Venues - is it always love at first sight?

I think the venue is possibly the most important decision to make for your wedding. I think it is important to visit as many as you can and then choose the one that suits your priorities best. Sometimes its not feasible to have the venue of your dreams for one reason or another and you may not both agree on a favourite! What is important is that you pick a venue that you are both happy with and best suits your requirements and budget.

We were really open minded and researched lots of venues in quite a broad area in a range of styles from hotels, castles, barns, city/countryside etc etc.

After contacting about 30 venues for more info/wedding pack we viewed around 12 of those and fell in love with 3.

To help us decide we compared the top 3 venues and drew up a list of pros and cons for each really picking holes in everything and then went for a second viewing of the top 2.

After the second viewings we realised we loved one much more then the other.

The venue we booked was actually the first one one we visited but I'm glad we viewed all the others because this has removed any doubts regarding our choice of venue.

We also did our initial research online then because we knew we wanted to get married away from our home area we booked a couple of nights at our favourite when they happened to be holding a wedding fayre and then we could also visit the other possibilities on the same weekend to draw some comparisons. We weren't disappointed when we got there and my OH didn't even want to visit the others ( was more interested in visiting the classic car museum ! ) but I insisted that we at least checked the others out but nothing else came close to the favourite after speaking with the co ordinator about their packages we booked it on the morning of the wedding fayre before going home , it wasn't our intention to book that weekend but we both felt it was the right place for us.

My OH wasn't really pleased to pointlessly be dragged round 5 other venues but I did take him to the car museum for playing nicely ! ?

I think venues are alot like the dress. When you find the one, all your previous priorities/ideas can just go right out the window!

We only went to see 2 venues. I had looked at loads online and picked two to see on the same day. As soon as I walked into the second venue I knew it was the place for us. It's been nearly a year since we booked and I'm still completely in love with it. For me it was love at first sight! ?

We had 4 venues in mind, did viewings for 3 of them as one we know really well anyway so didn't need to. First one was really disappointing, not at all as it looks on their web site & looked seriously shabby, the second one we fell in love with before we even went in to the building & then loved it more when we went inside, final one we basically knew it was a waste of time as we loved the previous one so much but we went anyway as the viewing was already planned.

For us, we just knew that our venue was perfect for us & couldn't get it out our heads.

When looking for a venue I had a huge list of places that I researched then we worked through which ones we liked best and went to view them, I fell madly in love with one but it was very expensive and in the end I couldn't justify it, my OH fell madly in love with the venue we chose straight away whereas it took me a lot longer as I was comparing it with the one I loved. Our venue ticks all the boxes and I have grown to love it so much, i definitely felt more happy after I'd viewed it for the 2nd time as I totally seen ourselves having a great day there!

fingers crossed you feel better about it when you've seen it again

We looked at everywhere in reasonable travelling distance from church (in a certain direction - OH didn't want to go the other way!)

We had a drink in each other and a potter round before we told them why we were there/asked for more info. Some I hated the toilets, another with the most amazing view didn't have good disabled access for my gran, some demanded we block book 40 rooms for the night of and night before the wedding and we'd have to pay for any shortfall! We made pro/con lists of everything while we were there.

But yes, we pretty much knew ours was ours straight away (when we viewed it). Ironically, OH had refused to step foot in the place for 2 years cos it'd flooded a month before our best mates were due to get married there and they were arsey about giving them their money back. Our friends had to convince him to look!! Our only issue was getting our guest list down to fit. We had to see if it was possible so we knew we could either book or stop dreaming about it!

We fell in love at first sight we a venue that we couldn't afford. We'd have never viewed it if we'd known but there are two venues on the Wirral that won't give prices out on the phone. One is stunning but their basic package was £100 and they'll only let you get married on a package deal. The other was £10,000 room hire before you've bought any food or drink. I wish we could've magicked up £17,000 to have either venue and I hope my venue won't feel second best on the day but I suspect it might.

Thanks for all of your replies. It is really interesting reading about your different experiences. The one we are viewing again ticks boxes e.g. a great outside area, a bit quirky, staff lovely but without seeing the room all dressed up I just don't know if it is special enough. I've looked at photos online but still don't know but yet there is something about it that makes me not want to discount it! We viewed one a few months ago and I really felt it could have been the one but it was just too small and we knew we'd be so worried about everyone being cramped. I just want to book somewhere so badly!

Out of curiousity Funky, what were your top three (apart from the Dorc. of course)

Chiming in a bit late here, but we've just booked ours and I felt it could be the one before we even viewed it. We'd seen 6 before it, and nothing was quite right. The fact that a couple were just completely wrong (they'd done a damned good job making them look good on the websites!), a couple were totally out of our price range and a couple were just OK meant I was coming to the end of my tether. Finally we found our place online and it seemed right - not too pricey, very pretty, and the woman we spoke to was incredibly lovely (which, after dealing with various rude venue people was a bit deal to me). When we visited our feelings were confirmed - it's kind of shabby chic, perfect for our very imperfect, chaotic selves! Go with your instinct and good luck

Thank you and congratulations on finding your venue. I just think we've exhausted most options now and we're just going to have to go with a lovely venue but without that feeling. It sounds silly to say as this isn't a real problem compared to other people's lives but feel so fed up that we've looked so much and can't find it!

Just for a different perspective - I dont love my venue - the churchs i would have wanted wont accept 2nd marriages so ended up with just a church that would accept us, LOVE the reverend, hes amazing, but the church is not the prettiest, though the photographer said shes been there before and it photographs amazingly inside.

as for the reception venue, we've got a non existant budget, every village hall i liked was booked up over a year in advance and every where that was available close to the church was too small. I've ended up with a hall about a 40 minute drive from the church. both have no significant meaning to me making them really random but we're doing the best with what we've got.

