When are people having their speeches?

Before we sit down to eat- 3:15pm as I think it is unfair to keep our Best Man sat sweating through the meal ?

And no, I don't think it is tight if your budget doesn't stretch. Guests should not expect them. However, I have not yet been to a wedding where they didn't have them and we have opted to have them to tie guests over before the meal.

We're having a 1.30 ceremony followed by the wedding breakfast starting at around 3.45pm. Our evening reception starts at 5.30pm, and we'll be having our speeches 6pm - 7pm, cutting of the cake 7.15pm and first dance 7.30pm.

We can't invite everyone to the wedding breakfast mostly due to the cost, so we've shrunk down the time for the afternoon and started the evening early.

Most of our evening guests are coming to the ceremony and those not joining us for the wb will have a couple of hours free time to relax and enjoy themselves in the beauty of the New Forest.

It works for us - it may not work for you or your guests.

Before food for the same reason....get the nerves out the way!

It was my dads one request that the speeches are made before the meal so he can relax. Wedding at 14.30,drinks and welcome at 15.15,speeches at around 16.00.

I think its traditional to have the speeches after the wedding breakfast but we will be having them before as our BM has requested this. The poor bugger is already feeling sick at the thought of it and he has over 6 months to go yet, lol.

We're having ours after the meal, simply because we have a mid-afternoon ceremony (3:30) and want food served around 5:30/6pm so there won't be time for speeches before we eat.

In terms of canapés, I would never have thought it rude at all BUT I did go to one wedding where the ceremony was 11am-ish and food wasn't served 'til mid-afternoon and we were all famished!

We're having ours before we eat...don't want people not being able to enjoy their meal for worrying about their speech!! Don't think we will be eating until about 4 and I was having similar worries about people being starving. I have thought about canapes they are about £9 per head for a few bites and I just can't justify it. Hopefully people won't moan about being too hungry! I've been to weddings where it's worked like this and it seemed fine.

Think we will be doing ours after the meal. Our service is at 3pm so if did speeches before we wouldnt eat till late. Plus I have been to weddings where the speeches were first but I was so hungry I couldnt focus on them

I would like the speeches before the meal, but OH would like a speech in between each course being served!! Apparently thats how they do it where he is from. I am trying to talk him out of it as I feel guests just want to eat without interruptions.

I would have them before and don't feel obliged to have canapes.

We're not sure yet but our timings (registrar depending) are the same as yours but i think itd be courteous to the ones making speeches to let them get it out of the way. If you're worried about people being hungry and you haven't sent out your invites yet you could always pop an order of the day in with your invites so they know when they will be eating and can make sure they have enough to eat to tide them over until the wedding breakfast. Don't feel obliged to include canapés if your budget doesn't allow it and I'm sure no one will care if they are pre warned what time dinner will be served xx

Our speeches are before the meal as this was at the request of the BM.

We are having canapes but mainly because we get married at 12 and don't eat until 3 so thought people wouldn't concentrate on the speeches if starving!

We are having speeches towards the end of the food. As it's a relaxed day and we aren't having canapes either, we decided to let everyone relax and have a drink and some food before we began the evening with speeches and then threw the party into full swing from there!

2pm - Ceremony

2.30pm - Welcome drinks and photos

3.30pm - BBQ and live music

5pm - Speeches and then more live music

7pm - DJ starts

7.30pm - Evening buffet set out

HTH

We are getting married in a Catholic church 1/2 an hr away from the venue so the ceremony is at 1:00, won't be out until 2, then a chat and a few piccies and up to the venue- we won't get there till about 3. We are then having pictures there and speeches before the meal (for the same reason as everyone else with the nerves) so we won't be eating until about 5ish!! We are having canapes tho as we are fortunate enough to have parents contributing most of the wedding so can afford it but originally we were not having canapes, I have been to plenty of weddings without them so don't feel you have to, the guests won't expect them so will probably have eaten well before they come!

Our venue wants us to have them after the meal so that the chefs can get on with preparing dinner for the other hotel guests. It means the best man will have to sweat for a while, but he'll be fine.

Our wedding is 12:30pm also, and sounds like will be roughly same timing as you, and were not having canapes either as we cant stretch to them - but saying that ive not been to a wedding yet that did have them so dont think my guests will be expecting them.

With regards to speeches, my OH thinks he wants to do the speeches after the meal, so suppose its up to individuals on which way they want to do it, HTH

Our wedding is a civil ceremony at 2pm with the meal and reception being held in the same venue as the ceremony. Speeches are before the meal so that it is out of the way and people can enjoy their meal! We are not having canapies and should sit down to eat about 4-4.30.....I think I am going to drop into conversation that people will not be eating till about 4 when I speak to people about the wedding so that they know to have a snack! That is what my friend did as the timings were similar at theirs

xx

From experience it is better to do the speeches first and get them out of the way. So many times I have seen the top table not eating or enjoying their meal because they are so nervous about the speeches.

I think OH would like to forget speeches altogether - not sure I would care if we did really! We are going to thank everyone that has helped us privately/personally, then prob just have a couple of v v short ones from best man and oh before the meal. We are having some canape nibbles around 4ish after the ceremony, then hopefully sit down meal will begin at 6ish. I am wondering if should offer the canapes and welcome drinks before the ceremony though to spread the food out a bit more.

To stop anybody being sick or collapsing with nerves we are doing the speeches and then eating!!

We are having our before the meal as we want the photographer to be there and it means we dont have to feed him! lol x

Were getting married at 1 and i think the wedding breakfast is by 3, were not having any nibbles.

Thinking about it ive never had canapes at a wedding! People can last a few hours with out eating and i know that my h2b will enjoy his meal more getting the speeches out of the way first and thats whats more important in my opinion! On the other hand though our best man is very confident and loves to talk and i think he is planning the longest speech ever so guests may start getting hungry!

We are having an outdoor ceremony and have little pots of bubbles instead of confetti, i was thinking of putting the bubbles and some love hearts in a little organza bag as favours so guests could nibble on those i guess.

Personally, if I was attending a wedding that started at 12:30pm and we weren't given anything to eat until gone 3pm I'd be a little miffed, unless we'd been warned in advance. To get to the ceremony on time we'd probably have to leave at about 11am and I can't eat a lot in the morning so would likely have only had something light, expecting to be fed. And then if I had to sit through speeches as well... let's put it this way, there's no way they would hold my concentration and I'd be willing people to hurry up so we could eat! On the other hand, if you let people know then that's fine, although I can tell you now I would be bringing some cereal bars and munching on them after the ceremony!

We are having our speeches between courses, because we're doing them in the evening with a sit-down meal and I want to allow time for dancing afterwards, so doing speeches during or between courses means we can get through it quicker.

Thanks ladies & gent!

It seems that the vast majority of us are planning on speeches before the meal due to the nerves. And also, the vast majority of us wouldn't expect to receive canapes. I've been to weddings that have had them and those that haven't. I think you're right in that people can cope for a few hours without eating and to be honest, canapes hardly fill you up anyway do they?!! I don't think I've personally ever received an order of the day before hand and I've always just made sure I've had something to eat to tide me over.

I can't see our speeches being terribly long, none of the people giving them are particularly fond of public speaking so won't want to hang around. We'll probably have edible favours of some sort so for those that are simply can't wait an extra 20-30 minutes to eat, they'll probably munch on them! I'd rather they did that than rummage around in their handbags to see what they could find!