Worried about how to pay for our wedding!

We're very lucky that my parents are paying for half of the wedding and his parents are paying for our honeymoon, but if we didn't have their help we'd most likely have a cheap registry office wedding followed by a meal as I just don't think it's worth getting into debt for. It's the being married part that counts more than anything so I'm sure you can figure out a way to do something lovely on a budget.

Getting into debt is not the only way to do it. A wedding doesn't have to cost a lot. Get married in a register office, job done. You'll still be just as married, as if you had a big wedding.

You don't have to get into debt to get married. If you can't afford it, save? If you don't want to get into debt/save, then book a register office.

It's not worth getting yourself into debt. We've been putting a bit by every month for our wedding, we're keeping it small to keep costs down, but still having everything we want at the same time. 5k for a wedding is a lot, you can easily have a lovely wedding for much less than that.

Hi there!

We are paying 100% for our own wedding but we don't have kids and we are okay financially so we are okay to do this.

However 3 of my friends did it on a tight budget and this is what they did - 1 of them got married at the registry office and gthen took a small group of family and friends to a local 2 for 1 pub meal and people bought their own drinks, the average main course was about £11 so as it was 2 for 1 it worked out at £5.50 per main meal at it was lovely!

Another friend went to Gretna Green, just her and her fella and came back and had a big BBQ at home, both her and her hubby have their own businesses and are very well off but she didn't want the fuss and the drama. My other friend also had a BBQ at home in their garden but got married in the local church so had a church wedding beforehand.

It depends what kind of wedding you want and also what is most important to you. Regardless of your budget you are marrying the man that you love and that is what is most important.

When is your wedding? Have you booked your wedding venue? If you haven't then go for a midweek wedding and between the months of March-Oct my venue offers 20% discount on venue hire during these months.

Wedding photographer: We booked with an amature photographer and we're only paying £100. Ask a family or friend to take photo's, disposable cameras on tables or ask around at your local college and see if any student photographers would be interested.

Make your own flowers, decorations, centrepieces. If theres anyone in your family who is good at baking maybe they could make your cake.

Instead of a new dress maybe consider a sample dress or second hand.Theres so many ways to save money if you're willing to.

We paid for ourselves, but we were in a position to be able to do so.

As the others have said, £5k is a healthy budget and you should be able to have a lovely day for that. However, you could have an equally lovely day for far less, and not accrue as much debt (which is always a good thing). I'm concerned that if you don't have any spare money to save, how will you meet the repayments?

Do you have a rough plan of where the money is going, and we could make suggestions from that? A register office will be your cheapest option. A late ceremony would mean people only need feeding once. There are some lovely village halls around, which you can decorate as cheaply or as extravagantly as you like.

We have a 5k budget and have only managed it as OH has been putting a lot of his wage away every month! We aren't living together at the moment -I'm living with parents and OH is renting a little bedsit so he has been able to save more. By the time we are married, we will have been engaged for two years. We would've loved to have done it this year but would never have saved enough to have the wedding we wanted.

So, perhaps you could consider pushing the wedding back and saving for longer? Or, as others have said, try and book a venue mid-week for cheaper packages and definitely do lots yourself - centrepieces, decorations, cake, etc. We could've probably had our wedding for less but I wanted to have a few treats. You just have to work out what it is you want first. You definitely aren't alone in paying for it all yourselves, neither of our families are contributing big amounts.

My budget is even less than yours - £2000. I am making everything I can do myself and am buying what I can't make on preloved sites on facebook etc... I have asked friends to help me out instead of giving us not needed gifts and we aren't having a wedding breakfast, just a buffet. My friend is making my bouquets for me, another friend is making my guest book, my photographer is my son's girlfriend who is a photography student and our cake is only costing £150. Someone I know has hired their videographer by calling their local college and asking for a student to help out. she is paying £80 even though the student said she'd do it for free, in order to cover costs of dvd, transport etc... There are ways to keep costs down and we are getting no financial help from family as our wedding is second time around for both of us and we felt it would be unfair. Good luck!! Plan wisely x

Not being rude but why do you live with your parents still?

