When are you having your first dance?

I was thinking of having the cake cut about 7.30pm then getting that given to everyone then the first dance at 8pm when the music starts, i have a feeling though this might change the more opinions i see lol! xx

Our dinner finshed at around 6:45 pm. DJ started at around 7 pm, with people dancing straight away. Our first dance was around 8:30 pm, with the buffet at 9 pm.

6:30 - 7pm on invites, with cake cutting at 7:15pm and first dance at 7:30pm.

I was hoping to try and get it out the way before the evening guests arrive (I hate the thought of everyone just watching us!) but I don't think that's going to be feasible ?

We plan to cut the cake around 7.30pm when all of the evening guests have arrived and 1st dance afterwards.

A few things to bear in mind about the first dance.

1. it's not rare for some of the evening guests to arrive late, but most evening guests usually like to see the first dance.

2. Most weddings over-run, which isn't necessarily a bad thing as it often means everyone's just having fun and not worrying too much about timings.

3. If you do the first dance too early you can then get a lull period. it's best to do the first dance when you feel ready on the night and when you feel your guests are ready to dance. If the guests aren't yet ready to dance then what often happens is that they'll all be around the dance floor for the first dance out of politeness, and will stay there for 1 or 2 songs, but then they'll sit down, go outside etc, and that's when you get the lull period. Whereas when the B&G wait until they feel the guests are ready to dance then there isn't the lull period- the dance floor just stays packed from the moment the first dance finishes throughout the night.

4. If it's a warm day/night and the venue has a nice garden/view, people like to stay outside, and in those cases it's often better to have the first dance later, because otherwise the dancefloor may just be empty after the first dance until the guests come back in.

5. Make sure that you discuss with your photographer so that you know exactly what the situation is regarding the first dance being later than originally planned. Some will be ok to stay until whatever time you do the first dance, some will charge extra, some will pressure you to do it early so that they can go home, but as mentioned above, if you do it too early you then open the possibility of putting a dampener on the first couple of hours, where-as if you just have the DJ playing good background music until you're ready for the first dance there'll be a much better atmosphere than the DJ playing louder music to try to get people dancing.

6. if there are a lot of kids there, it can often be a good idea to have the DJ playing music for the kids before the first dance IF you and your partner are ok with having kiddie music played!

I've DJ'ed at over 2,000 weddings so just giving you some advice based on my experience.

Reading somewhat between the lines above, and to match what we did, our first dance time wasn't fixed. In our preliminary meeting with our DJ (where we all got hammered and relived our Madchester days courtesy of his laptop and a historic Manchester pub garden), we agreed that he would time it for us, when he felt it fitted in, when people were up dancing (we had quite an informal first dance, Hotel Yorba by The White Stripes) and obviously when he'd clocked that we weren't in the loo!

Is your meal and evening entertainment in the same room? If so, you've got to factor in 'turn around time'. During this time all guests are moved to another room (usually) while staff move tables and set up for the evening and the disco sets up. This can vary from 20 minutes to an hour. Your venue will be able to tell you how long it takes them to re-set for the evening....so it's worth asking your DJ how long they take (which can be anything from 15 minutes to 2 hours!!!)

Then you've got to give time for your guests to meander back into the room and get settled in (which can take anything from 10 minutes to half an hour..... so best to get the DJ to play background music during this time.

In NI, nearly all our venues do turn around, hence I've got my set-up time down to 20 mins so as not to delay things.

Hope that helps.

If you're nevous about doing your first dance get it over and done with as soon as possible in the evening - it's the last 'formal' event of the day and then you can relax more.

Are evening guests are invited from 6.30pm (DJ starts at 7pm)and cutting cake about 7pm and 1st dance at 7.30 just so we can relax after If anyone comes late they will have to miss out as we cant do it later as are children are joining us half way through dance