Top Table Planning Trouble

Can your mother cope with your future mother in-law? could keep all parties on top table but have the 2 mothers together and the 2 fathers together

Could you not do

Father of groom - Cheif Bridesmaid - Mother of the bride - Groom - Bride - Father of the bride - Best Man - Mother of Groom

Or

Father of groom - Cheif Bridesmaid - Mother of the Groom Groom - Bride Father of the Bride - Mother of the bride - Best Man?

Wow thats a tough one. If you would like them all to be on the top table so no one feels offended the only solution seems to be to put chief bridesmaid and bestman between your parent and his parent on each side. Not traditional but at least u dont have to worry about them getting along.

Eek, not a nice situation.

I have similar, as I was bought up in foster care and don't feel it's fair to have mum at top table without my foster parents too, as they have all done so much for me.

I think what we've decided on is to have a round table with me and OH on it, his parents, my mum and little sister (she's disabled so will need to sit with mum) and then two spare chairs where people can come and mingle with us. As it's just a normal round table, it hasn't got the *importance* of a top table, so I don't feel like I'm being unfair on my foster parents. And I'm OK with this as I don't really want everyone looking at me while I'm shoving hog roast down my neck ?

You could look at Asian weddings for inspiration, as often the bride and groom will have a top table/ thrones for themselves and people come up in *shifts* - I know this won't work for you necessarily, but you could tweak it to fit possibly.

LOL! Ditto! Must have been typing at the same time x

This

We're in the same position, my mum and dad are together but my h2b's parents are both divorced and with new people. For us we just knew a top table just wasnt feasible.

Instead we are thinking of having me and h2b, my mum and dad, two best men and h2bs mum and partner on a standard round table like everyone else.

My maid of honour will be on a table with my friends.

H2bs dad and new wife will be on a table with h2b's three brothers/ partners and his dad's mum.

What's nice is his dad and new wife have both told us they are happy to sit anywhere as they realise the difficulty. Really appreciated that and more than mil would ever say!

So yes, very untraditional and in all honesty cant help but think we are on the boring table!!! But putting the two best men in should lighten it up we hope! my moh got lucky! xxxxx

A round table is a good idea, I hadn't thought of that so may steal that myself lol I also grew up in care so will have two foster mums, a foster dad, MIL, Best Man, MoH me and OH but we don't know who to sit next to who. Also MoH won't know anyone at the top table except me and one of my foster mums and she doesn't really like her lol so maybe a round table would be a better idea for us too.

We had a round top table as i dont like the ones in a line because you dont get to talk to everyone. Plus with a round table you can sit anyone anywere as no one will notice.

Could you ask your parents to host 'top table 2'? Mind you, that means you don't get to sit with them. Could you not just ask the grooms parents to be civil for one day, my parents managed it. Or if they really cant behave like adults, put ushers/best men/bridesmaids between his two parents?

I would have your parents together on your side and his parents together on his side, then bridesmaid and best man either next to you before parents or at the ends. So basically have a bride's half and a groom's half on the top table.

Ours is a bit of a jumble with parents on one side and friends on the other side but that's because OH's dad isn't coming and his mum gets on with my parents.

Sorry I didn't see about the groom's parents! Maybe put the best man between them, or do they need to be further apart than that?!

We have a similar problem with divorced parents on both sides, so whilst we are having a top table, we are having all the girls (one bridesmaid, both mothers and me) on one side and all the boys (both fathers, best man and groom) on the other. Everyone involved seems happy about this and we thought if we can't do 'traditional' we would make it very different!