Are any brides TTC before the wedding?

I think it's definitely worth having some time to enjoy the new house. We've been in ours for 7 months now and there's always a bit of DIY to do here and there! Thanks for posting your story and good luck to you x

I can see why you're a bit worried about delaying TTC as you've got few plans in place. I hope you can get sorted soon. Would you have a chat with your husband after your honeymoon and see if he wants to try? It would be a shame to keep delaying it when you have a set idea of when you would like to have a child. Good luck! X

That's a lovely plan! You have a couple of years to judt enjoy yourselves even more! I think I might do the same and stop taking the pill after the wedding and let my body return to normal before trying. I would also like my kids close together, we'll see! Good luck to you guys x

We already have one child together who was a little surprise. I'm actually a little broody so would love to try for another child but selfishly wouldn't like to be showing at our wedding. Hopefully we will be trying once we are married, I'm thinking once I finish this pack of pills I could just give up, that will be around 3 months before the wedding "/

We have been trying for 2 years, since before we even thought about marriage! Unfortunately we just found out we have fertility problems and will need ivf. I'm 34 now and panicking like mad. I would say do it, and do it now as you really don't know when or even if it will happen for you! Weddings can be rearranged if necessary, and sod what people think. Good luck xx

Interesting to read everyones ideas on this. Im 25 & h2b 27. H2b wanted to start trying a month or 2 before the wedding. However being a midwife & having my midwife head on, i really want to wait until after the wedding to start trying. Morning sickness can be so extreme for some women, not just happenibg in the morning but sometimes all day. Many need admission to hospital in severe cases. Knowing me, i'll be one of those women! Also one in five pregnancies end in miscarriage, scarily high isn't it! For me i do not want to risk going through either of those situations around the time of the wedding, so i think i will come off my pill on our honeymoon. Sorry, i hope i haven't put a downer on this topic lol x

MrsB88, no, i dont think its a downer, its just the unfortunate realistics of it isnt it. Both the morning sickness and miscarriage risk is something in the back of my mind, and I know it would be in H2Bs too, with us trying a few months before, but I think with us both knowing its potentially something that could happen we can just support each other through it if it does, if you know what I mean.

Yea i know what you mean. I totally agree & think they key thing is supporting each other. Not that me & h2b wouldn't support each other! Lol. It's just for each couple/person to decide when the right time for them is.x

Exactly this ?

Thanks for sharing your story! I'll definitely try not to leave it too late! Good luck to you. I hope the fertility treatment works soon!

No, you're just expressing your opinion! I can see how it would be stressful to enjoy your wedding when you're unwell. Good luck to you x

30 too old?! Best not say that to my 47 year old sister who has just had her second!

We already have a 2 year old (we had her at 21/20 yrs old - partially planned!) and we're discussing trying for our second and last after the wedding in 911 days! Haha.

Really? That's awesome
Next time my mother starts yelling at me that I'm leaving it too late I'll use that as a comeback!

Not the same as actually having the baby but OH is going to be first time Daddy at 46. Age is just a number.

Unfortunately not for all of us CRL. I was diagnosed as being in peri-menopause at the age of 40 - and had probably been for a year before that. So my child bearing days are officially over. I might still feel 30 in my head but my body is saying different. Eating healthily and looking after myself have made zero difference to my biological clock.

There are some people who are very lucky and conceive later but don't assume that will be you if you definitely want to have kids.

Yep, as we discussed in the PMT thread over in OT, me too. There's no denying that it does get more difficult to conceive as you get older and it comes with more potential complications. That's not to say that many women can't successfully conceive and give birth to healthy kids well into their 40s, and lots do, like Mini's sister. But we are all working with a limited number of eggs here!

Sorry I meant age is just a number in terms of I don't think anyone should be told they are 'too old' to have a baby, especially at 30! Obviously different medical situations mean different things.

Hi all

I thought I would share an update on my situation for any brides to be who are thinking about this...

I was struggling with whether to book the wedding while TTC as I didn't ideally want to be pregnant/sick - but was also worried about waiting and it not happening and still having not booked the wedding! We decided to book the wedding for next year and keep trying.

I have now had some investigations and recently been told that we are unlikely to conceive naturally and will be referred for IVF. So I am SO glad we booked the wedding and are not just waiting around for something to happen! I am nearly 30 so we still just about have time on our side. For the overwhelming majority of people there will be issue conceiving when you want to,but it is worth bearing in mind that it may not be that straight forward.

Just though I'd share as this was such a difficult dilemma for us and it is so nice to know we made the right decision (despite this being a horrible thing for us to come to terms with currently). All the best to all you TTCing brides to be out there! (and those deciding to wait!)

I'm sorry to hear you've had this news, but so glad you had already booked the wedding.

All the best and lots of good thoughts for the IVF. you must be relieved that this came out sooner rather than later as it gives you much better chances.