I love my family but I think i would kill them if I still had to live there

im budgeting £5000 - £6000 not including honeymoon

I could do it way, way cheaper (but still nice) if I wasnt so damn picky

a lot of my family get married on under £1000, some ways they have done it:

rented dress

high street dress

free learner photographer from the local college (always a risk though)

bough a car of ebay cheap then sold it afterwards (great idea imho but the did own their own car dealership so know about selling cars)

home made buffet (personally I hate them)

free room hire at the local workers club (I personally would never do that though, sticky floors and damp wall are not wedding-y)

cake from ASDA/WALMART/TESCO/M&S etc... (great for a buget and you can decorate yourself quite easily)

people pay for their own drinks (open bars are a waste in my opinion)

local registry office (some are very nice but I wouldn't use my horrible local one)

hand made accessories and or gifts (can be sweet)

mix CD playing or cheap local pub DJ (but bare in mind you may end up with aga do and the macarena lol)

some other cheaper options are:

cupcake cakes

charity shops/ebay (you can get bargains)

borrowing a friends car

making own flowers

....goes on to ask rude question

Hi all thanks for all the reply's

We have booked the church already as that's where OH really wanted to get married.

We have booked a village hall so can do own food and drink which i think is the bulk of wedding cost, but its things like transport that i cant get away from spending on.

I have managed to find a link for 20 FREE personalised save the date cards think this wedding might turn me into the new Martin Lewis looking for bargains

Stupidly rude question.

Could you get a taxi, or ask a friend with a nice car and just put some ribbons on it?

The Hitched brides have loads of good money saving ideas for all sorts of things. :-)

Because sometimes things in life dont happen how you plan them ....

My mother moved in with me when she divorced my step dad and lost her home and business. We share all the bills and she looks after my son when i go out (win/win!)

She is still single so im hoping she meets someone by the time me and my son leave the home after the wedding

? and this is a relevant question because?

To the OP as the other have said 5k is a very doable bugdet and I am sure you can easily have what you want for this but I disagree with getting into debt for it, have you worked out that you can comfortbaly pay this loan back each month. There are so many ways that you can cut costs, making things you're own, a preloved dress, registry office, etc I would have another rethink at the cost of debt looming over you after you're married.

I saved a fortune by doing this:

had my best mate drive me to the venue in her car - I paid £3.00 for some ribbons

had the best man's 2 kids take the photos - they took 1000's of them, and from those 1000 we had a few hundred that a professional could not have done better

the cake was a giftI got my dress from House of Frazer (£140)

I had one bridesmaid - my daughter - and her dress was a gift from the best man's wife

My sister did my hair

I sought out a proper cheap venue (hotels are competing wildly against each other now for the cheapest "package" wedding)

My wedding didn't come to anywhere near £5K yet I had had all the components in it that my friend had in hers - she had a £40K wedding. (Except the caviar and free-flowing champagne).

Awww, I hope your mam finds someone who makes her happy

to the other person im just curious as its slightly unusual to live with parent when you have such an old child of your own

I used to live on and off with my mam as a carer but after having my son I dont think I could of remained sane if we all lived together lol

OP: I have never, ever, been to a wedding where I heard anyone say 'the wedding would have been lovely except the transport was rubbish'. Honestly, no-one will notice, esp if you have a few photos done around the churchyard while everyone else goes on the the reception..and then you've saved yourself hundreds of pounds. Order a black cab and stick a ribbon on it, or borrow a two seater from a friend and let your new hubby zoom you to the reception.

You have a whole year to pick up things at a good price, but do beware 'the bargain you will never use' as it does seem to be a common comment on here that peopel buy someting inexensively and then later on change their mind so it goes to waste.

Our budget is more than yours, but we're paying for exactly £5,000 of the wedding ourselves. Have you looked into an interest free credit card? Ours is the Tesco Clubcard one, it's 0% interest on purchases for 16 months, so we've worked out that it means we need to save £160 each a month (that's rounded up, think the exact figure was £157 or something). If you're not saving for anything else that's very easy to do, as you work part time and your partner full time, maybe he could save more e.g. £220 and you save £100 a month? We're managing to do this (although we both work full time) as well as save £130 per month each for our house deposit and £100 a month each for our honeymoon! It's very doable.

Yep.

And I (personally) LOVE a good buffet.

Oh im very sorry I forgot i must like everything you do ffs ? talk about immature

and its not a rude question at all, its called convocation - Id rather ask questions and talk to people then make ignorant assumptions behind their backs

A convocation (Latin, "calling together", translating the Greek ecclesia) is a group of people formally assembled for a special purpose.

