Would you change your date for Wills and Kate?

No Lyns, he doesn't. He has a couple of rooms booked, and the 'garden' area.

LOL @ tinks ...

AJ - have you asked the hotel about a naughty step? Suspect they' could get one installed for you by the same maintanance guy who'll come to remove the fag boxes off the wall...

This is classic Hitched ... and he's not even a troll!

Ok AJ does have very extreme views but ladies if you read this thread from the beginning to end like I just have, I think the majority of you are being really out of order to him,

I am not saying everyone should be all fluffy and everyone is allowed to have their views but if you read from the begin of the thread it seems to have changed from would you change you date which I would not to lets see you can slag off AJ the most!!!!?

I dont take him seriously now, i think he is doing it to cause a bit of excitement in his life, probably makes his days go quicker by seeing people get revved up by his silly little man opinions!!

King George - do you read all of his replies? He is like this on every bloody subject! It grates on ones nerves after a while.

No maybe I should have a quick look, just read this one

... or you could have worded it that I don't back down under pressure from others for being in the minority, meaning that I do at least hold true to my views even if they aren't necessarily the most popular. I say what I mean, and I mean what I say.

I'm going to try to reply to this without getting too embroiled in the drama because I don't think this fire needs fuelling any further.

I wouldn't change my date if the royal wedding takes place on the same day. It's very unlikely to as our wedding is on a Sunday, but it makes very little difference to me either way. If our dates are the same, it would be kind of cool. I have to admit that I wouldn't be overly happy if loads of my guests went missing to go and watch it on tv, but banning everyone from talking about it is completely out of order. I would be hugely annoyed if I was invited to a wedding and was asked to refrain from discussing particular current affairs topics.

On the 22nd May 2011, the most imporant thing without a doubt for me will be our wedding, and Mr Spoon will feel the same. I would imagine that my parents and his mum will agree. But I am not so self-deluded to believe for even a minute that it will be the most important thing happening in the lives of our guests. Yes I am sure that they will be pleased to be there, and that they will be happy to be a part of our day - but they will also be wondering about family issues, problems at work, sporting events, world news... the list is endless.

I don't subscribe at all to the "your day, your rules" philosophy. Yes I will fight all the way to make sure that the general look and feel of teh day reflects us and what we want. But just because I am getting married, it doesn't give me the right to stop treating others as individuals in their own right. I will not force my BMs to wear dresses they don't like, or to have their hair or makeup the way that I want them to; I will not tell people what does and does not constitute an acceptable topic of conversation; and I will not be monitoring where people choose to smoke. I have no right to do any of these things.

My friends and family are all reasonable, considerate people - that's why I want them at the wedding. I trust them implicitly and therefore know that none of them would do anything to purposely spoil our day. The few that smoke would always make sure that they are away from those who don't. And not one single person would sit in the ceremony whispering about how we don't look as good as William and Kate.

Doesnt really read like a polite request to be considerate when deciding where to smoke!

When I saw the news, my reaction was more that couples would be booking the same date, just to say they had the same date as Royalty.

good for you hun. hope you have a happy life in your own little bubble world of opinionated self obsession. Go swim in it love.

I'm out.

Here here!

I was feeling sorry for you and trying to stick up for you maybe I can see why people have responded in a way that they have!!!

We're getting marrie din central london, in Inner Temple, which is about 15 minutes walk from St Pauls. If they choose the same day as us, i *might* consider changing the date, as many of our guests are out-of-town and need hotels (which will be expensive) and getting around town would be difficult for people (especially as many of our guests are french, and won't be able to handle public transport so well if it's very very busy!)

but we had a nightmare co-ordinating our date for the church and venue, and have already applied for our special liscence so I might well just leave things alone and try and hope for the best!

Yes I take my first post back lol x

Well i dont mind if they choose to share our day with us ? in fact i think it will be quite cool and would def raise a glass to them and mention it in the speeches...I'll be first in the queue for any tv doc's or magazine interviews for people getting married on the same day!

If you do share the date, you might find you get a gift of some sort.

My sister was born on the same day as Prince Harry. Each baby born was given a Christening gown by Boots. Some corporation might do an equivalent.

Random fact of the day; your sister is 15 days older than me!

MY OH MY OH MY OH MY!!!

Just catching up on this fabulous discussion!

I would like to go back to the OP and say that i would be devastated if they chose the same date as mine as that would mean me having to decline Kate Bridesmaid request

Well, that took me a fair old while to read through that little lot!

If I was getting married next year, I wouldn't change the date of my wedding. I'd probably record Will's & Kate's wedding to watch later though! I think if I was getting married in the city, I would probably be concerned about the potential travel chaos.

AJ, I don't see how you would be able to ban any Royal wedding talk. IMO, it's OTT and not possible in any event - how would you enforce it?

