered that these really didn't fit in with our style and what we wanted out of our day. So, my best bit of advice would be to keep an open mind! (Though a barn wedding sounds awesome, and we would've loved to have had one -- just couldn't find one within striking distance of our ceremony venue!)

Hi,

We seemed to go around loads of places before we settled on what we wanted. Originally we wanted a stately home type place but found many of them couldn't fit our day time numbers or didn't offer the facilities we wanted (to be able to stay the night before and night of the wedding).

We did provisionally book the place we fell in love with but I started to get uneasy about it when things weren't sounding right. Plus they wanted a £3k deposit and we couldn't find any reviews about them on any of the sites which made us suspicious.

So we decided to look at a place we randomly found on the net to see how we felt and we loved it there. Their approach was so much better than some places. They had a proper bar (some places we looked at served beer out of cans) and they would stock the bar with whatever we wanted. We could have exclusive use due to the number we were having to the day and the prices were reasonable to stay overnight and the food prices were very reasonable and the food is 5 stars. It is predominantly a hotel which we didnt look at at first but maybe try somewhere you wouldn't have thought of at first and see how you feel about that.

My SIL2B is getting married a year after us and they would like a barn setting in between where the 2 families are from but they are struggling too with numbers and the feel of the place.

Don't give up there will be one place out there which is the one.

x

God. took me ages.

I originally tried to please the i laws, as he is from N.wlaes and me south. so i tried to find a place in the mdidle but failed miserably.

i also knew i didnt want a church wedding, but i did want a unique place, not just a cream room in a hotel. I went to several places and LOVED 2 of them, but h2b just wasnt feeling the love. we then had to put it on hold because he had to go to Iraq. eventually i decided i was going to look in Cardiff, and saw about 5 venues in 1 day! But price dictated that some were out.

It was purely by chance i found ym venue, as my dad used to guard it and said 'its a shame they dont do weddings'. googled it and they did. they had just re-furbed and were offering an amazing deal too!!

Google is your best friend. but use loads of different searches, as some of these places aren't on the big sites and you will need to find them on your own.

where do you live? What sort of budget do you have?

ETA fate has stepped in, and 2 of my would be venues have since gone bust. lucky escape.

Hi MAG2FMC,

Oh wow, that must have been hard living so far from the ideal location, but hurrah for the internet

What is the venue you've chosen like? A castle sounds incredible, and I like the idea of looking round and seeing what it could be like, but I can't imagine us ever getting married somewhere so grand. When is your wedding? How is the planning going?

I think I'm quite worried about the minimum guest number to be honest. We're planning on an initimate civil ceremony with just our immediate family (parents, brothers, sisters and their partners, nieces and nephews). I think there will be 15 of us in total - and then for the evening we would have all our friends and wider family. It sounds perfect to us, just hope we find somewhere we like that can cater for this too...

xx

Thanks Lydeep - Its good that you went with your gut instinct and didn't keep the one you weren't positive about, and it sounds as though you've found somewhere much better suited.

I think its the same situation with houses - you can find the perfect place in the wrong location. If only you could pick them up and move them - bliss. Wouldn't that make wedding planning so much easier?!

I loved the idea of being beside water, but finding a barn that's affordable, in that setting, that has the right atmosphere and would cater for our intimate ceremony and larger party.... Argh! We'll get there.... Glad we set a date two years away, hehe!

xx

There will be a venue that will be perfect for you and will cater for what you want.

how far are you willing to travel?

Our venue is about an hour away but 3 hrs or so from the north family. but its a castle and couldnt be happier!!

Hi Beth,

Wow, that was a lucky escape - if its right though, it'll happen.... Everything happens for a reason

Live in Sandhurst and would like somewhere fairly close to home if possible, but willing to travel around 30-40 minutes. Quite lucky as we border Berkshire, Surrey and Hampshire, and Oxfordshire falls just within reach too.

I found a few lovely places online today which we're hoping to look at (links below) so just waiting to see what H2B thinks.

http://www.oldluxtersbarn.co.uk/weddings_civil_ceremonies.php

http://www.rivervale-barn-weddings.co.uk/index.asp

http://www.bijouweddingvenues.co.uk/cain-manor/index.php

http://www.thetythebarn.co.uk/home.html

Oh wow, its so hard trying to please everyone... Especially parents and in-laws. I think its important though to go with what you both want as its your day afterall. Unfortunately my sister wasn't so lucky... Her in-laws live on Isle of Wight, and are rarely seen. When they announced their engagement they said they wanted a small wedding, and then they received an email from hubby's parents... You need to invite X, Y and Z to the wedding, and we think your brother should be the best man blah, blah... Surprisingly they did as they were told and had the brother as best man, and the wedding escalated in size to accompany everyone. It was still a fantastic day and they're happily married now - just a shame hubby's family are on bad terms with them - they rarely even visit their granddaughter (although they're happy to see hubby's brother's family). Just shows, even if you do it their way for the day, it doesn't mean it will be plain sailing after.

xx

We started looking at venues in April last year and booked our venue in November so around 8 months. Although the venue we booked was actually the first venue we viewed.

I found it helpful to do a few second viewings as sometimes you see the venue in a different light.... with a more practical head on.

