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Beginner September 2025 Tuscany

Bridesmaids - Not Wanting Too Many But Scared to Disappoint! Any Nice Tips?

Lucy, 12 of February of 2024 at 23:26 Posted on Etiquette and Advice 0 1

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Hi all,

I'm currently in the process of planning my wedding for September 25, I haven't asked any of my friends to be bridesmaids yet but I have a few big groups of friends (some from home, some from London, some from childhood etc), and I want to avoid as much disappointment as possible by just asking three of my closest/family so it doesn't start a chain reaction, and also so I don't end up with loads of bridesmaids.

I wondered if anyone has any nice ideas on things I can do for my other really close girls to still feel a part of the day and special? (Things like asking them to do a speech, organise the hen, wear a certain colour - I don't know!). I know they will absolutely understand but would like them to know I have considered them and thought of a way of keeping them close

Thanks so much, any advice hugely appreciated!

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Latest activity by RomanticGreenStationery27135, 13 of February of 2024 at 17:44

VIP July 2020 Monmouthshire
RomanticGreenStationery27135 · 13 of February of 2024 at 17:44
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I think most people realise that a bride can't invite all her friends to be bridesmaids! If you just have one or two close friends who won't be bridesmaids, then maybe one could be a witness and the other one do a reading? Or put them in charge of bringing bits and pieces to the reception (e.g. if you are having a guest book or a box for wedding cards)? Or handing out orders of service to guests?
Organising the hen do is tricky because that's normally the bridesmaids' job, but if you are having a big hen, the bridesmaids might be glad of one or two extra people helping.
Or you could just write a note to each friend telling her how much her friendship means to you. So often, we only say how much someone means to us at their funeral, when it's a bit late!!! But it can feel a bit weird telling someone how much they mean to you 'out of nowhere'. A wedding is a good time for sharing stuff like this, and I bet a message saying "Thanks for being such a great friend. I'll always remember when you..." is going to be treasured a lot more than any outfit or 'role' at your wedding.
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