Charging guests to stay at the venue

I would go with a per room charge as thats how hotels usually work anyway and means you don't have the issue of people deciding to have a room to themselves. It's fairly standard these days to have a hotel to stay overnight, the only difference here is rather than booking it themselves, you've arranged their rooms for them. Do people have an option to find a cheaper hotel thats slightly further away if they want to?

I would put the wording as you have but put £160 per room as if you put per person like you say ppl may say they will leave their OH or may say well we will have 3 or 4 in our room and split the bill 4 ways where as if you put it will be 2 guests per room with the cost of £160 It makes it clear. Also maybe don't have the dinner the Friday they can choose to eat when and where or do what my friend done and have a meal in a local pub by the hotel (everyone pays for them selves) then drinks back in the hotel bar! HTH x

I think you are being VERY generous by paying so much towards the accomodation, AND, paying for everyones meals. In all the weddings I have been to (both in the UK/Australia & abroad elsewhere), I have never had accomodation paid for,

I've had a slight discount, say 10%, because of a special rate at a certain hotel, but never had it paid for or even subsidised. How can you afford to pay for a whole weekend away for all yours guests? Could you not just subsidise the sat night & get them a special rate for the fri night?

Despite your generousity, you will still have people moan about something as you cant please everyone. Just make it clear on the invite what they need to pay. Is it £80 per person per night, or for £80 per person for both nights? You may find some guests just cant stay both nights due to work anyway. If you have guests that live nearby, will you pay for their travel to/from to make up for them not staying in the hotel?

I went to a wedding in NZ and only got accommodation because I was part of the wedding party. You are being very generous with offering to pay for all that, and I don't think people could have much to complain about paying £80. I'd just make it clear that it is per room and not per person so that people don't think they can avoid bringing their OH and save money

Hi! Sorry if I am a little daft but I am not entirely sure why your guests will have to stay the 2 nights? You say you don't think it will work out with the venue but can I ask why you think this is the case?

Is it due to the timings of your wedding day or something out of your control?

When OH and I got married last year (we, like you, got married quite a distance from where the majority of people lived) we had a late ceremony so that people had all day to travel and could check into their rooms with enough time to relax and then get ready...i.e. check in was at 2pm and the ceremony was at 4pm in the hotel. We had people coming from as far as London & Scotland (to York) and they made it with plenty of time. Plus our hotel was really flexible with early check in's and said that people could check in early as long as the rooms were available/ready at no extra cost, which they were.

Some of our guests travelled the day before and stayed in the hotel at their own expense. OH and I were also in York the night before and we all met up and went to a restaurant in the evening. However, we did not pay for this, nor did we pay for their rooms for the extra night.

We were very much of the mindset that is people wanted to arrive early then they had to book the rooms directly with the hotel themselves, we stayed out of it as it wasn't necessary!

I hope this helps and that I haven't waffled too much!!

Good luck with your planning xxx

If you have a certain amount you want to contribute towards your guests stay just deduct it from what the total cost will be per night and quote that amount.

We are having 20 guests staying 2 nights prior to our wedding at our venue. We just let them and all of our other guests know the discounted rate we have negotiated and what is inclusive and the rest is up to them to book and settle. It just saves any confusion.

Hi. I think you are being VERY geneorus paying for any of it tbh! which hotel is it out of interest (i am from the lake district!) I think that wording sounds fine, like the others said I would put the price per room rather than per person, just in case. And as most of the guests are close friends and family, Im sure they wont mind paying it at all! x

We are also having our wedding in the lake district which is out of our own area but this was done in part so that neither side of the family had to pay out more than the other to attend. (My side is mainly in Scotland, OH mainly around south Yorkshire)

Although we have not chosen not to book a venue exclusively, 1 exclusive venue did offer to deduct the agreed rate of each room booked and paid in advance by our guests from our final bill, this meant we didn't have the awkward situation you find yourself in now as you would just include it in your accommodation info as normal.

Maybe you could speak to your venue and see if they could arranged this for you (even if you still want to subsidies each room) ?

I think the majority of guests that attend weddings out of their area expect to pay for their accommodation anyway .

Good Luck x

I've never been to a wedding where I was instructed that I HAD to stay the night before, even when I've travelled quite a distance. Also, I've never been to a wedding where my room was paid for, even weddings of wealthy family members. Usually they just secure a discounted rate at a local hotel or, as in your case, the venue itself, and it is thenm up to the guests to pay for their rooms.

Telling your guests that one night will be paid for will probably make a lot of them say, "well, I'm not coming for the Friday," which is honestly entirely up to them. You can't give a price per person, you have to say per room, but what I suggest is that you tell your guests that you've secured a reduced rate for rooms at the venue (even though it's through your own contributions)- and that the rooms will be £80 PER NIGHT, not per person (in fact, I would charge half the cost of the room AT LEAST, so more like £100-120). Suggest to your guests that they come for both nights, but if they can only afford to come for the one, you will still only be contributing the set amount you planned.

No wedding guests will expect their room to be paid for. Weddings are expensive enough as it is!!

The very close friends of mine who will be finding it difficult to pay for the rooms in our venue will get personal calls from me telling them we'll be helping them out with the cost, but ONLY those friends/cousins (there are only maybe 3).