Distant bridesmaid

I could be way off The mark here but say you have both had a rough couple of years. Also are best friends. Is it possible that she's not in a great place at the moment yet doesn't want to expect you to be there for her as she doesn't want to bring you down and just let you have your excitement?

You will be seeing her face to face so I would mhave a chat with her. Ask if everything is OK, tell her you're a bit worried about her as she seems a bit distant. Maybe she's just getting everything prepared to be away? Maybe she feels a bit down in as much as although she is happy for you it highlights that she's not that happy. I would have the chat about her not the wedding. Once that's sorted then maybe you can say that there are things you will need answers to etc once she's away. Ask if the Facebook group is the best way to contact her about wedding decisions or is a different way that's better for her.

If this is out of character for her, then maybe she has something else going on and doesn't want to bother you with it at a busy time? You say she's your best friend, so maybe the best way to approach it is to say "You've seemed really distant lately. It's not like you - is everything ok?".

You are both completely right. I definitely need to ask her how she's doing and need to just be upfront about it.

I suppose I'm worried as I've tried messaging and calling and she's not got back to me which I am a bit upset about as I feel like she's shutting me out of everything, and I don't want her to think I'm just upset because of/obsessed with wedding stuff.

It could also be right that she has been distant because she wants me to just have the excitement and enjoy preparations, I hadn't thought of it like that.

Thank you both ? x x

When I was having breast cancer treatment friends who were supportive didn't mention any problems they were having their own lives. I was upset when I found out but it was always oh I didn't want to bother you as you had enough on your plate! Or hpw could i complain to youmaboutmthos when youremdealing with so much worse. It wouldn't have stopped me being there for them and itmwadntmworse just different but they didn't think like that. So maybe its this sort of that she doesn't want her problems to spoil your excitement.

If it turns out theremis nothing to worry about then maybe she is just someone who doesn't see any rush or feels off having to share this with others in a larger group maybe.

I hope you get to the bottom of it. X

I don't have any advice but I just wanted to say that I totally understand where you're coming from. One of my bridesmaids just bought a house and a new puppy (she can't have any more children so this is like a second child to her). I don't talk to her about the wedding often because I know she's busy, but when I do ask a question and need an answer she will respond days later with something completely unrelated. I'm very excited for her and want to hear about what's going on in her life, but I do need to talk about wedding logistics as well. It's getting to the point where I really need her to order her bridesmaid dress (she lives far away from me) and I'm not sure how I can make her see this is urgent without coming across rude or self-centered. If you figure out a good approach I'd love to hear it!