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Curious June 2022 Cambridgeshire

Bridesmaid ignoring me

Expensivepurplebridesmaid50886, 20 February, 2020 at 11:40 Posted on Planning 0 5
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One of my bridesmaids has been ignoring me for the past week. There was a bit of a disagreement last week about a very petty situation and she has over reacted and taken it out on me (bride). She has been planning my hen party and has decided that on one of the days all of the girls will wear orange I will wear white. A few of the girls have mentioned they can’t find anything in that colour so my sister, another bridesmaid, decided to change the colour to pink. Everyone was happy with that. My friend then sent me a really abusive message (after ignoring me all day) accusing me of changing her plans and being nasty towards my sister. At the time she text me I was in hospital with my sick mother in law (to be) and told my friend that no one has done anything to upset on her purpose and that I don’t care what colour people wear as it’s a very minor issue with everything going on in the world. It’s all very childish playground behaviour. I’ve since text her and asked if she had a nice weekend. Which she has ignored. She did text me the other night asking if I can go to her friends birthday party but the message was very blunt and short. I don’t know what to do. I have a lot going on at the moment with coming to end of our wedding plans and my mother in law being extremely unwell in hospital. I don’t want to be arguing with my friend but I also don’t have the energy to try and keep talking to her if she is going to carrying ignoring me about something so tiny. Does anyone have any advice what I can do?

5 replies

Latest activity by zaraahmad, 24 February, 2020 at 11:24
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    Rockstar June 2020
    HappyBlueCars582 ·
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    Either go to her house or pick up the phone and phone her. I’m assuming she’s a really close friend if you’ve asked her to be your bridesmaid?

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  • E
    Curious June 2022 Cambridgeshire
    Expensivepurplebridesmaid50886 ·
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    She’s one of my best friends and we’ve been friends for over 10 years. I know she is not happy with her personal life and has taken it out on a lot of people who are close to her and has fallen out with other friends because of her behaviour. I’m just scared if I continue talking about it then I’ll be another friend that she falls out with for good.

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  • R
    VIP July 2020 Monmouthshire
    RomanticGreenStationery27135 ·
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    Your bridesmaid may have a lot going on in her personal life, but so do you! Having a lot going on is no excuse for her.

    I agree with the previous comment - ring her or pop round to see her in person and see if you can clear the air. Maybe she feels insecure or worried about planning the hen do and took your sister's changes as a criticism? If she really is a good friend, she should be prepared to let this go, as it really is a trivial issue. And if she isn't...better you find out now than immediately pre-wedding (or during the wedding).

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  • HappyPinkHair15172
    Dedicated September 2022 Merseyside
    HappyPinkHair15172 ·
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    Hi

    Sounds like there is more to this than meets the eye.

    I know you’ve got a lot going on, but this sounds like it’s perhaps covering up something else and maybe your friend would really appreciate a personal visit from you.

    best of luck

    Ali

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  • H
    Rockstar June 2020
    HappyBlueCars582 ·
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    I was a bridesmaid a few years ago and I hated every second of it! I even tried to get out of it my friend said I was just being silly and I wish I had been more forceful and just said that I wasn’t doing it. Just double check that she’s not feeling the same way and is maybe behaving the way she is in the hope that you’ll say she doesn’t have to be a bridesmaid if she doesn’t want to be anymore. I wouldn’t ask anyone to do it, after my experience of being one and I definitely felt pressured in to doing it.

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  • zaraahmad
    Curious August 2021
    zaraahmad ·
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    As you told that she is your old friend. So i think you should get in touch with her in any way possible. she must be feeling that you have given her a responsibility now invoked her power or decision. I understand that its a tiny thing but still you must care as she is your friend and bridesmaid as well.

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