divorced parents (who do not get on) top table ideas...

I always come across this when doing weddings, the way we usually get around this is to have Bride & Groom, Best Man & Bridesmaids on the top Table & the parents hosting a table so that they are then sepearted.

Aah... nice one.! I dont have that problem but would say

nice stepdad by the way ..!

if you are not having your side then I wouldnt have the OH's side either and avoid - as you can't put one on and not the other.

To be honest, I would do as you said and have the best man and bridesmaids etc and then have your family host their own table - ie your mum and stepdad have one, your dad and stepmum host another, Grooms parents host another etc.. that would work.

I would have suggested Sweetheart but you have said not an option

x

I've got a similar problem with my OH's parents. OH's dad is rather loud & opinionated, his ex wife is very sensitive & quite quiet. I know OH's dad will be looking to start an argument with his ex wife. Neither are remarried but OH's dad has got a new partner. I think we have no option but to have a long top table & have them sat at opposite ends. The only reason we are having Ushers is so they can act as bouncers for OH's dad!

Blimey were we all typing at the same time?? ?

My parents are divorced and although i get on with both step parents and my mum and dad are okay with each other i couldn't possibly sit them together so i'm just having me and my OH on a little round top table!

I didn't want a wedding breakfast this being one of the reasons but as it was cheaper then just an evening buffet (strange i know) this is my soloution he he think it will be quite nice ?

We have a simular problem, to say they don't get on is the understatement of the century, Mom has been threatening a good slap in the face to stepmom since the break up 9 years ago. (Well deserved i'd day, Stepmom used to be my auntie - ie married to my Uncle, mom's brother - all confussing I know!)

My solution has been..

But if you didn't want this - ask BMs, best man, ushers to join you

And then Mom, Dad and OHs parents each hosting their own tables VERY far apart. (with my bridesmaids inbetween to intercept).

EDITED TO ADD:

A more radical approach - don't have a table to yourself, have the above ie: Family on each table and then eat first course on one table, second course on the next and final course on final table?

We had a round table with my maid of honour, my folks, my in-laws (who are divorced) with the best man and his wife in between them. We sat my fil girlfriend with family. We figured it was only for the meal and they were all grown ups lol. That said had they caused a fuss we would have just had a table with the bridal part (i.e best man + his wife, maid of honor, master of cermonies and his wife.

Personally I'd say to all four of them that if they can't put their differences aside for one day - your day - and promise to leave their grudges/arguments at the door, then they aren't welcome to come.

Oh, and ask your venue not to offer chocolate sauce with dessert...

Yes, I am leaning towards this. The only thing stopping me is that I am worried that h2b's parents may get upset... that said, h2b is one of 4 and is the last to get married, they will have lapped up the parents of the groom limelight 3 times before our wedding!

? ha ha ha ha

I just choked on my cup of tea at that! Could just see that happening at our wedding lol! ?

Depending on how many table you have, my friends did the change the table routine and it went down well where after every course they moved to the next table taking there drinks and the married couple managed to sit on every table, by making the speeches an extra course.

AJ - Sometimes it's just not that easy, I know it SHOULD be, but it isn't. What made me realise this is my mom suggested going to the local the other day and I knew my ex was there so refused, she said "so it's OK for you to refuse to see yours with his new wife but not for me to do the same" - I said fair point.. although did point out me and my ex didn't have children together and hence never made a lifelong commitment and bond to each other which got me out of the sticky situation

I know my circumstance is more than a bit tricky due to the situation (My mom and Stepmom (auntie at the time) also has a business together etc but when I tried this it would have sadly it meant I would be getting married without either of my parents, and that wasn't an option to me.

I have it in good faith from all parties that no one will embaress me or themselves on the day.

As the old saying goes, you can choose your friends but you can't choose your family

Oh boy do I ever know that!!!! I'm wondering if I should warn the police so they can be on stand by for our wedding lol!

If only! You'd think in this modern world we live in there would be some way..... ?

We have similar issues with my parents - who have not met for over 15yrs and had a very bad divorce/marriage! I think we will have my mum and dad on the top table with OH's parents but at different ends of the table. My BM and his Best man are both chatty people and will be able to 1)put my mum at ease in the case of the best man and 2) charm my dad in the case of the BM.

My stepdad will go on a table with my nana (mum's mum) and aunt (mum's sister) and uncle all of whom he has known for many years and gets on well with and some friends of mine who are similar in age so he will be ok. My stepmum will go on a table with my gradparents on my dad's side and I am inviting her parents too as they are lovely and have always looked out for me so she should be ok too. (stepdad's mum died last year so he has no family for me to invite anymore)

I am hoping they will remember they are adults and that they should behave as it's an important day for me and OH. Neither of my brothers are married so it will be interesting to see what they do when they get there!

The more pressing issue for me is do we have a meal for all the parents before the wedding so that initial meeting is not at the actual wedding or will this make it worse...