I can understand your view on smoking at the wedding to a certain point. I'm asthmatic and it would really bother me if people were smoking close to me, even outside. I find it difficult to breathe when I'm in close proximity to smokers, and it also makes me feel unwell (bit queasy). I don't think it's practical however to limit the amount of ashtrays, as you risk used cigarettes being disposed of on the ground.

Given that there may be only a couple of smokers there in all of our guests, I don't think limiting the amount of cigarette boxes within the (relatively small) outdoor area that we are using is going to cause any real 'ground debris'.

AJ if there are only a few smokers attending your wedding why are you having the hotel remove all the ashtrays? My sister works in a hotel and if anyone demanded that they remove the ashtrays from the PUBLIC area outside they would be told to take a flying f**k to themselves.

Seeing as you've only got a small amount of smokers why go to the extreme of removing the boxes, it's not like you're going to constently have people outside smoking, it'll be those two people popping out every now and then.

What would you prefer, them nipping out the door for 2 minutes or dissapearing down the end of garden for 10, i know what i would!!

I've already explained this one. There's a garden at the back of the hotel attached to the function room which we are using, and the hotel has a private bar in a side room off of the function room so we can be entirely self contained.

The garden will not be open to other hotel guests during the time we are using it. The hotel has its main bar for guests, and another room it can use as a dining room when all of the function rooms (the main room can be divided into 2 but we need it all) is in use.

There is a smoking area at the front of the hotel that the other people using the hotel will be able to use.

We won't be getting in the way of other people staying at the hotel, and vice versa. In fact, the hotel has a policy that music must be turned down by 11pm and off by midnight anyway (with non residents vacated by 00:30) , so as to not inconvenience others staying at the hotel - not that a live ceilidh band is going to be anywhere near as loud as a several kilowatt sound system anyway...

No doubt he will be having a ban on the use of TVs anywhere in the hotel and also banning anyone from bringing their mobile to the wedding on the off chance they access something he doesnt want them to.

Well I'm glad we aren't using that hotel because they'd have lost a booking for that attitude.

AJ i dont really think you are in a position to comment on the attitude of others.

They only slot onto a small bracket on the wall anyway so it's not exactly a difficult task to remove them - but we did mention it in our booking appointment with them and they didn't protest about it. Whether it gets done on the day or not remains to be seen but they will be reminded of it in the "final instruction pack" that will be sent to the hotel, band, and given to all ushers on the day so that everyone knows what needs to be done, where it needs to be done, and when it needs doing.

What else would you call it then, for the information that you (or your wedding planner) would give to the hotel so they have your table/seating plan, let them know that the band will be arriving at around 6pm and need to be shown to so they can set up in a certain area against the back wall, at 7.30pm you'll need a couple of staff members to be handy to take down the dividing wall between the two halfs of the room etc?

I can't help the way I am, or how people take what I say. But do you not agree that a 'days plan' is important? Of course, if the band starts at 7.32pm instead of 7.30pm it's not the end of the world, but when the chef wonders why you're still having speeches at 3.45pm when he thought the food was meant to be out on the table at 3.30pm (not 4pm as he'd realise if he had seen the plan) surely that's a bit more of an issue?

We aren't expecting our day to be like a military operation - we just want it to run how we have planned it, and I'd have thought that such a document was an essential part of everyone's "big day planning"?

That's what I thought.

Our venue already know our rough timings as the wedding co-ordinator emailed them to us. We'll give them the seating plan the day before and will be having meetings with them to discuss everything else. My future SIL is going to check over everything on the day (she has no role in the ceremony so I've asked her to do this so she's included) and will need some information but she's really the only one.

I can't ignore this, having worked at a hotel and been involved with wedding coordination and on the day supervision at said venue.

they are a professional venue/hotel AJ, they don't need you telling them they need staff to take down a dividing wall at a certain time by way of a PACK that you hand over like they need babysitting to do their job. You discuss set up with them, they take notes and thats that. Thats why you're paying them - to worry about the hows and whats and whens.

They will have other things to do other than look after you as they are a public venue with the public to look after as well as you. Staff will be allocated their jobs at the start of their shift including what they need to do for you and at what time without you handing over a patronising 'pack' of timetables and instructions. Venues don't tend to work like that. They will accept it gracefully from you I am sure, but in the back office, they will be rolling their eyes. Trust me.

You think yours is the only event they've ever staged? Get over yourself love.

I agree with BeckBoo. Yes venues need timings, of course they do, but do they really need to be told when to make staff available to remove partitions, etc? I would imagine that your venue have dealt with one or two weddings before and so know perfectly well that "7.30pm - band starts" means that they need to set up the room accordingly by then. Surely they know what they're doing?