Sorry to hear your news. You can focus on your wedding now and get planning. Hopefully you will receive IVF treatment soon. My friend was in the same situation as you and thanks to IVF she's due to give birth in a couple of weeks' time so keep your chin up . When's your wedding? x

I hope this doesn't sound awful but it's actually nice/reassuring to see that there are lots of other women/couples in similar situations who are TTC. After just over two years of going through the fertility process knowing all along that I'd need IVF, we got put on the list in Feb this year and were told it was a year which was perfect for us. Unfortunately in this situation a shorter waiting list was bad news as we got called for an apt in December and had to turn it down due to wedding and honeymoon! So back on the end of the list now! But hopefully the timing will work out to give us a few months after honeymoon to settle ourselves. Hope everyone's plans work out the way they want them to x

Thanks all for your nice words

Ah Eden I didn't know you got put back at the bottom of the list if you turned down an appointment?! Our wedding is April - I think the waiting lists here are around 4-5 months (not long as we only get one cycle). And it doesn't sound at all awful, TTC is a lonely journey sometimes and it always helps to know that there are others in similar positions (who are managing!). All the best for your wedding this weekend!!! And for your future treatments, hope it's not too long before you have a little one. But it is a good attitude to have to think that a few months to yourself will be nice - it will!

I think going back to the bottom of the waiting list if you turn down an appointment is standard procedure in the NHS. Many years ago, I almost had to give up my £100 Madonna ticket when I was finally given a date for surgery on my knee and didn't dare turn it down!

So you went ahead with the surgery and still went to Madonna? Rock on!

On the topic, my pill is due to run out in March, the wedding is in July. I am aiming to take that time to get my body back to 'normal', even if that means the return of mood swings and periods. Boo.

At that point I will start using other contraception and take folic acid, just in case! Both my fiance and I are really eager to start, though I feel less panicky these days about 'leaving it too late'. If I'd had children in my twenties it would have been with the wrong man. Better to wait for the right one and then see what happens. If we are not meant to have children, I will be upset, but I will have a lovely husband to spend the rest of my days with. And more disposable income!

I will be 33 when we get married. My mum was 33 when she had me and that was back in the day. I have seen friends have babies into their 40s, and friends with fertility problems in their early twenties.

When the time comes, I can totally see myself getting obsessed with the TTC forum as much as I am obsessed with this!

You can actually put it off for a month but that didn't work for us as we decided to do an epic month long honeymoon so wouldn't have been back! I felt guilty that I was putting the honeymoon first but I think in terms of my preparedness and emotional well being it would probably be best to do the honeymoon! Then I'll get in the right mind frame and I'm going to do all the wacky alternative therapy things I can get my hands on lol! Only one cycle here in NI too so even if it's placebo effect want to feel that I'm doing everything I can

Roguesnowflake - that is a lovely attitude - and it is a nice place to talk about this stuff as when it comes down to it not everyone has a partner who they want to marry so we are heads up in that respect whatever happens after the wedding.

Eden, also lovely attitude, a month long honeymoon sounds like a fantastic idea! Where are you going?

I got married in June and planned to start trying straight away then we out it off. Plan was to wait till new year and chuck pill out! I have two packs left!!!! However my step sister has just throw a massive spanner into the works she gets married in October 2015 in Jamaica and I would love to go! But concerned if I get pregnant straight away I'd be too far gone to travel... Tickets are being booked next week and im still trying to decide what to do! My husband is up for anything so gas left it to me to decide!

I'm 28... And always said I'd have my first before I turn 30 which doesn't give me much time... Doesn't help that I'm a midwife and everyday my colleagues keep telling me not to leave it too long and reinforce I should have one before hitting that 30mark!

Could you just hold off for another few months to make sure you'll be able to fly?

I'm over 30 and if i'm honest your post has stressed me out a bit. Maybe I need to get a move on. Haha!

I'm surprised at your colleagues. It's a lot of pressure to put on someone over something really quite personal (although I appreciate it's part of your job). I read somewhere that the average age of first time mother's has hit 30 now so it's pretty clear that lots of women are having children later.

I know so many people who struggled to conceive because they put pressure on themselves in respect of maximum age at which to have their first. As soon as they relax a bit and realise that these things can't always be planned perfectly they became pregnant.

My friend's mum had her at 42. They had been trying since she was in her early twenties and she ended up having all her 4 children over the age of 35. She says a lot of that was because she relaxed about her pre-conceived ideas.

In short - don't stress yourself out about the 30 mark. If you have your first child at 31 it'll be no different!

Im 31, will be 32 if by some miracle our making baby plans went as planned, so dont stress Halloweeny! Although its well known it gets more difficult as you get older I still think people can struggle or have no problems at (almost) any age, and stressing about it definitely wont make it any easier. Im with you though, I dont get the pressure of having targets like that, saying I want to be married by this age and babied by this age - each to their own but i just dont think you can work life to a schedule like that!

It must be something about maternity/gynae wards in hospitals though, when OH was doing a gynae job about 3 years ago one of the consultants kept saying he need to get a move on and get me pregnant lol

I always wanted a baby before I was 30, but the big 3-0 is now less than 2 months away so don't think that's gonna happen!!

If you are healthy, have regular periods which are not exessively painful or heavy and have a healthy BMI then I really don't think that a couple of years into your 30s will make any differences at all. If not, then maybe think about some health checks or making lifestyle changes. I think if you are talking about 35+ it can be a different matter, although of course a lot of people will conceive naturally in their late 30s.

I agree with Treacle Tart, I think stress and pressure can have a massive impact - not just on how quickly you may conceive but on your overall quality of life. I'm talking quality of life from my own experience and how quickly from close friends' experiences.

Hi everyone!

We get married September I'll be 29 OH will be 30 we'd quite like to start TTC fairly soon after so I'm not too sure when to come off my pill? Been on it around 10 years. Worried I may put weight on when I come off it so if I come off it before the wedding I may not get in my dress? Has anyone had any side effects of coming off the pill? X