I'm not having my dream wedding, and it upsets OH more than he lets on, because he would have loved to have given me that, unfortunately our money was directed towards a custody battle and away from the wedding.

long story short, i do believe there is a "the one" moment, like there is with dresses. but not being able to have it isnt the end of the world either. as long as you can walk away on the arm of the one you love and with a smile on your face, thats all it was about anyways.

1st - The Dorchester

2nd- Coworth Park (in Ascot)

3rd- The Aviator (in Hampshire)

I researched bazillions of venues online, whittled it down to the ones we liked and could afford and viewed 5. 1st was really shabby but expensive, 2nd was lovely but the dancefloor was in a separate room, 3rd just didn't get that spark, 4th was nice and was very well priced but the man showing us around wasn't very professional and kept pointing out all of the negative things about the place, 5th was over our budget but we fell in love with it and could just see ourselves getting married there. After discussing with our parents, who said they were going to help us out anyway we were able to go back and book it :-)

If we hadn't been able to book the last one, we liked the 4th one so it wouldn't have been a hardship booking that but are very lucky and grateful that we got to book our dream venue.

Booked our venue in June 2012 but still haven't actually been to visit it yet. It's abroad and struggling to find time but my Mum knows a few couples who married there and my OH's parents have stayed at the venue and loved it.

It's everything we could think of, let's just hope it lives up to expectations when we actually get out there

I asked how much the marquee was there. £40k.

Naaaaaah.

OMG really? did you do a viewing? We viewed the marquee just to be nosey but personally not a fan of marquees in general!

This is a really interesting thread to read! I always said I'd get married in a registry office & then have the reception at a Sports or Social club & do everything as cheap as possible. My original budget/ideas went totally out of the window once I the other half actually proposed though which shocked me. I'm not materialistic & we don't have loads of money but I just knew which venue I wanted & hoped I could afford it in some way! Even weirder was that I'd never actually been inside the venue, only to the man made beach on it's grounds yet I knew it was the place for me. When we made the appointment with the Events Co-ordinator it was everything I'd hoped for & more! The only research I did was to price up a local hotel so I could compare & contrast what I was being offered there. I didn't look at or consider anywhere else!

If I was having a 3 course sit down meal & providing loads of grog, we wouldn't be getting married there. Choosing different food & only providing some wine on the tables means we can afford it. My wedding is woodsy/romantic/rustic & I wanted something a bit more relaxed so I went for a hot & cold buffet for the Wedding Breakfast & BBQ food for the evening. I'm telling you this because if you look online at prices you may rule places out. Think outside the box food wise & visit anyway because you might be able to choose a package that works for you & is affordable. I even dropped a couple of items off the evening food to get the price per head down. Fortunately, it looks like I can afford the full menu now but again, you can always talk things through with the Wedding/events person & work something out. I hope I'm making sense cuz I'm rambling now lol, sorry about that!

Before we were even engaged, I looked at venues online. However, being from Canada, I picked many that were no where near where he lives lol. We got engaged while I was with him at Christmas, and because we werent sure when I would be back we knew we had to decide on the venue asap.

We went to see probably 6-7. None of them really stood out at first. Some had parts we would like but for one reason or another, just werent what we were looking for, and I was starting to feel discouraged. We finally went to see one venue and loved it. They were unable to show us around so we booked an appointment for 2 days later. The girl was so snobby and you could tell she didn't want to waste her time with us. It turned us off so much we scratched it off out list before we even left the drive way.

I was starting to get scared but we ended up going to one his parents found and we both really liked it, and thought about booking it. Then on a whim we decided to go to one just a stones throw from his parents house. We had already driven by but never went in. While it wasn't "love at first sight" it did have some postives. By the end of the day we had narrowed it down to the 2. The first one we saw (my favorite) and the other one (OH fave). We were having a hard time deciding - we used the pros and cons approach but was getting us no where. I was 95% sure I wanted my venue. Then we took a step back and looked at the whole picture. I realized that even though I loved the breakfast/dance room, the rest of the place was just ok and it would be very crowded if it rained. Plus the other venue was willing to bend over backwards for us- allowing us to have "our" wedding, and do things our way. In the end I realized the carpet I wasnt fond of and a few other things werent a big deal. I think I will be happier where we choose as they are much easier to deal with, there are great places for pictures and I am going to be able to arrange it my way

In a weird way I am glad we had to choose fast, and that we couldnt let the decision drag on

No, after receiving an email with that figure, it went in my 'not bother viewing' pile!

In reference to the OP, we knew as soon as we walked in that our venue was for us. We had to do a bit of number crunching, and had to compromise on day and month so we could afford it, but I couldn't imagine having our reception anywhere else.

We were on a very tight budget, which meant we were starting with a pretty tiny shortlist!

The venue we booked was actually being built when we booked it, so we went and looked around a building site (we're talking hard hats, wellies and scaffolding!). And yet, just from seeing the bare bones and hearing the co-ordinator describing her vision for the place we knew it was for us!

So I suppose it must have been love at first sight. WHen we finally got to see it finished it was even better than we'd imagined! It was like they'd built it solely with our wedding in mind!

We only viewed one venue! I fell in love with it online, and then when we went to view it I burst into tears when we walked into the reception room. So it was definitely love and first sight for us! ) I think everyone has different experiences, but when you know....you'll know! Good luck x

Love this reply. The main object of the day is getting married to the one you love and want to spend the rest of your life with. I too have just booked my wedding venue. I'm getting married in 9 weeks time! I'd best get a move on with sending out the invites lol!