That's a good idea.... Just need to find a venue we want to look round twice, haha!

What's yours like? xx

Thetythe barn is lovely.. they all are!!

You'll get frustrated with it, but eventually you will find a perfectly located, beautiful, well priced venue and it will all fall into place!

We only having an intimate wedding close friends and family (Approx 30 guests daytime, 50 evening) we wanted a hotel so we can have everything in one space but you have no idea how hard it is to find nice small function rooms that are not too corporate! We were also torn between a city wedding (we live in London) or escaping to the country so we viewed a selection of both.

we opted for a city wedding and our venue is The Dorchester https://www.dorchestercollection.com/london/the-dorchester

A close second for us was https://www.dorchestercollection.com/ascot/coworth-park in Ascot the tower house has a barn type feel perfect for intimate weddings and the most beautiful wild flower medow...it really was at the top end of our budget though so we ruled it out in the end....if its near you go have a look or go for lunch i had the best steak i have ever eaten in the'drawing room' after our show around!

3rd was https://aviatorhampshire.com/ very classy but lacking outside space and was concerned it might be a bit too far for us and our guests to travel so ruled it out.

We also viewed https://www.handpickedhotels.co.uk/woodlandspark which was nice and can cater for smaller weddings.

Good luck with your search.

Hi Klr291!

All your venues look so lovely! And you must live very very close to me! We're in Oxfordshire, about a 20-25 minute drive from downtown Oxford. There are some GORGEOUS venues around here -- would have loved to have gotten married closeby, but HTB and I wanted somewhere with a bit more of a connection (neither of us are from Oxfordshire).

The ceremony venue we've chosen is my HTB's university's chapel. We're not religious, but thankfully, they allow humanist ceremonies! The reception venue is a private members club that allows outside bookings. They have a room that is filled with paintings, which makes it very eclectic looking but homey at the same time. Wedding is in July, and while the major bits are done, it's all the smaller bits that seem to take so long!

I'm sure you'll find a venue that suits you perfectly!!!

Your venue is gorgeous. What time of year is it booked for? I'm sure it will look incredible!

Coworth Park is gorgeous, but way out of our price range too The Aviator is really cool. I used to work just round the corner and really love the idea of actually staying there - but doesn't seem much point when we live 20 mins away, LOL. Never even thought of there for a wedding either. Would be really cool.

Ooh, I'm looking into Woodlands Park further, not heard of there before.

Thanks for your help xx

Hiya Mag,

No, can't be far at all...! Love Oxford... Wish we could live nearer there, and I did look at one point, but we live within 15 mins of all our family here, so seemed silly to move Still, we've just bought (well, in process of buying) a gorgeous three storey town house. I currently live in H2Bs house, so this is our marital home to be... FINGERS CROSSED we'll be moving in June. Eek!

Oh wow, sounds like a fantastic venue, never imagined they'd let non-religious ceremonies go ahead in somewhere like that, knowing how they can be about it all... July, eek! That's going to come around soon. Are you traditional and marrying on a Saturday? H2B and I decided that we had to get married on 18th of the month as we met that day, and it needed to be in the summer. It means we're getting married on a Friday. Initially didn't like that idea, but the more I think about it, the more I'm happy with that decision.

What style of wedding are you going for? xx

We only started looking at venues in February and then booked it in March - looked at lots online but only viewed 2. The first one was already booked for our date and the second one is where we're getting married ? we're both from the countryside so wanted lots of fields and a nice big manor house sort of thing as our backdrop! Went for Rothley Court in Leicester. In our area though there really wasn't anything within our budget that ticked the right boxes (so we didnt have much choice to pick from anyway!) and Rothley Court is still 50 minutes away! If you have lots of choice I would definitely take the time to visit each place and make a list of pros and cons for each one!! 2014 is still 2 years away so we have the luxury of being able to take our time with choices ?

We've been looking since 29 feb since we got engaged and we cant find the perfect place. Was looking for something different/usual or something that is stunning and everything is disappointing!!!! We have looked in our local area and within a 20 mile radius of our home done loads of travelling but cant find anything! We went to a friends wedding recently and realised that the venue is not the most important thing the bit in the church is, so think we are going for a local hotel which is very nice but not the special venue i thought we originally wanted. Good luck with ur search x

Don't get despondent, and like you said, its not everything. As long as you can put your 'stamp' on it, it will be great.

xx

It took us 1 visit! i looked around and reseacrhed them all first for a couple of weeks, but only came up with 2 choices as there arent many venues where we live where i haven't already been to a wedding. then we went to visit our first choice and i cried when i went outside to the grounds. that was it - decision made ? here is a picture of the tear inducing view
:

It's been a blinking nightmare! looked at around 12/13 venues...think we have found the one but still need to discuss prices etc we have found it very hard to find somewhere we like and can do what we want in our budget!! x

Jaw dropping! I'm not surprised that brought tears!!! I'm so jealous... Fingers crossed for beautiful sunshine and sunsets. You'll get amazing photos too! xx

Yes the hotel rooms/suites (Aviator) were lush we are contemplating a weekend there at some point as they do some good deals.

We getting hitched September 2013.