Before I start I'd like to acknowledge that I'm being selfish. I just need help to decide at what point I need to stop!
FIL has told H that his marriage is in trouble, and he and his wife (not H's mother) are considering a trial separation. It seems he's the one moving out. All the information I've had is that he might rent a house, possibly the one directly over the road from us (I haven't determined whether this was FIL or H's idea).
The only family that FIL has that aren't really his wife's family are us, and H's brother, who lives in a shared house.
I don't know whether we should be offering for him to stay with us until they decide whether it's a permanent break up. It seems extreme for him to rent a house, and the one over the road is unfurnished, if it turns out to be temporary. I would also fully expect him to put H up, if it was the other way round.
I don't want to though. The main reasons being that I don't like sharing "my" space, I can be quite untidy when I'm not expecting company, but couldn't live like it with FIL in the house. I think it would therefore be very hard work keeping on top of the house and living with FIL. I wouldn't be suprised if one of the problems in his marriage is the complete lack of balance in the household chores, he's a proper couch potato unless his wife nags him, and as his DIL I couldn't nag.
My main worry is that it would cause problems between me and H, but this is just a concern, I have no evidence of this. H shares this concern.
We'd also have to move everything out of our 3rd bedroom (6x7 foot) to put a bed in for him. We'll have to do this anyway if we have the second child we're planning (although that is something that could be jepoardised if FIL's staying/living with us, I'd imagine).
One other thing putting me off is that FIL said their dogs are a big part of the problem, they're hard work. I've never had a dog, so to me it seems that they should rehome the dogs if they're breaking up their relationship, and all other avenues are exhausted, and they have tried obedience classes. Might be harsh to dog lovers, but surely a marriage is more important. They should never have got the second dog anyway, but that's just my opinion.
So, do you think we should be offering? None of the practical problems are insumountable, but I don't want to end up rowing with H. We're getting on better now than we have done for ages.
Thank you, sorry it's long, but I wanted to include everything that seemed relevant.
