Why doesn't he want me?

I don't think it's a case of he doesn't want you, more like life gets in the way. Tiredness, stress can all have an impact on libido and some suffer more than others.

I do understand how hard it is to feel unwanted though. If my H hasn't bothered with me for a bit I feel like he has gone 'off' me even though it's illogical.

I doubt he doesn't want you?

I think it is a terrible thing that society potrays men as having higher sex drives than women and always up for it. My OH has felt confident enough to tell me that he doesn't always want sex but it bloomin hurt at first because I took it as rejection of me rather than the fact that sex wasn't that importnat to him.

Also tiredness, stress, having a child can really affect your sex drive be your man or woman.

He might even just think you need your space as opposed to pressurising you into sex.

There are sooo many reasons of which him not wanting you would eb the last?

I know for me that whenever we haven't had sex for a while, it gets so much harder to actually get back to doing it again, if that makes sense. H has a much higher sex drive than me and would have it every day if he could, but whenver we have gone for a long period without it, he must have got used to it and then isn't interested anymore. It's like we get stuck in a rut, and the longer it goes on the harder it is to get back on track.

? Bookgirl. I'm sorry I missed this earlier. My H is similar at times. Doesn't help he is on ADs which suppress his sex drive. I think he could quite happily go without the majority of time unless I instigate it.

It does hurt though when you are rejected. I'm really sorry. x

I know at times I don't want it at all though especially when I'm tired or have a lot on my mind. It doesn't mean I don't fancy Mr P though.

Big ? Relationships can be tough. x

That's why one of my MILK date night posts was 'when was the last time you had sex' because this is the longest it's been for us...not DTD since early March. I was always batting H off before but he seems to have given up which has me worried!

Maybe he was just genuinely tired. It's so hard to get sex drives in sync with a child.

I think you may need to be a bit more obvious and pounce on him (shame I can;t take my own advice!)

?

? I agree with the others. It's probably more likely to be a case of everything just getting in the way. I know when I get home from work, have cooked and washed up all I want to do is go to bed! And that's without having any children to look after! Maybe the two of you just need some time on your own to relax together and then hopefully things will fall into place xx

I'm sorry that things are tough. This has to be one of the hardest things to sort out as it's one of the hardest things to talk about. Have you had a discussion with him about it, when you aren't already in bed? It may be that you need to try and make a night every so often that's just the two of you when you can be together and not worry about anything else. Does he know you feel this way? Perhaps you can start by just making time to kiss and make out more and build up slowly from there. I wouldn't take it personally, it sounds like there's an awful lot going on that makes you both tired. Best of luck finding a solution x

Some good comments here. One thing that hasn't been asked is do you normally sleep less generally than H? My H sleeps less than I do - which means by the time we "go to bed" he's still awake and up for it whereas I've been struggling to keep my eyes open and just want to sleep!

I don't have children so don't have that to worry about re bedtimes but is there any way you could go to bed earlier so that he's not so tired when you do get there?