I suspect it's the way you say 'I dont mean to be rude...' you then ask a personal question in what will then be read as a rude way as you have just stated you are about to be rude even if you dont mean it.

I expect I am immature because I am so young.

But actually, making a reasonable suggestion and then saying you personally hate it, is not so helpful as it might cause some doubt as to the seriousness or viability of the suggestion. It wasn't something that needed qualifying with an opinion.

Apologies if you were unable to feel the irony in my response.

Now now Ladies

Im lucky in a way ... i get dinner made most nights, all my ironing done, house cleaned and live in babysitter who pays half the rent and bills

My OH has a lot to live up to bless him

I love comments that start 'I'm not being rude'

what it means is 'I'm going to ask something rude'

dont dress it up people, just go all out and say what you feel

OP, your thread duplicated and I replied on the other one, only just found this one but here was my input:

Sorry to hear about your dad

Getting into debt is probably a bad idea and best to avoid it if possible. You probably don't want to start married life in debt. Our rule is if we haven't got the money for it then we can't have it.

There are plenty of people who get marred for very little money, it just depends on what is important to you. We have had to prioritise things and get rid of others to get by. Photography was very high on our important list for example, so much of our budget went there. We are also getting married mid week which cuts the cost massively. I got my dress fairly cheap as it was from a shop selling ex cat walk dresses (mine is from a 2012 collection). It can be done you just have to shop around and find the best deals

Hope you can find a way.

Not sure why its duplicated Ive never wrote on a forum before .. am i meant to click on quick reply .. or reply?

Reply is better to quote but if not then you can use quick reply. Don't worry about the duplicate it just happens sometimes.

How about contacting car clubs? My brother in law has a classic car and he told me many people he knows with classics would love to use their motor as a favour for a wedding car just to show it off! Many said they'd do if for a tank of fuel which is around £70 (less if you get a smaller car!). We have managed to find one for the bridesmaids for just £60 :-) My transport is a classic American HGV (yes, an HGV!) which belongs to my cousin so we're only paying for fuel.

I'm not bothering with save the date cards, we're sending out our invites just after Christmas (we're getting wed 1st March). We are probably going to use vistaprint.co.uk for our invites. We have worked out it would cost less than £100 for 60 wedding invites, 150 evening do invites plus cards printed with gift info/venue directions and 60 voucher cards for a free drink (we are doing this instead of favours) plus all the envelopes we need. Another option would be to print invites yourself, there are some websites that allow you to download invite templates for free.

We are buying our flowers from the supermarkets a couple of days before and making our own displays and my bouquet (my wedding is very laid back boho vibe so it won't matter if the flowers don't match)

My sister is making the cake, she is also doing my hair, make up and nails.

My dress was last season so I got a £500 dress for just over £150 ? H2Bs suit is from Matalan - three piece suit for less than £70. Best man and ushers are providing their own suits, as is my dad. Bridesmaids paying for their dresses (which were just £35 each from ebay)

Most of the venue decorations are made by myself, the rest bought second hand, ebay, poundland etc

I just wanted to show you it doesn't have to be expensive. You need to get beyond the wedding snobbery and what is expected of you. Just think about what you and your H2B REALLY want and what you'd both REALLY enjoy and do it as cheap as possible. The best wedding I have ever been to cost just £2,500 but you would never have guessed it, it was amazing!

JJKCB, if you start a question with "I'm not being rude but....", it implies that you know full well that it is rude. The question was also entirely irrelevant to the OP's query.

OP - you absolutely do not need to get into debt to get married. We are in the same position as you, no savings, no family help, kids etc but we will not be borrowing a single penny to fund this wedding. Granted it means alot of work for me, as I am making the cake, growing the flowers, making the invites, dressing the venue and doing my own hair and make up. I will be getting about by either taxi or friends if I can convince someone and married in the registry office in an ebay dress.We will have our own music on an ipod and a member of the family will be given a camera, so no professional photos Our venue is free and we are managing the whole thing on a budget of £1k - £2k. I think your budget is too big for someone who doesn't have any money, so maybe you need to look at the ways in which you can cut costs somewhat. I know some people might look at my wedding plans and pity my cheapo options but in all honesty I would prefer to do everything on the cheap than to accumulate several years worth of debt and if you are sensible and realistic it is entirely do-able

Totally agree with this.