Now the dad/holiday/sister saga is sort of resolved, it's the turn of his alcoholic and mentally unbalanced mum to kick off.
To put it in context she was abusive to OH when he was a child, she was very religious but sort of used that as an excuse to beat him and abuse him, now he has very limited contact with her (Xmas visit usually). I have met her twice, once she was lovely, the second time she scared me to death with her odd accusations. Still OH tries his best as he feels like he should be a 'good son' and I guess wants to do the right thing by her. So he ummd and ahhed about her coming to our wedding from the start, he is frightened she would get drunk and ruin it, but also of course he wants to include his mum on the day. She didn't come to our engagement party as his sisters didn't bother to arrange a lift for her, and she is pretty much a recluse, only going out to collect her benefits and then spend it on vodka.
When we sent her STD card we thought she had reverted back to her maiden name, say Smith for e.g. as she was always banging on about how horrible her married name was e.g. Jones. Constantly slagging off the Jones side of the family and her ex husband, yet ringing her ex's mum (OH's frail old granny) to try and stay involved with the Jones family. But OH was under the impression she had gone back to her maiden name after the divorce. So we addressed her STD to [first name] Smith instead of [first name] Jones. That caused her to kick off. So when I did the invites I was sure to write Mrs [first name] Jones.
She received her invite today. Instead of ringing OH to thank him and accept, she leaves an awful voicemail (he has her blocked so she instantly goes to VM, as she has a habit of calling him up at all hours when she is drunk and saying abusive things) saying 'you are a disgusting child. You have invited me. Why have you invited me? I am not a 'guest' I gave birth to you and offered you to God.' He called her back and she ranted on at him and basically has refused to come to the wedding as my OH is total scum and has disgraced her, in her words.
This has probably been one of the worst weeks ever for OH family-related, and I just don't know what I can say to help him, just awful for him to hear this stuff at what is supposed to be a happy time. Oh yes and to top it off one of his sisters then FINALLY calls him demanding to know why their mum is ringing her crying, not mentioning their secret holiday plans though.
Edit - it is normal to actually give an actual invite to people such as parents isn't it? We gave my mum an invite (whilst she was writing half of them for me!) and wrote her name not 'mum', and the same for his dad and gran. It is just his mum being bonkers isn't it, and not some horrible mistake we've made?
