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Beginner September 2024 Essex

Colleagues at your wedding...

Emma, 8 August, 2024 at 11:30 Posted on Etiquette and Advice 0 10

Hi all,


Please help! I've had my first wedding melt down today and spent the start of the working day crying in the toilets over whether to invite a specific colleague to my wedding. I work in a small team (12 of us) and I made it very clear from the beginning that I am having a small wedding and unfortunately I will not be able to extend an invite to colleagues. I've also kept wedding talk to a minimum only answering basic questions about it so as to not make it a big deal in the office. I do however, have 2 colleagues that I consider close friends - we socialise outside of work, are always chatting on our group chat and I even went on holiday with one of them earlier in the year - and so naturally I have invited the 2 of them. Now a different colleague who I don't see often (and who for my first year and a half working here ignored me) is making me feel uncomfortable by asking if they're invited to my wedding every time I see him. I have been clear every time saying no, numbers are tight and I've had to exclude members of my family. But he is being soooo persistent and even my 2 work friends are starting to make me feel bad saying "why not, he's sweet and means well". I don't know what to do and would love some help!

10 replies

Latest activity by Victoria, 19 February, 2026 at 00:32
  • R
    Genius July 2020 Monmouthshire
    RomanticGreenStationery27135 ·
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    Far from being 'sweet', your work colleague is behaving completely inappropriately. Asking if he was invited once was a bit cheeky, but to persist when he's been told 'no' is extremely rude and also harassment. I think you need to be a little less 'nice' in your response. The next time he raises the topic, just say "I have already told you that you are not invited" and change topic. If he persists, I would consider complaining to your HR department - continually asking a work colleague to include you in her private social life is harassment.

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  • Jessica
    Beginner October 2025 Tyne & Wear
    Jessica ·
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    I wouldn’t feel bad. Weddings are stressful enough without someone you don’t consider a friend making you feel uncomfortable. They are also expensive so I feel it is completely acceptable to not spend money on someone you don’t really want there. If him being there won’t add anything to your day then I’d stick to the no! Hopefully he will soon get the hint and stop asking
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  • H
    Beginner September 2025 North Yorkshire
    Hayley ·
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    I have said to my work colleagues that the ceremony is family only and they may be invited to the reception. I have not sent them save the dates so they know it will be just the evening as I'm not close with them and do not socialise with them outside of work so they are not far up my list of people to invites so will see what my other guests RSVP before making any final decisions as my work colleagues took a similar stance to your friend and assumed they were invited when I told them I had a date and venue.

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  • Lexie
    Rockstar December 2025 Jiangsu
    Lexie ·
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    Your wedding is your call—stick to your small guest list rule. This colleague’s pushiness isn’t your problem, and your work friends’ guilt-tripping is unfair. Remind them you drew a line to keep it intimate, even cutting family. Be firm but polite, and don’t let anyone make you sacrifice your peace for their comfort.

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  • Sila
    New York
    Sila ·
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    I wouldn’t feel guilty at all. Weddings are already stressful, and the last thing you need is someone you don’t truly see as a friend making you uncomfortable. They’re also costly events, so it’s completely reasonable not to spend money on someone you don’t genuinely want there. If his presence wouldn’t add anything positive to your day, it’s best to keep saying no. Hopefully, he’ll take the hint soon and stop pushing.

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  • Leoparker
    Dedicated July 2021 Mississippi
    Leoparker ·
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    It looks beautiful to see you colleagues at your wedding because they will manage some responsibilities on your wedding and also provide confidence to you.

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  • M
    Beginner December 1999 North Carolina
    Michael ·
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    What a wonderful celebration! It’s always amazing to see colleagues come together outside of work and share such joyful moments. By the way, if anyone is curious about local property details, I recently found some helpful information on Davenport property lookup that made exploring real estate in the area so much easier. Truly a memorable day for everyone involved!

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  • A
    Beginner December 1999 North Carolina
    Adam ·
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    Wow, it’s so heartwarming to see colleagues come together on such a special day! Moments like these really show the importance of community and support. For anyone looking to understand more about the system, I recently found a useful Mississippi prison visit guide that explains key procedures and tips. Truly, celebrating these milestones reminds us how meaningful connections are both inside and outside work.

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  • E
    Beginner December 1999 Kansas
    Ethan ·
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    What a wonderful celebration! It’s always inspiring to see colleagues come together in such joyful moments. By the way, for anyone needing quick access to detailed Bibb prisoner info this site is really thorough and easy to navigate. Moments like this remind us how important community and connection are, both personally and professionally. Wishing the newlyweds a lifetime of happiness!

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  • V
    Beginner December 1999 North Carolina
    Victoria ·
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    What a beautiful celebration! It’s always wonderful to see colleagues come together in such a joyful way. Speaking of keeping things organized, I recently found the Duval court records very helpful for quickly accessing important legal information. Moments like these remind us how important both planning and support are, whether for work or personal milestones. Wishing you both all the happiness ahead!

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